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Xref: helios.physics.utoronto.ca alt.sex:125102 alt.answers:1835 news.answers:18256 Path: homer.cs.mcgill.ca!superdj From: superdj@binkley.cs.mcgill.ca (David Johnson) Newsgroups: alt.sex,alt.answers,news.answers Subject: [alt.sex] FAQ (2/4) Followup-To: alt.sex Date: 15 Feb 1994 04:50:29 GMT Organization: SOCS - McGill University, Montreal, Canada Lines: 982 Approved: news-answers-request@MIT.Edu Expires: 5 Apr 1994 Message-ID: <2jpkal$n77@homer.cs.mcgill.ca> NNTP-Posting-Host: binkley Summary: frequently asked questions for alt.sex Keywords: Parts c3-3 to c3-6. Originator: superdj@binkley.cs.mcgill.ca Originator: superdj@binkley.cs.mcgill.ca Archive-name: alt-sex/faq/part2 Last-modified: 14 Feb 1994 c3-3. What should I do to make (the first attempt at) anal sex easiest? Compiled, edited, and reorganized by adchen@phoenix.princeton.edu with material from (stsou@hpcupt1.cup.hp.com (Sharon Tsou), KAT, clw5@po.CWRU.Edu (Christopher L. Wood), kwatsi@athena.mit.edu (Atomic Playboy), and rpeck@jessica.stanford.edu (Raymond Peck) STRETCH FIRST The key to attempting anal sex is two-fold: stretching exercises and relaxation. This is to accomplish two things: 1) to get your virgin ass used to something inside it, and 2) to get your ass used to something as large as your partner's cock. Stretching exercises will give you a chance to learn the needed relaxation for the first attempt. The faster you learn to relax the muscles involved, the easier it will be. You can use either a dildo or fingers for the stretching exercises. USING A DILDO These are available at just about every adult bookstore and many mail-order places (see questions c2-7 and c2-10). Once you get one, you should just practice using it. You'll probably find it easier to at least use some lubricant, at least on the first couple inches of it (more on this later), as well as on your asshole, and a little inside your anus. This is to make the penetration much easier. The actual penetration of the head of the penis is probably the most difficult part, which is why a dildo is more realistic, and you should most likely spend a fair amount of time getting used to it. This can either be just inserting it up to the head, then pulling it out and putting it in again, or completely inserting it, and then removing it. You should do it enough until you get to the point where you feel pretty comfortable with it. (Well, as comfortable as it can be). There are two steps to practice insertion with the dildo. First, you want to insert it the "normal" way, moving and rotating the dildo around to find the most comfortable position for you. Do it this way, so that you know which ways are more acceptable, and which ways are more difficult or feel a bit painful. When you have this down, you want to repeat the "exercise", only now trying to keep the dildo as stationary as possible, moving your ass and body to facilitate its entry. This is a better simulation of when he really tries to penetrate you, because (especially if you're on the bottom and he's on the top) you really can't expect to be able to reach around and move his cock to where you want it. You're going to have to be able to adjust your body to his thrusts. I really can't tell you the best way to do this, although doing it in whatever position you expect to be in with him (on your stomach or back, for example) would probably be the best way to also practice it. USING FINGERS All you need are your or your partner's fingers. Of course, you can't have long nails. You start out by slowly pushing one well- lubricated finger (index is best and hand lotion or vaginal juices work fine). Slowly move this in and out, gradually pressing more against the walls of the anus. Since an "anal virgin" will probably be nervous about this, his/her anal muscles will tend to contract, causing pain. So it helps if he/she/you (I'll use 'she' from now on) reads, listens to music, or masturbates so her mind will be off her anus. After the muscles loosen up, put another finger in along with the first, and then keep moving them the same way. Eventually, add a third, and, usually, by the time you can put four fingers in comfortably, an average sized penis should be able to fit (although keep in mind most penises are *longer* than fingers, so you may not be able to push it in as far). THE REAL THING USE A CONDOM AND LUBRICANT When the time comes that you do have anal sex with him, I would recommend having a condom. I think we all know the potential dangers of sex (especially anal sex) when not using one, so there's no real explanation needed. They also help reduce the mess (although if you go to the bathroom before this, and wash your ass with a wet rag, the inside of your rectum will be quite clean, and you should be able to put a finger in it without it picking up any solid particles), and you can have anal sex with a condom on, then pull off the condom and have vaginal sex. Remember to urinate before getting buttfucked, because this position puts pressure on the bladder. The next item is a good lubricant. I always use it with my one inch thick dildo, so I have to think you would definitely need to use some with a much larger real cock. While Vaseline is okay to use when practising yourself, it is unacceptable to use when using a condom, since it will start to break the latex down. KY is usually the preferred choice. Lube up both the outside of the anus and the penis shaft (very important!). Any lubricant that is condom compatible is ok, that means water-based. So do not use vaseline, baby oil, or cold cream. Use KY Jelly, AstroGlide, HR, or PrePair. PrePair is a good one because it contains nonoxynyl-9, which is a spermicide that also can kill many bacteria. Spit is also a viable lubricant, provided that you keep replenishing it. It evaporates