Anarchy inc. ...proudly presents... 1/27/85 Written by: The $heik Let's face it. It's not

Master Index Current Directory Index Go to SkepticTank Go to Human Rights activist Keith Henson Go to Scientology cult

Skeptic Tank!

------------ Anarchy inc. ...proudly presents... 1/27/85 ------------ How to Tell if YOU are a Modem Geek! Written by: The $heik Let's face it. It's not one of life's greatest mysteries, such as if the light really turns off when you close the refrigerator door? And what the hell that little dog's name on Pettycoat Junction is? But have you ever wondered if you were a modem geek? Well, it's time for a SHEIK EXCLUSIVE. So, why not take the test, and find out... 1. Is calling a Bulletin Board System the highlight of your day? 2. If it weren't for modems, would your social life be nothing? 3. Do you set your alarm in the middle of the night, just so you can get on the popular BBS of your town? 4. Do you hang around the computer room at your school...on ALL your breaks? 5. Is Steve Wozniack the man you would pick for the "Time Magazine Man of the Year" award? 6. Do you sleep with your modem? 7. Do you eat dinner in front of your modem...Every night? 8. Do you find modems more intresting than that cute little blond in Biology? 9. Would you turn down tickets to the Super Bowl, just so you can log-on to a system while everyone else if watching the game? 10. Were you under ten when you got your modem? 11. Do you like it when a system plans something for all the members (such as, to see a movie) so you can stay home, and log onto the system, while everyone else is meeting each other? 12. Are you stereotyped as the "Computer Geek" at school? 13. Is it impossible for somebody to talk to you on your voice line, without using a 2600 kz tone? 14. Do you save up all your money, just so you can buy the newest modem each year, that rated a '10' with "Better Computing"? 15. Do you think this year's superbowl champions were the New York Islanders? 16. Do you auto-dial AE lines? 17. Do you call your modem by name? 18. Does the modem stimulate you in more ways than one? 19. Do you have more than eight ball point pens in your pocket? Not to mention write-protect tabs, head cleaners, etc... 20. Are you the VanMaster, the Champion Eternal, Matt Ackeret, Princess Leia, Inver Brass, The Jackal, or Mr. Maverick? (This last line was added by the Bullseye...) SCORING: if you answered 'YES' to none, then you're cool. No problem. 1-2 You need to get your priorities straight. 3-7 Well, it's not too late yet...Maybe, just maybe... 8-12 Have your parents beat it out of you. 13-16 Let's put it this way..."Revenge of the Nerds" was your movie. 17-20 You're a modem geek. In other words, blow up your apple, and start your life over. And if you scored more than twenty, not only are you a modem geek, but you can't count! There were only twenty possible, bub. DISCLAIMER: Well, I hope we here at Anarchy inc. didn't offend anybody, but...hey...somebody had to do it. Have a nice day. $$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$The Sheik$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$ in association with Anarchy inc. (c) MCMLXXXV All rights shot to hell.


E-Mail Fredric L. Rice / The Skeptic Tank