(6) 25 Mar 94 01:58:00 Sent: Sat 26 Mar 0:27 By: Adam Sterling To: Glenda Stocks Re: Franc

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(6) 25 Mar 94 01:58:00 Sent: Sat 26 Mar 0:27 By: Adam Sterling To: Glenda Stocks Re: Francesca St: Rcvd Sent In transit ------------------------------------------------------------------------------ Date: 11:13 pm Tue Mar 1, 1994 Number : 28 of 41 From: Francesca Thoman Base : Dreams,Pastlives & Reincar To : All Refer #: None Subj: Manifestation Replies: None Stat: Sent Origin : 03-01-94 21:07 OBEHON IN "SPIRIT SPEAKS" MAGAZINE (c) 1993 FRANCESCA THOMAN FOR ELECTRONIC DISTRIBUTION ONLY ALL OTHER RIGHTS RESERVED HOW TO MANIFEST WHAT YOU WANT: OVERCOMING THE BARRIERS TO CHOOSING TO RECEIVE Not getting what you want in life, however uncomfortable, is often a time when you have the most leverage to gain, or regain, your spiritual perspective. Your longing for something can be used as fuel, as motivation to correct the situation. The feeling of lack or emptiness can be used like a compass, pointing out where you might make better choices. The "Gee, I wish!"es and "Why can't I?"s can be used to skillfully carve away what you are from what you think you are. The first hint is that the greatest inner barrier to manifesting what you want is not the lack of wanting it. It is not the old tapes you have about money or wealth or greed. It probably isn't lack of techniques or methodologies. It isn't your fate or karma or some other ancient Cosmic Bank withdrawal of "brownie points" you're still paying back. It isn't even lack of vision. It's the fear of receiving. When you are receiving from someone or something, you are not in control. The ones who are giving are exercising their choice; you have to respond to whatever they present you, not something you already know you have chosen. Receiving demands a surrender. If you are insecure, especially if you are insecure about your deservability, this can seem chancy at best. If you frightened off before by the challenge and costs of receiving hidden freight with ostensible gifts, receiving freely can seem impossible. Often, you have to re-learn how to receive. There are practical solutions for this that won't involve lengthy therapy. One is to remember that only you can really give yourself the full power of choice. This means not only to allow yourself the right to refuse, the right to protect yourself, but to choose how you react. This power of choice is very useful in this Western culture especially, because when too many of you are given gifts you feel automatically obligated, whether to return in kind, to receive the gift in the spirit in which it is given (even if it is something meant to hurt you), or to act towards the gift and the giver in a certain, expected manner. When we're talking about expectations, we're not talking about receiving with gratitude. It was not until mercantilistic attitudes formed in your culture and others that gratitude became a kind of repayment to the giver, to be demanded for services rendered as money must be. Natural, meaning spontaneous, gratitude should not spring from obligation. Especially now that the spiritual aspects of your beings are coming in to play in your lives much more than has been in the recent past, gratitude is a way of acknowledging and honoring your own part in the greater interplay of your life. It is a way to become aware of your wholeness by keeping the natural cyclic flow of influx and efflux. In short, gratitude keeps you from stagnating. But both your experiences in this culture and your past-life memories make you aware how entangled the act of receiving can be. Many of you see the motives behind some kinds of giving all too clearly. Many of you, when you were growing up, had very little experience with "unfreighted" giving. You were given gifts to "make" you do something. You were given gifts and expected to flatter others with your thanks (instead of freely expressing your delight in the enjoyment of what you were given). You were given gifts to buy your love. Growing up, you were given love with needs in it. You were given love in order to make you love back, to fill some unmet need of the giver. No wonder you've shied away from receiving! No wonder you, the child, and you, the spiritual being, who both remember what unconditional love and free receiving mean, drew back from these distortions and confusions. But none of you could draw back from the distortions completely. So some of you learned that the way to overcome them was simply not to receive. But this has many consequences of its own, often carried through several lifetimes. Some of you learned this kind of unreceptive independence with such a vengeance that you later went out of your way to find difficult environments that were empty of love, where your needs weren't met, or at the very least your desires were not. Why? Because it seemed better that you have no love at all than a love which meant to extract from you what you could not give: someone else's self-love or self esteem. Not to receive at all is a way of controlling the receiving process, though a very painful one. Some of you solved the conorundrum of your culture's beliefs and distortions about receiving by learning how to do nothing but give. This is another method of control, which works rather better, as it is so lauded by your culture. It's harder for someone else to give you something you don't want if you're busying your hands (and hers) with your gifts to her! However, the quote, "It is more blessed to give than receive," should more likely read, "The one who has abundance can bless by giving." The one who has more, has more to give. You cannot give out of an empty cup without tainting the gift yet again with the same ulterior motives and needs