more readily than other lubricants, especially during lengthy (ho ho) sessions, so you'll have to be aware. GOING FOR IT: take it *slow* Okay, now that we've got the preparatory details out of the way, it's time to enter. You should proceed VERY slowly. Place the head of your penis against the anus, and then, apply a SMALL amount of pressure so that the penis enters very slowly. It is important to maintain control on entry because if you apply too much pressure and the anal muscles just 'give way' it could hurt like hell. Once you two become accustomed to doing this, it will become much easier. Getting inside may take anywhere from 15 seconds to 15 minutes. Don't be impatient! If you push too hard or go too fast, you can tear her. This isn't really serious, but it'll surely end your fun for the day! She may want you to ease up on the pressure at times to allow her body to get used to the opening. When she gives you the go-ahead, it often helps to do a bit of short stroking, starting with ~1/8" and going to maybe 1". When you start to slide inside, she will most likely open up and relax better. Don't start out thrusting, just gently move back and forth, or just get it inside and rest it there until she's used to it. This is the most important part for her comfort and pleasure. Basically, you apply a bit of pressure, and as she relaxes she will let you in. Sometimes the act of her "pushing out" (like defecating) will relax her sphincter. After you become more used to it, a slight (~ 1/4") pumping of the pressure will let her open up faster. Sometimes she will find it painful for you to go in all the way: it's similar to hitting the cervix. Don't go in all the way! Just be very gentle at bottom of the stroke 'till it eases up. After a while, if she is properly relaxed, you should not need to be gentle: you can pump away with mad abandon. In fact, some find this most stimulating. I pump all the way in, and then all the way out, pulling completely out of her for a moment (although not too long, 'cause she'll start to contract right away). OTHER STUFF Never switch orifices (i.e. going from anal to vaginal play) without carefully washing with soap and water. Bacteria from the colon can cause nasty vaginal infections. If you are using sex toys (dildos or anal plugs) cover it with a condom first, so you can simply pull off the condom and put on a fresh one to use on another orifice or another partner, provided that you don't have contaminated lubricant oozing all over the place. You may or may not be need some type of pillow. This is basically to prop under the ass or lay under the stomach to make the angle of penetration a little easier. Whether you need this will depend on where you have sex (it may be impractical to bring one, or the positioning may be good enough already). If you are into learning from pornography (and if you just want a good laugh ;-)) I would suggest that you check out Hollywood Video's "The Best of Caught From Behind: Part II". It's very pornographic, very informative, and very funny. It's up to you though. POSITIONS As for positions, it's usually easiest for insertion (unless she's *really* excited!) in the spoon position. This also gives you access to easily stimulate her in other ways. Be careful not to transfer anything from the anal region to the vagina: this can cause infections. I usually keep a set of fingers or a hand "clean" for this purpose. This is also, of course, important for non-intercourse anal stimulation, such as cunnilingus with some fingers rubbing, some inside her vagina, and some in her anus. Keep those fingers partitioned! We usually switch to "on the knees-face in the pillow, her pressing hard on her clit and pubic bone", to avoid severe abrasion burns! ;-) Spoon position allows her more control over initial insertion, while the other, well, it has its own advantages! The other positions, after initial insertion, to face-to-face, with her legs on my shoulders. This really allows some serious depth. The position depends largely on how well you two fit together. If you are tall and if your SO is short, you might want to try having her lie flat on her stomach. You could also have her lie on her back with her knees drawn up. In this situation, it might be a good idea to place a pillow under her buttocks (depending on what the two of you like). If dimensional factors permit, she could also be on her hands and knees. ------------------------------------------ c3-4. How does one give a hand job? How to Give the Perfect Hand Job by Brooks Peters Sex means more than intercourse; exploring all the different variations enhances your sex life and keeps it from getting stale. Masturbating your partner can be very exciting for both of you. So, read on and learn how to let your fingers do the walking. Mutual masturbation can be a thrilling experience, but first, we need to study the basics of manual technique. Most men feel women aren't skilled at handling penises. Their grips are too limp, lacking conviction and exuberance. They seem afraid to apply pressure, yet often pull or tug at inappropriate moments, disrupting the rhythm. They also have a tendency to scratch. Clearly, we all need to be more knowledgeable about the proper methods of mutual masturbation. Either you or your partner can perform the following exercises. But it is written with an experienced woman in mind. The first concern is always a matter of size. Is it large or small? Somewhere in between? No issue has ever received greater attention than the size of a man's penis. Man's obsession with cock size is probably a mental vestige of his primitive primate past, but as far as human sexuality is concerned, it's a waste of time. A large penis doesn't have any effect on a woman's physical enjoyment unless she has a deep-seated psychological attachment to well-endowed men. How