By: Norbert Sykes To: Brad Jackson _ _ Brad Jackson All : Doctrine BJ Greetings! BJ I was

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By: Norbert Sykes To: Brad Jackson \_|_|||||||||| __|_ / |||| ||| Brad Jackson > All : Doctrine BJ> Greetings! BJ> I was give this track yesterday by a very good friend BJ> out-lining the: BJ> The Apostle's Doctrine Do you need track lighting to read it? And why do you call the guy a friend? And aren't we pleased to hear all about this? BJ> (Luke 24:46 KJV) And said unto them, Thus it is written, and thus it BJ> behoved Christ to suffer, and to rise from the dead the third day: Like bread dough? BJ> (Luke 24:47 KJV) And that repentance and remission of sins should be BJ> preached in his name among all nations, beginning at Jerusalem. Jerusalem's a nation? BJ> (Luke 24:48 KJV) And ye are witnesses of these things. I never saw a thing. BJ> (Luke 24:49 KJV) And, behold, I send the promise of my Father upon BJ> you: but tarry ye in the city of Jerusalem, until ye be endued with BJ> power from on high. Does one get endued with a glue gun or an endue gun? I'd rather be endowed . . . BJ> (Acts 1:8 KJV) But ye shall receive power, after that the Holy Ghost BJ> is come upon you: and ye shall be witnesses unto me both in Jerusalem, BJ> and in all Judaea, and in Samaria, and unto the uttermost part of the BJ> earth. The Holy Ghost better not come upon me; I'll kick the sheet out of him. I think the uttermost part of the earth is probably, from Jerusalem, Hoboken. BJ> (Acts 2:38 KJV) Then Peter said unto them, Repent, and be baptized BJ> every one of you in the name of Jesus Christ for the remission of BJ> sins, and ye shall receive the gift of the Holy Ghost. . . . a lovely home version of the game . . . BJ> (Acts 4:12 KJV) Neither is there salvation in any other: for there is BJ> none other name under heaven given among men, whereby we must be BJ> saved. So how many men do you know that are named YHVH? BJ> (Gal 1:9 KJV) As we said before, so say I now again, If any man BJ> preach any other gospel unto you than that ye have received, let him be BJ> accursed. Now, don't bring Assmotrin into this . . . BJ> (Eph 2:20 KJV) And are built upon the foundation of the apostles and BJ> prophets, Jesus Christ himself being the chief corner stone; I like the idea of the apostles, prophets, and JC himself being in the foundation, along with assorted mobsters and union leaders like Jimmy Hoffa. I just didn't know the Jews worked with cement, though I was aware of the fact that the Romans used a kind of cement. Perhaps we could consider this a Xtian time-capsule. No wonder the body was never found. I do know that two of Jesus's contemporaries were named Rocky and The Knife (Paul and Judas). BJ> (1 Tim 1:3 KJV) As I besought thee to abide still at Ephesus, when I BJ> went into Macedonia, that thou mightest charge some that they teach no BJ> other doctrine, Holy MasterCard? BJ> (2 Tim 3:16 KJV) All scripture is given by inspiration of God, and is BJ> profitable for doctrine, for reproof, for correction, for instruction BJ> in righteousness: . . . heck, just profitable in general, isn't it? BJ> I would like to thank that friend that passed this track to me, and BJ> the people that wrote it. Okay, which one of us supposedly gave you this tract? BJ> May God Bless them both! BJ> Brad Ohhhhh Bra-ad, Oh, Janet! ... Brad's not the sharpest tool in the shed. \_|_|||||||||| __|_ / |||| ||| Brad Jackson > All : Baptism BJ> Greetings! Hiya, Brad! BJ> Many false preachers (accursed of God) teach that baptism is merely BJ> "An outward profession of inward faith" or some such nonsense... BJ> It is a lie from the very pits of hell, a trick of the devil to BJ> keep people in their sins. Water baptism is the re-birth of Water BJ> referred to in John 3:5. I make water all the time, so I know what you mean. BJ> Mark 16:16 He that believeth and is baptized shall be saved; but he BJ> that believeth not shall be damned. My dog doesn't believe. Out, damned Spot! BJ> Acts 2:38 Then Peter said unto them, Repent, and be baptized every one BJ> of you in the name of Jesus Christ for the remission of sins, and ye BJ> shall receive the gift of the Holy Ghost. Couldn't they just get chemotherapy? BJ> Acts 2:41 Then they that gladly received his word were baptized: and BJ> the same day there were added [unto them] about three thousand souls. Ah, collecting souls for fun and profit. Many of them are valuable . . . BJ> Acts 10:45 And they of the circumcision which believed were BJ> astonished, as many as came with Peter, because that on the Gentiles BJ> also was poured out the gift of the Holy Ghost. What was astonishing it that they'd allow their winkies to get whacked like that! Ow! BJ> Acts 10:46 For they heard them speak with tongues, and magnify God. Warning, Gods in the Rear View Mirror may appear larger than they are . . . BJ> Then answered Peter, BJ> Acts 10:47 Can any man forbid water, that these should not be BJ> baptized, which have received the Holy Ghost as well as we? Forbid water? What if you're thirsty? How about Kool-Aid? I bet that's why the Church is loosing members all the time (no snide remarks, now!) . . . it's because they don't have a Kool-Aid baptism. Look how Jim Jones made out with grape Kool-Aid . . . BJ> Acts 10:48 And he commanded them to be baptized in the name of the BJ> Lord. Then prayed they him to tarry certain days. I hate the smell of hot tarry. Gravel doesn't bother me much, though. BJ> Acts 19:4 Then said Paul, John verily baptized with the baptism of BJ> repentance, saying unto the people, that they should believe on him BJ> which should come after him, that is, on Christ Jesus. Jesus came AFTER John? Good, then they were both satisfied, right? How considerate of JC . . . BJ> Acts 19:5 When they heard [this], they were baptized in the name of BJ> the Lord Jesus. . . . a lot more etherial than water . . . BJ> Acts 22:16 And now why tarriest thou? arise, and be baptized, and wash BJ> away thy sins, calling on the name of the Lord. BJ> ** Sins are washed away in Jesus' name baptism ** But does he get out those stubborn skid marks? BJ> Romans 6:3 Know ye not, that so many of us as were baptized into Jesus BJ> Christ were baptized into his death? Ooops, just talked _me_ out of it. Did you mean the baptismee's death, or JC's? If you meant JC, it won't matter, you can't kill the Jewish Terminator . . . BJ> Galatians 3:27 For as many of you as have been baptized into Christ BJ> have put on Christ. But where do you get shoes to match?

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