By: Hector Plasmic
To: Michael Hardy
Re: Re: evidence
MH>And we have evidence that Jesus rose from the dead.
Time: Here and now.
Surviving members of David Koresh's Branch Davidians report seeing David
the Koresh, Lamb of God, alive and preaching. They're widely regarded
The Enquirer and similar yellow tabloids pick up the tale and begin
printing stories about people seeing the Koresh hither and yon
performing miracles. The stories are widely regarded as garbage --
except for a few ignorant souls who also believe Elvis and JFK are still
A few years pass, the stories of Koresh sightings still crop up from
time to time. Henry Kissinger has died, and John Prewett committed
suicide rather than admit he was a false prophet. The Branch Davidians
stick to their story, saying that the Koresh has ascended to heaven to
be with God. They pick up followers. The church grows slowly but
steadily. People still think they're nuts, but a few eyebrows are being
raised. The fundamentalist xtian televangelists begin screaming about
false prophets and followers of the devil when they mention the
A few more years pass. Most of the Branch Davidians have died of old
age. Their followers, still growing, set down the tales they've been
told about the Koresh's sacrificial death to atone for the sins of
mankind and subsequent resurrection and ascension to heaven and begin
calling themselves Koreshians. A prominent televangelist who'd been
preaching against the Koreshians is in an automobile accident; when he
recovers, he claims to have seen the Koresh and been converted (saved).
He tours the country preaching at Koreshian churches, howls his message
over the airwaves. Membership in the Church of Koresh jumps sharply as
many people leave the fundamentalist churches to become Koreshians.
A few more years pass. The televangelist, now an old man, is
assassinated. Membership again jumps sharply, spurred by his martyrdom.
The stories set down years before are assembled and appended to the King
James bible (oddly, written using "thee" and "thou"s). The stories
contain contradictions and obvious fallacies, but they're accepted as
dogma by the Koreshians, who interpret over them and/or call them "proof
of the truth of the writings."
Approximately two thousand years pass -- it's 1995 AK (After Koresh).
The Koreshian religion is held, at least superficially, by 1/3rd of the
world's 10 billion population (there'd be a lot more people, but the
Koreshians exterminated a lot of heretics and unbelievers over a
thousand years before during the Second Dark Age). Mikey Hardy's
descendant says, in a room full of atheists, "And we have evidence that
David Koresh rose from the dead."
Most everyone present considers him a nut, and farts in his general
direction. Mikey's descendant screams "IS NOT!"