about its shape? Is it curved like a boomerang or is it straight like an arrow? Does your fist fit around the spongy mass of the shaft? Does your hand completely engulf it? This is good because you can squeeze it all at once. But don't be an organ grinder. Be gentle, yet firm. If the penis has an unusual girth, your hand may not completely encircle it. In such cases, try both hands to insure you don't miss any of the tender areas while stroking. Explore every square inch of his genital surface area. A man loves to have his penis worshipped, played with, tickled, fondled, massaged. Let him know that you are not afraid, ashamed or disgusted. Don't start stroking or jerking quite yet. Just feel the fullness of it all. Let your fingers run from the balls to the top of the cock head, swirl around there, then slide back down the other half and end back down at the balls. The movements should be swift and smooth, without bumping or stalling. Now you're ready for some stepped-up action, but you don't want to suddenly lapse into a series of beatings, whackings, jackings and jerkings. Tease the more sensitive areas of the penis. These include: the glans and corona, and the tender part of the bottom side of his penis. Bring your palm up to the top of the glans and park it there flat out, fingers held together and stiff, thumb pointed straight out. Spin it around as if you were trying desperately to remove the tight lid of a jar. Your man will be groaning in delicious agony. The glans is super sensitive and this motion will bring him exquisite pleasure. He might grimace and cry out, and probably try to push your hand away, but he's loving every second of it. Now's your chance to be the one who plows ahead even though he's pleading with you to stop! After you've done this for a while, slip your hand down his testicles and ever-so-gently grab them in your fingers, softly tugging them down away from his shaft. If they are big and bulky, like Grade AA eggs, bounce them up and down a couple of times in your hand. Tell him how heavy they feel, how sexy they are. Whatever you do, don't squeeze them! This could put a real damper on your lovemaking for the rest of the day. You might notice that one of his nuts hangs lower than the other. This is perfectly normal. Once you feel comfortable with the way his balls feel in your hand, gently roll them up the underside of his shaft. Depending on their size and the amount of room in the scrotum, they will most likely reach to half way of his penis. He will like the way this feels. Now, let go of his testicles and bring your fingers together in a makeshift goosehead formation. Very lightly, begin to stroke his erection with your fingers, running them all over his sensitive shaft and balls. You may wish to slip the pocket of your goosehead handhold over the tip of his penis, letting it rest there for a few seconds. About this time, the penis will probably start to emit its natural lubricant. Pre-seminal fluid is nature's way of moistening the canal of the urethra so that the spermatozoa can swim more easily out of it; it also lubricates the head of the penis. An uncircumcised penis gathers up this lubricant within the foreskin and keeps the head very moist and slick. Use the juice to lubricate the shaft. Sometimes, its musky smell can be an aromatic aphrodisiac for you both. If there is little or no pre-cum, don't be concerned. It is not a requirement, and it doesn't always appear at exactly the same time. In any case a good lubricant will work just as well. Add a drop of moisturizing lotion to the shaft and gently rub it in. Alexandra Penney, in her book, "How to Make Love to a Man", is very keen on massaging the lotion between one's hands before putting it on the penis because sometimes the cream is cold and the palm-rubbing warms it up. If your partner doesn't seem to have a very firm erection, try using a cinnamon-based ointment which you can find at your local sex novelty store or acquire through a mail catalog. The slight burning sensation often causes the penis to become rock-hard. Adding a little dab to the testicles also helps. If you really want to do a number on him, slip a dollop of Ben-Gay on his balls and watch him go through the roof. One of the secrets of great manual sex is varying your hand motions. Here are a few indispensable techniques: SWITCH HITTER Use both hands, alternating back and forth in a pattern you develop to offer him the most arousal. He will notice the difference. Don't get into a routine where the strokes are dull, and noncommittal. Give it to him good. Get him to the point where he's singing out, "I second that hand motion!" DOUBLE WHAMMY How about going double or nothing! Bring both well-lubricated hands down on his shaft. Some cocks are so big they require both hands. If your partner's doesn't, then use the other hand to caress and lightly flutter his balls, or tighten around the base of his shaft. If both hands fit along the length of the shaft, move then together, up and down, in the typical pumping motion. Pretend you're holding a baseball bat and are about to score a grand slam. You can also vary the directions of your hands, one up, one down at the same time. There's no doubt that two hands are better than one. THE ANVIL STROKE Bring one hand down, letting it stroke the penis from the top all the way to the bottom. When it hits the bottom, release it. Meanwhile you're bringing your corresponding hand down to the top of the shaft, creating an alternating beating motion, hence the name "anvil stroke." Think of those blacksmith duos who keep up a double beat pounding motion as they beat that rod of iron on a piping-hot anvil. THE SHUTTLE COCK Not many people have heard of the "shuttle cock," but it's one of the best. Take the penis in both hands, fingers lightly touching the sides of the shaft. In