By: DAVID RICE Re: Cult Laugh-in Subject: Anti-Scn Jokes on +quot;Nightstand+quot; Date: 7

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By: DAVID RICE Re: Cult Laugh-in From: (Merchant of Chaos) Subject: Anti-Scn Jokes on "Nightstand" Date: 7 Dec 1995 07:25:12 GMT This past weekend, the talk-show spoof "Nightstand" did a "cult show." For those of you unfamiliar with the show, it is set up to look like a typical daytime talk show...only all the participants are actors, and the lines are scripted. The only "real" people are the studio audience members, but even some of them are actors who have been planted there to ask phony questions. The host of the show is "Dick Dietrick" played by Timothy Stack. The topic of last week's show was "cults" and it was HYSTERICAL!!! They promised to look at "both sides of cults----the kooks who join them and the wackos who start them!" The show opened with a female "cult member" from a fictitious group called "The Children of Yerri." After she began speaking in a typical cult jargon, Dick Deitrick complained, "I have to get me an English-to-Yerri Dictionary!" Then they brought out the cult leader, and it was quickly revealed that he had his female followers engaging in prostitution. (This show always has to go for the "sex" angle!) The funniest part was when the former cult member, who was silhouetted behind a screen because she supposedly wanted her identity concealed, began speaking. In order to disguise her voice, she preceded each comment she made by sucking the air out of a helium balloon! This shtick had me rolling on the floor!!!! In the next segment, they brought out a "deprogrammer" who immediately announced that his "organization" is "conveniently located across the street from $cientology centers around the country." This prompted wild laughter and applause from the studio audience!!! The deprogrammer then explained the warning signs of being in a of which was "You find yourself at more than one party with Tom Cruise." In the show's final segment, they introduced somebody who had supposedly been "successfully deprogrammed". The guy spoke with exactly the same mannerisms and tone of voice as the deprogrammer, which shows that the folks at "Nightstand" are determined to make fun of BOTH sides of every issue. Finally, they brough the cult member's mother, who after yelling at the cult leader, found herself captivated by his charm. By the end of the episode, the mother, the deprogrammer, the deprogrammed former cult member, and the host, Dick Dietrick, were all singing together on stage, while the other former member, the one who wanted her identity kept secret, ran out from behind the screen and attacked the cult leader. (Every episode of this show usually ends with some sort of fistfight.) The woman was dragged off the set screaming and yelling, and it reminded me of the Geraldo show fiasco of 1991, when Scientologists were so successful at taking over the show, that a stunned Steve Hassan and Monica Pignotti were left screaming and yelling backstage. The show was very funny, and the jokes were quite clever. It was obvious that the writers of the show were well educated about cults, because you have to have knowledge about a topic in order to make fun of it that well. My favorite one-liner from the show was when the host said to the cult member: "I'm not laughing *at* you. I'm laughing *for* you." If I hear that the show is going to be repeated, I'll let you know. ... "God never intended Christians to be fools." -- "Kato" * * Origin: "And furthermore, 'Don't call me brother.'" (1:124/9005)


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