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$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$ $$$$$$$$$ $$$$$$$$$$ $$$$$$$$$$ HOLY TEMPLE of MASS CONSUMPTION $$$$$$$$$$$ $$$$$$$$$$$ $$$$$$$$$$$$ $$$$$$$$$$$$ *N*E*W*S* $$$$$$$$$$$$$ $$$$$$$$$$$ Issue #8 $$$$$$$$$$$$ $$$$$$$$$$ $$$$$$$$$$$ $$$$$$$$$ High Weirdness Issue $$$$$$$$$$ $$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$ Contents: High Weirdness update MicroRant "Bob" invades the NeXT computer Banished CPU BBS ad execution of Those Who Prefer Miracle Whip For more info, send all your money to: Holy Temple of Mass Consumption SLACK@ncsu.edu PO Box 30904 netoprwa@ncsuvm.BITNET Raleigh, NC 27622 Finer BBS's everywhere ----------------------------------------------------------------------------- The "High Weirdness by Mail" concept needs to be perpetuated. Most of the things listed in the book don't exist any more! What better source for current information than alt.slack? I propose that if you know of some utterly slackful or even slackless source, POST IT! That way, we can all join in the fun... I'll start. Here's a good one: Dean M. Epstein International Student Complex Alternative Learning Programs 1023 Hilgard Avenue Los Angeles, CA 90024-0841 (213) 208-7813 These people claim to want to promote "world harmony and understanding." All I can see that they do is ask for money (sound familiar?). Their approach is novel; at first, they act like they don't want your money, but, if you show the slightest interest, you will be bombarded with incredibly strange mailings (tantric healings, glasnost poetry, worms of the world) and, if you use a "foreign" sounding name, they will send you the most hilarious materials in bad foreign languages. I used a fake Japanese name, and had a friend look at the results. He said it was meaningless nonense-but what a concept! Their English stuff is pretty good, so I used another address and wrote in German-the results were wild! I'm not sure what this is all about, but it is funny, and since I think it is at least partially tax supported, it should be free for the asking. Anyway, boys and girls, let's find the best sources of free entertainment and post 'em here! "Bob" would want you to! -------------------- >I recommend "The Skeptical Inquirer" as an excellent and refreshing >alternative to the unsubstantiated claims of the paranormal that we are >frequently exposed to and often asked to accept. Subscriptions are $22.50 per >year (Box 229, Buffalo NY 14215-0229). > Other publications of the same type are: The British & Irish Skeptic (Manchester Skeptics 71, Bury & Bolton Road Radcliffe, Manchester UK M26 0LF) 10 pounds UK. 14 pounds overseas surface Local, regional, and national organizations "with aims similar to those of SCICOP" also publish their own newsletters. There are currently over 70 such organizations worldwide. A listing can be found in any SKEPTICAL INQUIRER. -------------------- NSCE REPORTS National Center for Science Education P.O. Box 9477 Berkeley, CA 94709-0477 The NSCE is mainly concerned with science education in public schools, and especially with countering the attempts to introduce "creationism" into public school *science* curricula. There are state organizations, commonly called "Committees of Correspondence," loosly associated with NSCE, and sharing the same goals. The California Committee publishes BACC SCIENCE. Four other committees publish regular newsletters. A listing of these newsletters can be found in the July-August NSCE REPORTS. -------------------- CREATION/EVOLUTION 7 Harwood Drive P.O. Box 146 Buffalo, NY 14226-0146 This is the premier resource for debunking of creationist claims. It is published by the American Humanist Association, but I detect no Humanist bias in the material. A subscriber will however, find himself on the Humanist mail lists. -------------------- Damn straight! What