order to visualize the position, think of yourself holding a clarinet. Now flick the penis back and forth between your two hands by holding on to the loose skin of the shaft. Shuttling it back and forth in this manner may not seem incredibly thrilling to him at first, but pretty soon, as it builds up momentum, it will drive him out of his mind. Orgasms encountered via this method are sometimes messy, but always memorable. THE BOOKENDS Place both of your hands side by side against his shaft like a pair of bookends. Now push hard against his penis. Then lift your hands up and down. Continue in this manner for a while. The constant tugging of the skin around the balls and the mons pubis will do the trick. THE FLAME Place your hands down on either side, your fingers pointing away from the cock. Pretend you're a campfire girl and start spinning his pecker like a stick of wood. This way you'll keep the home fires burning for a long time to come. THE BASE CLUTCH Tighten your thumb and forefinger around the base of the shaft, pressing down on the balls. This will cut off the blood (acting as an impromptu cock ring) and help you steady the shaft in your hand. If the skin on it is slick and immutable, you can stroke the penis with more friction, thereby enhancing the excruciating experience. THE LOVE TUG As you are stroking him, lightly pull on the wispy strands of pubic hair sprouting from his testicles. Don't pull so hard that you remove them, but tease them gently, lovingly. This will make him holler with delight and awe at your inventiveness. THE TWO-TIMER Tickle his balls with one hand while the other jerks him up and down. THE THIGH-SWATTER Use the hand that is currently unemployed to firmly but lovingly pat his inner thighs. BEST FIST FORWARD Place your fist against his perineum as you're stroking him. He'll probably start opening his legs a little wider, giving you more space to press against. Guaranteed to drive him wild. As always, it is the psychological impact of what you are doing that makes the sex so satisfying. Let your mind escape into the uncharted wilderness of fantasy. As a sexual pioneer, it is your manifest destiny to explore the outer limits of your sensuality. From: "The Contrivor" "How to give the perfect handjob" has inspired the following additions. All of the techniques below require good lubrication... Vaseline or alboline are recommended. A fifty/fifty mixture of these two lubricants is excellent. CAVEAT - Never use oil-based lubricants in conjunction with latex protection THE MILKER Opposite of the Anvil - Hands alternate 'milking' up the penis, starting at the base and working all the way up past the tip. THE PERPETUAL PENETRATION Like the Anvil, but rather than just grabbing the penis at the top, let his penis 'penetrate' into your fist on each stroke. Before the head of his penis pops out of your hand, bring the other hand up for the next penetration. This way it seems to him like he is penetrating deeper and deeper into an infinite vagina. Make sure you keep the penetration continuous for best results. Try faster or slower to taste. THE PALM SWIRL - Use your open palm to swirl around the head, the way your tongue would lick an ice cream cone. This sensitizes the head, and will make it get larger and turn (even more) red. Try reversing direction for a surprise. TINY CIRCLES - As in "The Palm Swirl", use your open palm on his glans, but stop at each "hour of the clock", and make circular motions with your open palm. This will make this part of the head EXTREMELY sensitive, so move to the next hour after a few circles. THE RING - Make a ring with your thumb and forefinger, and pump up and down with this ring. When you get to the top, close the ring, then make him squeeze his way in as you slide back down to the bottom. THE DOOR KNOB - Turn the head of his penis like a you're trying to open a door knob coated with grease. It won't turn, but he may flip. Now try turning the other way. Repeat. THE SHAFT - Stroke only his shaft, ignoring the head. You will notice it swelling and turning red. When it's bright red and rock hard, use the Door Knob, the Palm Swirl, or the Perpetual Penetration. THE SPOT PINCH -- Lightly and slowly run a finger up the under side of his cock. Ask him to tell you where the most sensitive spot is. Pinch it, squeeze it, nibble it, tease it. This is a good spot to pinch to turn a soft cock rock solid. ------------------------------------------ c3-5. What is the Venus butterfly? This is allegedly a technique which is supposed to do orgasmic wonders. It was mentioned in an episode of L.A. Law, but of course, was never explained. Some people have suggested a method that might fit the name: Put your palms together, finger to finger, spread your fingers, and insert one pair of fingers into the vagina, another into the anus, plus another pair, stimulating the clitoris. This provides a sort of triple stimulation. ------------------------------------------ c3-6. What is and where is the G-spot? FIRST ARTICLE (Author: unknown) G wiz aka g-spot aka Grafenberg spot Summary: 1) The g-spot exists in all women. 2) sensitivity varies. 