you yourselves were presented with. When you give from emptiness you have to be saying, "Receive this and give me back what I cannot give myself." Another way of not receiving is though the feeling of entitlement. The attitude of entitlement -- the demand to be served, to be slaved to, to be fulfilled in every ego's whim, to take things for granted -- is another way of controlling, not receiving. Often those who act the most entitled, who act as though the Universe owed them, are at depth the most empty, the most unhappy. Demanding to be served, to have your whims fulfilled, is a way of abdicating the process of giving and receiving to your egos. (As mentioned elsewhere, egos are ill-equipped for the task of living your life for you, despite their loudest protestations to the contrary.) But at least you're not the ones who are having to deal with receiving. Better even the most screwed-up life than that particular terror! You have every right to be cautious in giving or receiving -- BUT ONLY AS LONG AS YOUR POWER OF CHOICE IS COMPROMISED BY THE LIMITS OF YOUR BELIEFS. The notion of being a victim is the same as saying "I am powerless to choose." The notion of powerlessness demeans and cripples your strength, keeping you mesmerized in the surface illusions of life rather than working from your own Divine center of power. Your leftover sense of childhood dependence keeps you from acting with your natural human sense of authority, which means to live in the states of excellence and knowing, and to act in truth. All these distortions are based on a misperception: the misunderstanding of the meaning of "gift." To learn to freely receive can take every particle of courage you have. But it may help to know that most of these agonies can be let go when you learn to respect and own your power of choice, of your own human free will. Taking back your power of choice will be fraught with confusion, though, as long as you confuse "responsibility" with "blame." As long as the question "Who's responsible for this?" means "Who can I dump my frustrations on?" neither you nor the injured party are being responsible. When you begin to ask the question, "Who can respond to this need?" you can put the whole matter back into the realm of choice where whatever it is can be dealt with effectively. If you pay attention to the times when you are being responsive, you will probably find that you are acting from the perceptions of your heart. Notice those times. Cultivate them in your mind and memory. Use them to free yourself up from the fear you've believed in, that if you have chosen something you are going to be blamed and punished. Watch yourself choose from your responsiveness. That is your real power. When you want to manifest riches or comfort or love or other abundances in your lives, you sometimes also need to remind yourselves that it is not less spiritual to desire. It is not less spiritual to receive. It is not less spiritual to have. It is not less spiritual to create a comfortable life. But sometimes when one is spiritual, it is harder. Not because the desires of the spirit and the desires of the earth are so at odds (especially not now, when the Piscean dichotomies are giving way to Aquarian unities). It is harder to desire and to receive for some of you because your new spiritual perceptions give you such a fine sense of the consequences. You have all been given tremendous gifts already. You have been given something irreplaceably valuable: your very existence, as a free gift from the Divine. You have been given your bodies from your parents, your life and health and other pleasures from your planet, care and succor and solace from your guides, light and warmth and love from the sun. You cannot possibly return any of it in kind. Indeed, the notion that you must is nothing but a horrible delusion, for which you can forgive yourself right now. The surest and most perfect gift you can give the Divine is the free expression of yourself. The very best gift you can give your parents, whether they themselves are conflicted in their own giving and receiving or not, is your own autonomy. Not just your independence, particularly not in the sense that you beggar yourself from their or anyone else's love in order not to receive poisoned giving. But your autonomy: the strength to receive even that poison, and overcome it. When you realize that you can control receiving, not by giving until you're empty, not by refusing to receive, not by feeling entitled, but by becoming strong in yourself, by taking back your power and awareness of choice, you are free to manifest what you desire. Paradoxically, you become strong by receiving your self from yourself. Especially in this time of the changing Ages, you have to relearn how to receive, and you must start with yourself. You cannot manifest what you want until there is a place for it to exist, a place for it to be received. When you've distorted yourself for tens of years, tens of lifetimes, you can become afraid of kindness. Afraid of love. Afraid especially of Divine love, unconditional love, from whatever apparent source. Why? Because that is the one love you cannot possibly return. You are by your very nature, even in your most refined and splendid state, a conditional creature. You are limited. How can you possibly return unconditional, unlimited love? The paradox is that you can. This is what it means to be human. But the way, the only way, to return this unconditional love to the Divine Being which does not involve guilt or fear or excess freight, is to give this love first to yourself. You cannot manifest what you want until you know what you desire. You cannot know what you desire until you know who is desiring it. You cannot allow the self who is desiring to receive it until you love