an excellent idea! Much of "High Weirdness" was culled >from Factsheet Five, a weirdness source. If you want to subscribe: Factsheet Five c/o Michael Gunderloy 6 Arizona Ave. Rensselear, NY 12144 Bulk Rate 1st Class Sample $3 $3.75 6 issues $16 $21 -------------------- CULTS: (WHACKO CHRISTIAN) Jumping for Jesus Club! Coach Dennis Clark forms ministry clubs of little kids who jump rope for Jesus, travelling the country spreading the Good Word. Teams have names like the Popping Preachers, The Hallelujah Hoppers, and the Faith Movers. Pretty slick, huh? Repetitive physical movement and religious indoctrination have always been a good way to brainwashh people and little kids are ideal subjects. Hmmmmm.....Hey, Robbie, c'mere! Jump this rope... Church of the Creator: PinKs Vs Muds!!!!! Yes, the glories of the Racial Loyalty Newletter brought to you in glorious black and white! Try the Religion of the White Trash Race! Forget God, Jesus, even Odin! ---- only Aryan mortals are worthy of global ownership! The MUD RACES must DIE! Yes join the Church of the Creator, and learn what it really is to be a twisted , senile, over the top hatemonger.... Find out about Hitler's UFO Forces! The 'Rotten Roots' of Jesse Jackson! Christmas is Baal-Worship! The Dangers of Eating Pork! Obey! or Taste My Loving Wrath! The Christian Technocrats: The White Brotherhood must stand up to the The Forces of Darkness! Only those santified by the Pure Light of Scientific Reason can truly understand why Our Lord came to this miserable mud ball.He came many light years ago crossing the Endless Void alone to carry the message of the Space Brothers.... The Council of Chalcedon: Masturbation is Murder!!!! Yes, that's RIGHT!!! Women want rights over their bodies?? But what rights do 20 million unborn babies have over their VERY SOULS!!?? And what about SPERMS!!?? Don't you think they cry out in horror as they meet needless death on the cold, hard tile of the bathroom floor?!!!! -------------------- National Socialist Movement PO Box 42 Chillicothe OH 45601 USA Polish the jackboots, honey, we're going to the Party! My enemy's enemy is my friend, Right? Sieg...I mean, God Bless Amerika! -------------------- Fusion Magazine (and other LaRouche booklets) Box 17149, Washington DC 20041 The People's Temple of Politics, with Jonestown just around the corner... Do NOT subscribe yourself. These people are so rich and so off the wall they're scary... Approach with caution; these guys can afford to use the kind of tactics the poorer hate groups can only fantasize about.... -------------------- National Federation For Decency PO Drawer 2440 Tupelo MS 38803 Bet you thought sex was NATURAL, right? Wrong! It's evil and depraved and practised in the dark by twisted, dopesucking buttfucking commie pinko queers like YOU! -------------------- Christian National Socialist White America Party Box 1133 Pacific Palisades CA 90272 What can you say? Put your MP on their mailing list. -------------------- Christians Awake PO Box 3513 West End Station Birmingham AL 35211 All politicians are under the control of UFO Zionist Freemasons! Even Jesus is the AntiChrist --- half of the time!!! One issue of their magazine goes into mind-boggling detail showing how the mathematical dimensions of the Washington monument prove that it is a phallic symbol erected by Masonic Jews and Catholic Devils. -------------------- Action Amenities 1093 Broxton Ave Suite 567 Los Angeles CA 90024 Hate-psychosis materials for the seriously stoned. Psycho-racist rant cassettes and spiritually obscene materials.... That's Right! Love Me ---- or Die! -------------------- Christian Anti-Communist Crusade 227 E.Sixth St Box 890 Long Beach CA 90801-0941 Name says it all. Stereotypes apply here. Put your local Church on their mailing list. Wait, what if they're ALREADY on it? -------------------- Spiral Feedback PO Box 80323 