3) Reaction/interpretation/openness varies. G-spot IS female analog to prostate. It really does exist. The road map (can by used by a man/woman with a woman partner or a woman on herself). Start from the pubic bone, it is the bone running across the lower end of the abdominal region -- between the thighs and a little above the clitoris and labia. The g-spot is behind this bone -- so you need to find a way around to the other side. Fortunately, there is an alternate approach in women -- up the vagina. The walls of the vagina are somewhat wrinkly, a testimony to how much the vagina can stretch (say to the size of a baby's head). On the forward surface there is a smoother patch in about 2 knuckles (1.5-3 inches, 3.5-7 cm.). If a woman was to lay her palm on top of her clitoris and curl a finger (or fingers) in to the vagina in to a loose clench, the tips would be in the right region. The g-spot is buried under some layers of tissue so it may take some pressure to stimulate this area. Repeating some general hints. Arousal of the g-spot is usually more effective if the woman is already sexually aroused. Sharp or long nails are probably a no-no. Some pressure may be necessary. Two fingers are usually employed -- esp. since few people use mechanical typewriters (which would give fingers strength and endurance). Initial sensations in the woman may be a) discomfort, an urge to urinate (the urethra from the bladder is being stimulated), or a pleasurable sensation. As stimulation continues (few minutes), the g-spot will begin to swell. "Continued stimulation of the area _may_ result in an orgasm that is often quite intense." [see above regarding being sexually aroused -- first. No arousal -- no orgasm]. Ejaculation is possible, but the fluid is different from vaginal secretions and from urine. This does not work for all women. Discuss with your intimates. Compare notes. For some women, this area may receive stimulus in penile- vaginal intercourse given the right angles. Rear entry ("doggie style") may facilitate penile pressure in this region. If the partner you are playing with is a man, you can try for a similar effect on his prostate entering through his anus -- Long or sharp nails are a big NO-NO. You might want to use a glove or condom over fingers. I should not need to say: DO NOT allow fecal material on or around woman's vagina. Note this can actually cause an ejaculation from a man without orgasm or an intense orgasm or something in between or nothing at all. PLEASE: Practice safe sex. No exchange of bodily fluids -- blood, feces (which may contain blood), semen, or female ejaculum; unless you both have been monogamous... SECOND ARTICLE (author: Peter A. Merel) ok, I got a copy of this thing from two different people, and it was the same manual, so I guess this is the authentic one after all. I also received an interesting letter from a girl in California that claimed she had written the g-spot manual. I would leave her address, but she probably wouldn't like that so if you want it, drop me a note and I'll give it to ya. Well, good luck finding it! I know I'll be having some fun tonight! Okay, I've found G-spots in three women of my acquaintance. Two of them were completely delighted with the discovery, and the other one wasn't real crazy about it no matter what. Chacun a son gout. It took some time and patience for one of the delighted ones, but the other delighted one reckoned that she'd hit it by accident a few times and just not known what happened. She responded immediately, and with gusto. Now I guess it's time for sex-ed 101, so listen up all of you who have a sexual interest in female anatomy. The rest of you probably ought to hit 'n' now. 7 will get you 2 that not a single netter hit 'n'. Well, let's start with a nice juicy diagram. You'll have to bear with my ability to render in ASCII. In an ideal world I'd sit one of the secretaries on top of the fax machine, but, sadly, we are restricted to text here. If you have access to ######### These hashes are supposed a set of female genitals ####### to be pubic hair covering I'd suggest that you ##### the pudendum. compare them with this ### schematic. Single females might like to use a mirror /U\ U is the clitoris (or two) to verify that /' . `\ . is the urethra they're set up like this. /' _ `\ The rest of the characters I should probably say { | / \ | } are supposed to be the outer that this is intended to { ` \ / ' } lips (labia majora), the represent a view of the \ ` ~ ' / inner lips (labia minora), genitals with legs spread, \ ` ' / and the vagina (or is that looking up through the torso ~|~ vulva?) as if the woman were a O O is the anus telescope. For those who never had a close look before and are a bit worried, I ought to say that, except when quite sincerely aroused, female genitals are usually not this clearly set out. The clitoris likes to hide under it's own little hood, the lips stick pretty close to one another, and it is quite likely that if the owner of the genitals is standing up and unaroused you won't really see more than some enticing tufts of hair and maybe the outer lips. Folks whose knowledge of these matters derives mainly from Playboy pictorials may be quite surprised that there's more here than 'just a hole'. Traditionally it was thought that all of the sensation available from the female genitals derived from the lips, entrance to the vagina, and especially the clitoris. In other words, what you see above. It was thought that the interior of the vagina was practically numb to sexual sensation. Now one of those old coots who spent the seventies sticking their noses into other people's intimate businesses was a guy called Grafenberg, if memory serves. Dr G. had this theory that there was an area within the vagina, which was called the Grafenberg spot or G spot, which not only was sexually sensitive but which could trigger bigger and better female orgasms than the clit and the exterior bits could by themselves. Now the trouble with Dr G.'s claim was that not everyone seemed to be able to find this spot, which he reckoned was analogous with the male prostate gland, and those that did find it didn't necessarily like it much, and so there was some controversy, especially in the popular press. A number of folks who did find it and did like it eventually sussed out the mechanics of the spot, and over the last few years there've been a number of quite good books about it. The story is basically this: The G-spot is a flat area about as big as a one or two cent piece, about two inches