Well, if you liked that, here's a couple more that are fun to do and that virtually GUARAN
From: Scott Kephart
Well, if you liked that, here's a couple more that are fun to do and that
virtually GUARANTEE that they WON'T bother you again:
1> Answer the door completely naked and invite them in to the orgy. Extra
points for fondling yourself absent-mindedly while talking to them.
2> Wear camoflage pants, a shirt saying "Kill 'em ALL, let GOD sort 'em
out," and answer the door carrying a rifle. (An axe works pretty well
here too.) Be paranoid and talk psycho survivalist talk until they get
scared and leave.
3> Convert 'em to YOUR religion. Believe it or not, psychologically
speaking, people who are out witnessing are the second easiest people to
convert. (The easiest people are alcoholics or drug addicts who are
desperate.) It's kind of like selling something to a salesman. Salesmen
tend to be able to believe ANYTHING, hence they can sell things more
easily because they actually believe in what they are selling. This is
a two edged sword, though. Because of this, salesmen are often the
EASIEST people to sell to. Same is true with religion.
4> If they happen to leave you any of those "Postage guaranteed" business
reply cards that you can send in for "free information." Glue 'em to
bricks and send 'em in! The post office HAS to deliver them, and it'll
cost whatever organization sent the offensive fool about 10 bucks a brick.
5> Take ALL literature they offer. In fact, take as many copies as they'll
give you. It cost 'em something to print it and most of it is just
jim-dandy for starting a barbeque grill.
Basically, I place door-to-door preachers in the same class as as door-to-
door salesmen. I think what they do is pretty aggressive, and I feel I have
every right to strike back in every non-violent, legal way that I possibly can.
I don't like people who come to my home to sell me ANYTHING, be it religion or
vacuum cleaners. Besides, it's fun to watch 'em go away mad.
E-Mail Fredric L. Rice / The Skeptic Tank