who you are. To repair this fundamental difficulty in normal times (i.e., not at the great cusp of a New Age), you would generally start with what hurt the least to change. That is, you would start loving yourself again where it was easiest. But now is an accelerated time of inner shifts. It is a time of light-beings falling into the earth-plane in a tumble of delight, a time of old ways cracking apart and things never seen before springing out from the remnants. Time itself is being compressed. It is not so much that you do not have as much time as you used to, but that you have more leverage with the time you do have. The energy within your actions is greater. The effects will be greater as well. Consequently, you should not necessarily begin by loving what is easiest to love in yourself. Begin instead with what is truest. In order to know who you are, to know what you want, and thus to be able to manifest it, you must center your life around what is realest in yourself. One of the best ways you can discover what is truest in yourself is to defocus your ego. Meditate. Go into your garden and attentively contemplate your roses. Do something that you enjoy which demands your full attention. Then ask yourself, "Where do I feel whole? What makes my heart leap with light, reach out with joy?" Give yourself time to discover this. (Part of you will likely be so astonished that you're asking the question that it'll stand there with its metaphysical mouth open, and won't be able to tell you anything until it gets over the shock. Several milliseconds, at least!) When you have learned what that feeling is, then you can look for the secret it holds. Is it some memory, of when you were a child, of when you just WERE? Is it a feeling of your own competence? Your own freedom of being? Your delight in a skill? Find the secret within that precious feeling of whole joy. Then the next time you meditate, or sit in your garden, feel that feeling again. Every time you let yourself feel this joy, every time you re-discover this secret, you are giving it to yourself. Review that memory, working on sound, color, tactile sense, smells, even tastes. Make it a Big Production! Wrap it up in all the good feelings you have, and give it to yourself. Don't worry, you won't have any of the old consequences, because there is no obligation! You are the only one who can truly give yourself unconditional, unfreighted love, because you are the only one who has complete control over the giving and the receiving. It is another paradox. When you try to control things outside of yourself, you usually become very unhappy. When you learn to control your own interactions with yourself, you feel as though you were made out of happiness itself. This is your true nature: happiness. Another method to discover what is true within yourself, one that does not ask that you be in touch with your emotions (which is another problem, needing another solution), is to start with what you want. New house, new car, a vacation? Money, prestige, revenge? Start with the thing you want most. See it clearly. Engage as many senses as you can: sight, hearing, taste, touch. Then ask yourself why you want this. Be absolutely honest with yourself, without judgment, or this will not work. "I want a new car." Why? "'Cause it'll look good." Why? "It's new!" Why? "Because I bought it!" Why? "'Cause I wanted it!" Why? (Don't let yourself wriggle off the hook!) "'Cause I want to show that so-and-so down at the office that he's not so smart." Why? "'Cause he's stupid!" Why? "'Cause he doesn't see what's good in front of him (like for instance myself)!" Why else? (Look for your own answers inside yourself. Don't give someone else's shortcomings, real or imagined, as the reason for your own unhappiness.) "I don't like him. He makes me feel uncomfortable." Why? "When I get near him, I'm afraid." Why? "He's judging me!" Why else? "Because I don't feel adequate." (Ah. Now we're on to something.) And so on, as long as you can bear it. Yes, it'll hurt! Why knows better than your own ego how to use pain against you? That's what you're doing, confronting your ego's obfuscations, the deceptions it uses to keep you from knowing it's running the show. But with this method you will learn your own motives for your wants. Once you learn your own motives for your wants, you will begin to discover your desires. You will have a very different handle on things, a very different set of problems, and probably very different solutions. Rather than figuring out how to impress someone else, you will discover where you need to give to yourself. And the deeper you dig, the closer you get to your real motives, the more likely your solutions will be effective. Yet another method to discover your truth is to use your imagination. Imagine what you want. Think about everything you want. Then imagine you have a magic genie in front of you. make it real. Make it REALLY REAL. There really is a magic genie right there in front of you. He or she can give you three wishes. Only three. Whatever they are, no problem, but only three. You'll have to choose. You'll have to pick those three wishes you want most. And you've got to do it carefully, because it'll really happen. You can ask the genie for advice, if you like. He's had thousands of years of experience with this kind of thing! You can ask this genie what the consequences of your wishes will be. You may be in for some surprising answers! However it is, whatever you've chosen, when you've decided at last, you can take your final three wishes, and live them out in your imagination. Live them honestly and completely. Drive that new car in your mind. Start on Monday, go on to Tuesday, Wednesday, Thursday. After the first few weeks, do you still feel empty, as though something were