inside the vagina. It's just behind the pubic bone, on the vaginal wall that is closest to the belly-button. You can reach it with your index finger. If the genitals you're playing with are not very aroused then you might have difficulty finding it, or it might not feel very interesting or nice to the owner. The trick is to make those genitals very aroused, and then have a go at the G-spot. The best way is probably cunnilingus, which is latin for having a lick, but any technique that provides good stimulation of the clitoris will do for starters. Now bear in mind that I'm skipping over a lot here. I strongly recommend a good deal of foreplay before diving into a woman's muff, like at least half an hour, and longer if you like. If you can manage dinner and a good bath beforehand, even better. Actually, I reckon that a bath or a shower before sex is a reasonably good idea anyway, because we're dealing with equipment that can be quite off-putting if it's on the nose when it's on the nose, if you take my meaning. Besides, bathing is fun. So, presuming that your woman is content with the preliminaries and you're going hunting, you're going to have to begin by relaxing. Softly Softly Catchee Monkey. If you're so pent up that slamming your dick in the door has a pleasurable side to it (sorry feminists, I'm not certain what the female equivalent to that state is) then forget all this until you've had a bloody good rogering or two. Once you've achieved a state of patient interest, slowly start to stimulate the clitoris. You've got to be really careful here, because clitori are damned sensitive little beggars, and too much of a good thing is not really a good thing at all. Also, different clitori like different things. Some like quite direct stimulation, some prefer one side or the other, others are so sensitive that they like you to mainly stick to the clitoral hood or the labia. Some like a circular motion, and others like to be lightly flicked back and forth. The best way to find out what your clitoris likes is to ask it's owner, and if she doesn't know then do some experimentation. That's fun too, so don't get pissed off if it takes a little while to figure out what's good for you. As I said, my preferred method is cunnilingus, but if the owner of your clitoris doesn't like that for some reason ("no, my dear, it's not germy and it does taste rather nice") then you'll have to use your fingers. I find that the best thing for clitori is a nice regular stroke, with regular exotic interludes. Basically it's the same thing as for penises - you don't want all sorts of unpredictable jerking around, and you don't want to feel like it's caught in a vise, and you don't want it to feel like it's attached to a reciprocating engine going at 5000 revs. Take it easy. If the owner of your clitoris wants more stimulation you'll notice her writhing around and pushing it at you. If she wants less then she'll draw away. If it's just right then she'll sit where she is and enjoy it. Pay attention to what she does. So, you've got a nice regular stroke going - say, seven strokes and then something exotic, and then another seven strokes and another something exotic. Of course the G spot is in the vagina, and you're going to have to know what's going on in there if you're going to find it and do something with it. Slowly insert a finger or two. Don't grab, because that can be rude and distracting. Now hopefully the vagina that you're dealing with is well lubricated, but that won't necessarily be the case. If you spend a long time at this even the juiciest woman can start to dry out, so it never hurts to have a little lubricant handy, just in case. I'd recommend K-Y jelly, which you should be able to find at any chemist, but there are lots of alternatives. One that I wouldn't recommend is vaseline - too thick. Another is baby oil - too thin, and besides we should conserve the babies :-) You can entertain yourself by running your finger around the inside of the vagina, trying to discern its shape. Unless your female is coming (having an orgasm), you should probably find that the vagina is reasonably form-fitting, although some are tighter than others. If your female is not coming or consciously causing contractions you'll probably find that the vagina isn't doing anything in particular, just sitting there and producing lubricant. If you bring your finger to the front wall of the vagina then you'll find it less yielding than the rest, because there is a bone in front of it called the pubic bone, part of the pelvis. If you feel along this unyielding section or just beyond you may find a slightly raised area. This is the G spot. It might not be raised, but it will engorge once your female starts to come. Don't poke this spot yet. Don't do anything with it, yet. At best you won't have any effect, and at worst you'll be distracting. You've got to wait for your female to start to come. Now this might happen in thirty seconds, or it might take an hour, and you've just got to be patient and keep things regular and smooth. You'll be able to tell your woman is coming when: - she tells you - she moans one hell of a lot and her breathing changes - she flushes, over her face, neck and/or chest - her vagina begins to flutter rhythmically around your finger You may see all of these things, or you may see none of them. If you miss an orgasm, don't stop unless you or she wants to. Women have startling recuperative powers, particularly when they're receiving the right level of attention, and generosity is its own reward. Multiple orgasms are not mythical. Once you believe that your woman is coming you should shift your attention from the clitoris to the G spot. Keep up the same rhythm, but use more pressure. You may want to keep some sort of contact with the clitoris, but just as a penis becomes supersensitive during