Lincoln NE 68501 George Bush is about to put everyone in concentration camps! Ronald Reagon was a Disney created Android! Freedom of Choice is a Tool of Satan! The Pope is the AntiChrist! Time is running out! -------------------- Spiral Mobius Spiral Enterprises 347 N.Union Station Kennet Square PA 19348 Government-built UFOs! Clone Androids of high US officials! Gang rapes by alien bloodsuckers maquerading as telecommunications engineers, ice-creams salespeople and intelligence operatives! -------------------- Truth Missionaries of Positive Accord PO Box 42772 Evergreen Park IL 60642 Listen Unheeding Earth-Fools...Are YOU one of the assigned creatures? No? Well bad luck, pal, because you'll miss out on the Milk Rays from the Black Hole, Eternal Youth, Riches Beyond Your Wildest Dreams, and ETERNAL LIFE --- or your MONEY BACK!!! -------------------- Asatru Free Assembly PO Box 1754 Breckenridge TX 76024-1754 Hoar-Frost Giants LIVE! If you're into Marvel Comix Thor, you'll feel right at home amongst these hairy 'Doctors For Wotan' Frolic with burly red-bearded Agar and the other Dwarf-Lords at the Northern Lights Hot Tub and Spa! -------------------- Entertaining Demons Unawares SouthWest Radio Church PO Box 1144 Oklahoma City OK 73101 Star Wars/Dungeons and Dragons and WonderWoman's AntiChrist Satanic connections in horrifying detail. You'll be raptured to death over this one! -------------------- Lighthouse Publications 2402 E.Denmar Avenue Lufkin TX 75901 Cloned Homo Nazi Punks In YOUR Future. Gags and restraining straps not included. -------------------- Aryan Nations Church of Jesus Christ Christian Box 362 Hayden Lake ID 83835 You don't even need to play it backwards! Yes! 'Bye Bye Miss American Pie' is an unbelievably detailed piece of Biblical Prophecy! This one song reveals the 'decisive struggle' between America and the heathen armies gathering on our central american doorstep. Yes! MORE will be REVEALED!!!! ----------------------------------------------------------------------------- Let us not speak of Ferraris and Audis and other pacifiers of the CON generation. Those adult playthings that are sucked upon to please the Andrew Jacksonheads in our pockets. Pablumstyles of the Rich and would-be-famous. Let us speak instead of the Xists Giant Terrarium, that ozone depleted chunk of rock we call the Earth. It is now nearly 2000 years since a guy was nailed to a tree for saying how nice it would be if we would all give each other some slack. Things are even weirder now than they were then and this is the first run-on sentence of the third paragraph and if you don't like it, well kill me, and I'll just keep right on talking, er, typing, er having telepathy with this silicon life form because I just had a Margarita on a Sunday afternoon after decorating the house because the CON says I should and I don't want to blow my cover just yet because great things are in store for the following solar year that the CON says is 1991 but really isn't because they've brainwashed us all and changed the calendar on us and decided not to tell the really stupid people because they might panic and then the CON would have a whole pile of excrement on their collective appendages and the Sunday afternoon Sun coming through my office window is setting on my would-be-bleeding head and Frosty the Snowman is on the root window of my Xist Window screen and I'm feeling a little... Oh wow. There's a cloud outside my window that looks like a flying Saucer. Theeey're Heeeeere. -- Krazy Little-endian MoFo Clench of the Pin-shaped Head of Benny uunet!wang!gozer!klm ----------------------------------------------------------------------------- Just sitting here reading my copy of 0.9 NeXT manuals, and low and behold , on page 171 "Bob" appears: [instructions for the format of a data document]: "For example, to set the value of a field to J.R. "Bob" Dobbs