From: firstname.lastname@example.org (Phil Gustafson)
Subject: Re: Napoleon's penis
manley@optilink.UUCP (Dave Manley) writes:
>Speaking of detached members did anyone see a recent story
>regarding Napoleon's autopsy? Supposedly, the doctor, sick
>of dealing with Napoleon's ego and bad temperament docked
>the little guy's dick out of spite when no one was looking.
>Someone claims to still have it today.
According a _Washington Post_ article reprinted in the Oct. 7 _San
Jose Mercury News_, the general and his johnson may well have parted
company 171 years ago. The pickled Imperial Peter is purportedly in
the possession of urologist John Lattimer at the Columbia Presbyterian
Post pundit Peter Mikelbank says:
Officially, the general's privates are where they've always been:
with the remainder of the body, in its crypt beneath the gold dome at
the Hotel des Invalides. Unofficially though, there is growing
concern among the French that their Napoleonic unmentionables may be
elsewhere; that a bone of contention may exist between France and
the United States; and that, perhaps, their noble heritage may
derive in part from a legacy that is not so much gilded, but
My, he had fun writing that. The article goes on to say that in the
Spring of 1821 Napoleon's British doctor was fired and replaced by an
Italian pathologist, apparently to make the autopsy easier after
Bonaparte shucked the coil. He did so in May, and the autopsy was
performed under military guard. This was not sufficient to save the
Lattimer said the sight and particularly the scent of an autopsy
performed in a tropical climate would have forced even the most
stout-hearted soldier from the room. "And in those circumstances,
it would have been easy for the Italian to nip off a little
The "revenge" is in a jar where Lattimer teaches.
What resembles a pickled pinkie came into Lattimer's possession
roughly 20 years ago, at a price Lattimer calls "a substantial sum.
I knew as long as it was floating around, it was subject to
derision. I recognized all the perils, but my interest in buying
it was to stop it from any further crude exposure."
There is of course more than a dollop of doubt about the denoument of
the dictator's dingaling. The curators at Invalides hang up on
callers with cock questions, and the newspapers have given the issue
little space. Lattimer himself isn't sure, but can associate the
world-conquering weenie with many better-documented bits of Napoleana.
French historian Jean Tulard says:
"It is profane! Incredible but possible.... There is not a single
significant document authenticating this claim ... only, perhaps, a
note from Vignali", a cleric Napoleon insulted when offered the last
rites. The note reportedly said, "Voila'! I have it."
Give it a "U", Terry.
Quoted material has been edited for brevity and is presented here
under the principle of fair use.
Phil "The whole thing gives me the willies" Gustafson