orgasm, to the point of discomfort, so can a clit. As with the clitoris, you should pay attention to whether the woman pushes towards you, draws away from you or just sits there to gauge the amount of pressure you're giving. You probably won't need to vary your speed much, but pay attention to what she says she wants. Now as you go at the G spot you'll find that your woman keeps coming for longer than you've seen before. You may even experience that most startling of sexual phenomena, a female ejaculation. I've seen three of these (actually I got a mouthful), but I can't say whether the fluid comes from the vagina or the urethra. It's quite nice, sort of like salad dressing. It's definitely not urine, and it is probably polite and hopefully reciprocal to swallow it. Keep going at that G spot. Eventually you will feel the vagina draw away from your finger - it becomes bigger and the walls get taut, and not form-fitting, sort of like a little cave. When it does this it's time to switch back to the clitoris. Keep up the same rhythm. When the vagina begins to contract on your finger again, go back to the G spot. If you keep this up for a while (and if the owner of your female genitals wants to stop, then stop - this isn't a competition), you'll find that the nature of the vaginal contractions changes. The cave effect becomes less and less frequent and you can spend more and more time with the G spot. Also, the contractions in the vagina become less simple squeezing and fluttering, and more a sort of reverse swallowing - a contraction that starts deep within the vagina and travels to its entrance. It feels a bit like the vagina is trying to push your finger out. Eventually (may take hours and patience and many tries) you've got nothing but these push-out contractions, and you can go on as long as the owner of the genitals wants to, and your tongue and fingers don't wear out. If you go on this long you're almost certainly going to need some extra lubricant, so be prepared. There you have it. At least in my experience, women can have orgasms that last orders of magnitude longer and seem to be much better than those that men can have. I guess I better add a disclaimer that all of this is only one man's experience, and I could be completely wrong about the female genitals that you have. I'm not certain there is such a thing as device independence where sexual equipment is concerned. I don't think that any of the things I've advocated can do you any harm, but see your doctor if you've doubts. The main thing is to have fun. Happy fucking. THIRD ARTICLE (for those who prefer a more scientific approach) From: N51LS801@ncsuvm.cc.ncsu.edu Message-ID: <167B7BB6F.N51LS801@ncsuvm.cc.ncsu.edu> Date: 27 Mar 92 18:19:42 GMT The following information about female ejaculation and the Grafenberg spot is quoted from a widely used, frequently revised college text on human sexuality: Robert Crooks and Karla Baur, OUR SEXUALITY, 4th ed. (Redwood City, CA: Benjamin/Cummings Pub. Co., 1990), 117, 206-208. [HQ21.C698 1990] Cited references are given at the end of the selection. The Grafenberg spot is an area located within the anterior (or front) wall of the vagina, about one centimetre from the surface and one-third to one-half way in from the vaginal opening. It is reported to consist of a system of glands (Skene's glands) and ducts that surround the urethra (Heath, 1984). This area is believed to be the female counterpart of the male prostate gland and to develop from the same embryonic tissue (Belzer, 1981; Heath, 1984). The Grafenberg spot has generated considerable interest because of reports that some women experience sexual arousal, orgasm, or perhaps an ejaculation of fluid when stimulated there. There is wide variation in response from person to person (Zaviacic et al., 1988). (117) In the last few years, a number of studies have reported that some women are capable of experiencing orgasm, and perhaps ejaculation, when an area along the anterior wall of the vagina is vigorously stimulated (Addiego et al., 1981; Alzate & Hoch, 1986; Belzer, 1981; Perry & Whipple, 1981; Sevely & Bennet, 1978; Whipple & Komisaruk, 1988; Zaviacic et al., 1988). This area of erotic sensitivity... has been named the Grafenberg spot (or G spot) in honour of Ernest Grafenberg (1950), a gynecologist who first noted the erotic significance of this location within the vagina 40 years ago. However, the presence of glandular structures in this area was noted in the medical literature over 100 years ago (Skene, 1880). Recently, it has been suggested that the Grafenberg spot is not a point that can be touched by the tip of one finger but, rather, fairly large area composed of the lower anterior wall of the vagina and the underlying urethra and surrounding glands. Adequate stimulation of this much vaginal tissue may require use of "the full breadth of the middle two fingers and at least two thirds of their lengths" (Heath, 1984, p. 205) Robert Mallon (1984), a pathologist and medical researcher, recently presented evidence of glandular material similar to prostate tissue in the Grafenberg area of 42 females examined by postmortem autopsies. Corroboration of this research was provided by another study in which complete urethras and surrounding tissue from 17 autopsied females and a portion of a urethra from one surgical specimen were examined. Over 80% of the specimens had prostatelike glandular tissue, the majority of which contained substances known to be produced by the male prostate (Heath, 1984). The Grafenberg spot, or area, may be located by "systematic palpation of the entire anterior wall of the vagina between the posterior side of the pubic bone and the cervix. Two fingers are usually employed, and it is often necessary to press deeply into the tissue to reach the spot" (Perry & Whipple, 1981, p. 