enter the value "J.R. ""Bob"" Dobbs" not much going on here on a late, weird Friday afternoon, so I thought Bob had done "it" to us again!!! ;^>scb -- Steven C. Blair Computer Services Manager Frame Technology Inc. 2911 Zanker Road San Jose, Ca. 95134 Pick-A-Bone: scb@frame.com sblair@riacs.edu frame!scb@ames.arc.nasa.gov UUCP: {backbone(ames,adobe,riacs,vsi1)}!frame!nevdull!scb ----------------------------------------------------------------------------- YES, you should MOST CERTAINLY call: \ ______________ / | | -| Banished CPU |- |______________| / \ __________________________ [__________________________] _ _ [_] Not Recommended by [_] _ _ [_] Thought Police [_] __________________________ [__________________________] o System Operator: Maynard "the Main Nerd" o BBS software: RemoteAccess v1.01 and Waffle v1.64 o Most relevant hardware: o 300-38,400 bps (MNP 1-5, v32, v42, v42bis) Intel 9600EX modem o 675-megabyte 16ns Maxtor hard drive o Expanding and still under construction! We plan to go MULTI-LINE soon! o We plan to have regular Usenet news feeds soon! o No usage fees at this time! o Open to callers starting 00:01 AM, Friday, 08-09-91! o Telephone number: (503) 232-6566 -=> All points of view are welcome! -=> Primarily dedicated to FREEDOM OF SPEECH -=> Also dedicated to EXPOSING and FIGHTING FASCISM and RACISM -=> The Sysop is DISGUSTED with ISRAEL'S POLICIES! Support FREEDOM OF SPEECH! Read and speak FREELY about controversial things that are CENSORED elsewhere! Download and save COMPLETELY LEGAL (in the U.S.), EXTREMELY REVEALING texts -- easily among the MOST FREQUENTLY CENSORED in the WORLD! Exercise your right to INTELLECTUAL FREEDOM! Find out who is CONTROLLING HISTORY, the MEDIA, and the GOVERNMENT in America and elsewhere, EVEN AS YOU READ THIS! ^^^^ ^^ ^^^ ^^^^ ^^^^ Keep freedom ALIVE! Call today! (503) 232-6566 _____________________________________________________________ | | | Please TELL YOUR FRIENDS about Banished CPU. This ad tends | | to be censored. | |_____________________________________________________________| ----------------------------------------------------------------------------- Summary: execution of Those Who Prefer Miracle Whip Sender: Rev. Moses of the Dobbsodoxic Clench,3rd pyroneural orthonoxious synod (This is about to be a public service message from the Screamin' Church o' de Epilectic Jesus, so, like, listen up) Yeah....so the Stark Fist had grabbed me on that Special Part, I guess it must have been the Stark Fist of Retrieval tryin' to retrieve some o' my genetic material, and it was pretty close, but I guess it's presence triggered some Conspiracy sensors, and they turned off the hot water in my shower, and the Fist just fled and it took most of my slack with it...Yeah, I guess it's true what they say, that HE WHO TOUCHES HIMSELF SHALL EAT THE BREAD OF AFFLICTION, but it's a tastier bread than the homogenized pablum the Conspiracy shoves down our throats...we swallow-not-spit and think we like it.... man, the Con is everywhere...it's all around us...it's fat ladies in checkered dresses beating their children in the A&P...it's Christ without a penis...it's Presidents of these United Castor-head Pussies of America that look like they can't get erections anymore...it's waves radiating from your TV and telephone and family pets at subliminal levels advocating consumerism and life-without- mind...it's the whorship of millions of Americans of an obese aging unfropped Elvis...it's wave after wave of cattle mutilations sweeping the Midwest with the Xist-controlled media limiting the coverage of them to the Weekly World News, the only non-Con paper around...but I guess you knew all that...yeah, when they let me out they gave me a piece of paper that said my mind is OK, I got it right here...oh, wait, that's my brother's, he's still inside... anyway, how many people do you know that got a piece