Letting Go of Attachments Do not pursue conditioned existence; Do not abide in acceptance

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                       Letting Go of Attachments
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        Do not pursue conditioned existence;
        Do not abide in acceptance of emptiness.

 People can be attached either to existence, the outer world, or
 emptiness, the inner void. Most of us are probably attached to
 existence, clinging to our thoughts, our body, the environment around
 us. On the other hand, someone attached to emptiness may think: "Since
 there is nothing after death, it is the simplest solution for
 everything. After I die, I won't have to worry about anything anymore."
 Another emptiness attitude may be: "Since the world is illusory, then
 nothing matters and I can stay detached from everything." Those who are
 attached to emptiness may have a devil-may-care attitude. They may
 refuse to take anything in life seriously. Or they may even be
 susceptible to committing suicide.

 Attachment to either existence or to emptiness are improper attitudes.
 I have spoken of the dangers of attaching to existence -- grasping what
 you like and rejecting what you dislike. But to say that there is
 nothing to grasp and nothing to reject is also incorrect -- this would
 be attaching to emptiness. A person may be meditating with a blank
 mind, apparently free of all thoughts and concerns. While this may seem
 to be approaching enlightenment, it is actually quite different. In the
 enlightened state, a previous thought did not arise, a future thought
 will not arise, and a present thought does not arise. But someone in
 the blank state is just sitting there not thinking about or doing
 anything. In fact, he is not practicing. Indeed he does have a thought,
 which is: the previous thought arose, but it does not matter. A future
 thought may arise but, again, it does not matter. As to the present
 thought, let it be. This person may think that he has no attachment to
 his thoughts. But actually this is far from a true state of
 enlightenment. This kind of state is called "stubborn emptiness," as
 opposed to true emptiness, which is a lively state of mind, full of
 awareness.

 If you practice to a point where you feel very tranquil, stable, and
 comfortable, that would be  a peaceful state of mind. The best you can
 attain in this peaceful condition is a high samadhi state in the
 formless realm called the "emptiness samadhi." But if you become
 attached to such a state you would never see your self- nature. This
 would be considered an "outer path" practice.


        In oneness and equality,
        Confusion vanishes of itself.

 Perceiving that all is one means making no distinction between sage and
 sentient being, or between subject and object. This is another way of
 describing the totality of space. When you experience everything as
 equal, all distinctions will naturally disappear. While remembering not
 to abide either in existence or emptiness, you should also know that
 existence and emptiness are not separate.

 Yet is everything really the same? Once I said that the Buddha sees all
 sentient beings as the same, and is aware of every single thought in
 the universe. Someone raised the point that if the Buddha's mind was
 constantly being bombarded with such a tremendous influx of thoughts,
 it would not be a very comfortable state. This would mean that the
 Buddha's mind is like a garbage can and the thoughts of all sentient
 beings are being dumped into it. It would be a heavy burden on the
 Buddha.

 If you take a snapshot with a high quality camera, everything in front
 of the lens will be imprinted on the film in minute detail. You can see
 the tip of each blade of grass and the outline of every leaf. Yet the
 camera does not think: "How annoying!  All this junk is trying to get
 my attention." No. In one shot, it takes in everything without making
 distinctions among the objects -- whether they are good or bad, long or
 short, green or yellow. But just because the camera does not make
 distinctions does not mean that the images on the film will appear
 confused or in the wrong order. On the contrary, everything is there
 clearly, and in place.

 The Buddha's mind is like this. Having an equal mind means that there
 is no conception of relativity between things. Everything is absolute
 in the sense that there is no separation between you and others,
 between past and future. Because you see everything as equal, you would
 not choose one thing over another. Yet as soon as there are no longer
 any differences, it is as if existence simply disappears. For example,
 if everybody were male, the label "men" would no longer be meaningful,
 since its only purpose is to distinguish men from women. Everyone being
 the same, there would be no need for names. If you take an equal
 attitude towards everything, all differences will disappear, along with
 existence itself.

 Once I handed the incense board to a student and asked him, "What is
 this?" He grabbed the board and shook it a few times. He did that
 because there was no name for it. We may call it an incense board but
 this is only our mind making distinctions. Why must we call it "incense
 board"?

 During a retreat, I stood in front of a certain person. I asked him,
 "Who is standing in front of you?"  He replied, "An egg." I was very
 pleased to be an egg.

 When the retreat was over, I asked him, "Why is Shih-fu an egg?" He
 answered, "When Shih-fu asked me the question I did not have any
 thought whatsoever in my mind. Since I had to give an answer, I just
 said something -- and the word "egg" spontaneously came out of my
 mouth. Later I thought: `That isn't quite right. How can Shih-fu be an
 egg? But I said it and it's said.'"

 When he said "an egg," it was the correct answer. In fact, whatever he
 said at that moment would have been correct because he did not have any
 thought in his mind. He was in an absolute state, not making any
 distinctions. But once he began to entertain doubts, he lost the
 answer.

 Perhaps in this retreat I will also stand in front of you and ask, "Who
 is standing in front of you?"  Then, recalling the story I have just
 told, you may try to give a similar answer and call Shih-fu a horse.
 However, this would not be correct if you have the idea of giving a
 good answer. This is the mind of distinction. It is not the mind that
 treats everything as equal.


        Stop activity and return to stillness,
        And that stillness will be even more active.

 Originally your mind may be in a relatively stable state. But when you
 realize that your mind is not completely unmoving, you may try to make
 it even calmer. However, the effort to still your mind will cause it to
 become more active. The mind that makes no distinctions is unmoving;
 there are no ups and downs. If you try to eliminate the ups and downs
 it would be like observing a pan of water. There are gentle ripples on
 its surface.  But you want the surface to be completely still, so you
 blow on the water to flatten it out. This creates more ripples. Then
 you press the water with your hands to stop it from moving. The outcome
 is even more agitation. If you were to leave the water alone, the
 ripples would eventually subside and the surface would be still. Common
 sense tells us that we cannot force the water to become calm. When it
 comes to practice, however, it is difficult for us to apply the same
 principle.

 When practicing, it is sufficient to just keep your mind on the method.
 It is unnecessary to reflect upon how well you are doing, or to compare
 whether you are in a better state now than you were half an hour ago.
 During the evening talk, I may ask you, "How are you doing today?" At
 this time you are allowed to express your feelings. But when you are
 practicing you should definitely not investigate your mental state and
 judge your practice.

 Someone said to me, "Shih-fu, I feel very ashamed. I come to retreat
 time and again and yet I never make any progress." I said, "The very
 fact that you are still coming to retreat and practicing is proof that
 you are making progress."

 Practice with an equal mind and don't distinguish between good and bad.
 Do not compare your condition before and after the retreat, or judge
 whether the method you are using is right or wrong. If you find you
 cannot use the method, you may change it, but first understand why you
 cannot use the method. You should not let curiosity dictate your
 practice, playing with one method today and another tomorrow, or
 switching methods from one sitting to the next. You should see that
 there are no real differences between the various methods. Hold on to
 one method and go into it as deeply as possible.

 This is like your love relationships. When you love someone, you should
 persist in that relationship and not continually change partners.
 Likewise, keep to one method and do not keep changing your conception
 of practice. To change frequently will give you only trouble.


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