29). This exploration may conducted by a woman's partner, as shown in Figure 6.9 [Diagram omitted] Some women are able to locate their Grafenberg spot through self-exploration. (206) During initial searching for the sometimes elusive Grafenberg spot, a woman or her partner must rely on the sensations produced by manual stimulation. When the area is located, women report a variety of initial sensations, including a slight feeling of discomfort, a brief sensation of needing to urinate, or a pleasurable feeling. After a minute or more of stroking the sensations usually become more pleasurable, and the area may begin to swell to a discernible size. Continued stimulation of the area may result in an orgasm that is often quite intense. Perhaps the most amazing thing about Grafenberg spot orgasms is that they are sometimes accompanied by the ejaculation of fluid from the urethral opening. Four researchers describe their observation of this event: [Begin quote] With the aid of the subject's husband, four of us (Addiego, Belzer, Perry, and Whipple) were able to observe her response to digital massage of her Grafenberg spot, which led to expulsion of liquid, and reportedly and apparently to orgasm, on several occasions. On none of these occasions did stimulation of the clitoris, direct or otherwise, appear to occur. Orgasmic expulsions occurred after less than a minute of stimulation; they were separated in a multi- orgasmic series by similarly brief periods of time. The urethral area was clearly exposed in bright light, and there was absolutely no doubt that the liquid was expelled from the urethral meatus. Sometimes it exuded from the meatus. At other times it was expelled from one to a few centimetres. On one observed occasion, expulsion was of sufficient force to create a series of wet spots covering a distance of more than a meter. (Addiego et al., 1981, p. 17) [End quote] (207) Research indicates that the source of this fluid is the "female prostate"... The ducts from this system empty directly into the urethra. In some women Grafenberg orgasms result in fluid being forced through these ducts and out the urethra. In view of the homologous nature of the Grafenberg spot tissue and the male prostate, we might speculate that the female ejaculate is similar to the prostatic component of male seminal fluid. This notion has been supported by one study in which specimens of female ejaculate were chemically analyzed and found to contain high levels of an enzyme, prostatic acid phosphatase (PAP), characteristic of the prostatic component of semen (Addiego et al., 1981). Many women report that the fluid has a mild semenlike scent. A later study of six female ejaculators failed to differentiate samples of their urine and the fluid they ejaculated during sexual response (Goldberg et al., 1983). However, a still more recent study of seven women who ejaculate reported that the collected urine and ejaculate samples differed substantially in the amount of PAP present (Belzer et al., 1984). The inconsistency in these findings may be due, at least in part, to a methodological problem arising from the fact that both ejaculate and urine are delivered through the urethra. A very recent study reported finding concentrations of fructose in the female ejaculate (Zaviacic et al., 1988b). (... fructose is a major component of male ejaculate.) The fructose level in the orgasmic expulsions of women is considerably higher than that found in their urine, a finding that "suggests that the female ejaculate cannot be simply regarded as urine..." (Zaviacic et al., 1988b, p. 323). We can expect that the controversy over the biochemistry of the female ejaculate will continue until, hopefully, further research clarifies the precise nature of this fluid. (208) References cited: Addiego, F. Belzer, E., Comolli, J., Moger, W., Perry, J. and Whipple, B. (1981) Female ejaculation: A case study. JOURNAL OF SEX RESEARCH, 17, 13-21. Alzate, H. and Hoch, Z. (1986) The "G spot" and "female ejaculation": A current appraisal. JOURNAL OF SEX AND MARITAL THERAPY, 12, 211-220. Belzer, E. Orgasmic expulsions of women: A review and heuristic inquiry. JOURNAL OF SEX RESEARCH, 17, 1-12. Goldberg, D., Whipple, B., Fishkin, R., Waxman, H., Fink, P. and Weisberg, M. (1983) The Grafenberg spot and female ejaculation: A review of initial hypotheses. JOURNAL OF SEX AND MARITAL THERAPY, 9, 27-37. Heath, D. An investigation into the origins of a copious vaginal discharge during intercourse -"enough to wet the bed"-that "is not urine." JOURNAL OF SEX RESEARCH, 20, 194-215. Mallon, R. (Oct. 1984) Demonstration of vestigial prostatic tissue in the human female. Paper presented at the Annual Regional Conference of American Association of Sex Educators, Counsellors, and Therapists, Las Vegas. Perry, J. and Whipple, B. (1981) Pelvic muscle strength of female ejaculators: Evidence in support of a new theory of orgasm. JOURNAL OF SEX RESEARCH, 17, 22-39. Sevely, J. and Bennett, J. (1979) Concerning female ejaculation and the female prostate. JOURNAL OF SEX RESEARCH, 14, 1-20. Skene, A. (1880) Two important glands of the urethra. AMERICAN JOURNAL OF OBSTETRICS, 265, 265-270. Whipple, B. and Komisaruk, B. (1988) Analgesia produced in women by genital self-stimulation. JOURNAL OF SEX RESEARCH, 24, 130- 140. Zaviacic, M., Zaviacicova, A., Holoman, I., and Molcan, J. (1988a) Female urethral expulsions evoked by local digital stimulation of the G-spot: Differences in the response patterns. JOURNAL OF SEX RESEARCH, 24, 311-318. Zaviacic, M., Dolezalova, S., Holoman, K., Zaviacicova, A., Mikulecky, M., and Bradil, V. (1988b) Concentrations of fructose in female ejaculate and urine: A comparative biochemical study. JOURNAL OF SEX RESEARCH, 24, 319-325. ------------------------------------------


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