of paper says their mind's OK? I bet those ladies down at Job Service who threw me out don't have one, although actually what I have is a loaner mind they had lying around at the Place, they really kept my mind, I didn't like the idea at first but after their drugs and treatments under the Machine I came to see that it was best that my mind be kept there for analysis and experimentation, for the safety of humanity...Yeah, it's true that I've been bad...slackless...I've taken the Con's false drugs and partaken of it's false sex...but I repent, and I pray: O "BoB", you know that I am a fucker, a dickwad, shithead, and a pee-monger But "BoB", as you see me in my...naked glory Glorify me, that I may glorify YEE, yeah YEE who was were not the prophet spoken of by the prophet Eez-a--pee when he saith: Dokters fer BoB...and yet was somehow unconnected to the later slaying of John Lennon. Yeah, you know that Hypercleats, he ate my brain and vomited my mind back up into my brain pan ...I think there's some of my brain still in there with the diced carrots and creamed corn...but you know, I'm not sure. ----------------------------------------------------------------------------- @@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@ I walked in to the Burger King the @@@@@@@^^~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~^^@@@@@@@@ other day, and told the woman at the @@@@@@ @@@@@@ register that I had misdialed Fiji. @@@@@ w ww wi @@@@@ She said she couldn't give me instant @@@@, ~ ~~ ~I @@@@ credit. I said, "AT&T always did". @@@@' ; ,-@< @@@@ She blubbered, "But you're not dealing @@@@ _eW@@@ `@@@ with AT&T!" "Well I am NOW!" I said @@@@ @@@@@@@q j@@@@@@@ O @@@ as I stormed out the door. Then I @@@@ @@@@@@@@w___,w@@@@@@@@ @ @@@ walked to the nearest pay phone,called @@@@ @@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@ } @@@ the operator and ordered a Whopper. @@@@ @@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@ I @@@ @@@@ @@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@*@[ i @@@ @@@@ @@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@~ ; @@@ @@@@ @@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@[] | ]@@@ $ $ $ $ $ @@@@ @@@@@@@@@@@@@@[][ | @@@ 1 3 0 1 3 @@@@ ~_._ ~@@@@@@@~ ____~ @ @@@ @@@@ ;;- `@@@@@' @@@ @@@@ _~ ,en, `@@@~ en `@ ]l J@@@ @@@@ -()- @@@/ _-()- @ ]L @@@ | @@@@ , @@w@ww+ @@@ww``,,@w@ ][ @@@@ -+- @@@@ . @@ @ @@@~-zz..@@@ ][ @@@@ j @@@@, @@@@www@@@ @@@@@@@ww@@@@@[ @@@@ @@@@. @@@@&&&@@@ @@&@@@@@@@@@@@[ @@@@ His Rightful Assholiness @@@@@ || @@@@@@P' @@Q@@@@@@@@@@@[:C@@@@ J. R. "Bob" Dobbs @@@@@_ @@@@@@ @@ @@@@@@@@@@ ;$@@@@ @@@@@@w| '@@P~ ,@@@@-w, wU@@w'],@@@@@@ @@@@@@@ @@ P]@@@=~j ~Y@@^ ] @@@@@@ $20 @@@@@@@_ !@@t+ ~~ ]]@@@@@@ @@@@@@@[ - -J@@T# @@@@@@ @@@@@@@@,@ @@, _,,,,,,,y ,w@@[ ,@@@@@@@--WOOF! D R O N F The pipe is @@@@@@@@ @ @@ C !@@ @@@@@@@ R N alive! @@@@@@@@@ i @w. ====--_@@@@@ @@@@@@@@ O O @@@@@@@@@ @2' '@@@@~ @@@@@@@@ N R @@@@@@@@@@`,P~ / ~^^^^Y@@@@@ @@@@@@@@@ F N O R D @@@@@@@@@@@. y @@@@ @@@@@@@@@ @@@@^^=^@@^ ^' .@@@@@ _@@@@@@@@@@ Pen up your Nose! No One is Safe! @@@ , ,ww,w@@@@ _@@@@@@@@@@@ @@@_xJw w , @@@@@@@&~_@@@@@@@@@@@@ @@ @~ ~ ,@ @@@@@@@P _@@@@@@@@@@@@@ Send all negotiable securities to: @@ U. ,@@@,_____ _,J@@@@@@@@@@@@@ @@ v; @@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@ Holy Temple of Mass Consumption @@L `' ,@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@ PO Box 30904 @@~ _-@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@ Raleigh, NC 27622 @@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@ ----------------------------------------------------------------------------- Holy Temple of Mass $ >>> slack@ncsu.edu <<< $ "My used underwear Consumption! $ $ is legal tender in PO Box 30904 $ BBS: (919) 782-3095 $ 28 countries!" Raleigh, NC 27622 $ Warning: I hoard pennies. $ --"Bob"


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