missing? Live in that new house. After the first several mortgage payments, the broken water main, the termites, do you feel trapped? Or say you want a ton of money. See yourself spending it, hoarding it, using it, giving it away. Have as much fun as you can. Do you still want something more? The degree of your dissatisfaction with these "fulfilled" wishes is the distance between your real desires and your wants. Desires are those things which would feed and heal your soul, those things which represent your unconditional love for yourself. Many wants are veils, covers, over what is real. They take energy away from you. Your desires give you energy, delight you, enchant you, make actions towards their fulfillment easy and possible. There is no judgment against desires. There is none against wants, either, though fulfilling them instead of your true desires can be inefficient. When you have found what is true in yourself, what feeds and heals your soul, then you are in accord with your own intentions. Then you can see, clearly, what steps to take, or if not you can lead yourself to the methods you need. As we said before, this unveiling of yourself can take every bit of courage you have. You'll have to deal with a lot of stuff you'd really rather not. You'll have to take your own power in your hands, sufficient to go against some of your culture's most dearly held myths. One of these myths is that it is wrong, selfish, to give love to yourself. That you are capable of giving -- indeed you are obligated to give! -- someone else their love of self, their self-esteem. That what you want is what you desire. In other words, the thing that would feed your ego will feed your soul. That you cannot want your own splendor, your own excellence, because there is no splendor, there is no excellence. That no one can act as he desires because it is too costly. It is costly, true enough. But only to those ego-driven belief systems that demand obligation, that want to usurp your native power. When you have given someone or something else the power to make you happy, you have given up your power. When others have your self-esteem under their control, both you and they are burdened. It is not costly to the world at large for you to fulfill that which you have uncovered through your work as that which truly feeds your soul. When you have uncovered your motives, you can start to work with your self and your own energies, and not against them. When you have discovered your truest desires, you will be able to stand clear of the ego. When you are face to face with your soul, then you can begin to understand the true meaning of the word "gift." The more clarity you can uncover, the deeper the understanding you can use, the more you will be able to receive. To receive your happiness from yourself is to give your own being back to yourself, which you gave away because of misunderstanding. Love and blessings, Obehon PLAYTIME -- MANIFESTING WHAT YOU WANT 1: Choose something useful that you already have that you enjoy or use a lot -- your desk, your favorite chair, your shoes. If you can, lie down somewhere so that you can view the object or objects upside-down. (Don't strain.) Consider what went into this object, whether wood, or leather, or cloth, whatever. Consider how each part is made, how the wood was found as a tree, cut down, seasoned, trimmed, shaped, sanded, assembled. How the leather was made by the animal and then given as a gift, to be cured, processed, stained perhaps, cut, shaped, put together. Or how the cotton for your favorite shirt was grown, picked, cleaned, dyed, spun, sewn together. Now think: "All these things have come together in the right place at the right time for me to love and enjoy. The universe must be on my side: it works with my desires in hundreds of ways. Thank you, favorite thing, for coming together for me and being in my life right now when I need you." 2: Choose another of your favorite things, and pretend you live there. Pretend it is your whole universe, the Universe of Desk, the Universe of Shoe. Feel mighty fine as you play in your universe (as well you should). Make it as big and as vast as forever. Then think: "I am not inside this universe. This universe is inside of me. I am larger than all my universe." Then bring your consciousness back to its usual self. 3: Imagine you can create anything you want, like a magician, with a wave or two of your hand. Choose something to create, and do it meticulously, with great care. Pay attention to details as you weave your magic incantations. Play with this thing, enjoy it. Then think: "This, too, is mine if I want it. If it is not in my life now, still it is a part of me. If it is not in my life now, I have not chosen it, or it has not chosen me." Then if you can, let it tell you how to make it real. If you cannot "hear" it, tell it to show you. Even if you don't see or hear anything right away, you will get an answer. 4: Pick the most beautiful thing you know, and look at it or imagine it. Say to yourself, "If this were not within me, I would not see it outside of me. It is all right to own my own beauty." Pick the strongest thing you know, the tides of the sea, the light of the sun, the gravity of Mother Earth. Say to yourself, "If this were not within me, I would not feel it outside of me. It is all right to own my own strength." Do this with as many qualities as occur to you. You don't have to have any expectations with this exercise: your heart will feel better anyway. And when your heart feels better, you will give yourself more. Obehon ... From "Spirit Speaks" magazine -- Obehon and Francesca ___ Blue Wave/QWK v2.12 --- GEcho 1.02+ * Origin: AWARENET INTERNATIONAL 1-303-377-1963 Denver,Co (111:111/0)

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