From: Mark Schnitzius
To: All Msg #14, Mar-28-93 02:03PM
Subject: Don't spank me, Lord
Organization: University of Central Florida
From: email@example.com (Mark Schnitzius)
I was handed this flyer in the parking lot of the local Wal-Mart.
I guess it's geared towards children, but it struck me as funny.
Here are some excerpts:
"THE REASON _WHY_ WE NEED TO COME TO JESUS, is that we have all done
wrong & been naughty, so we deserve a _spanking_, a punishment, which
makes our Heavenly Father, God, very sad. But God's Son, _Jesus_, our
_Big Brother_, _loved_ us & the Father so much, that He knew that the
spanking would _hurt_ us both, so _He_ offered to take it _for_ us!
...YOU CAN RECEIVE JESUS' LOVE & FORGIVENESS RIGHT _NOW_ BY PRAYING
THIS LITTLE PRAYER: 'Dear Jesus, please forgive me for being bad &
deserving a big spanking! Thank You so much for taking my punishment
Hmmm... What new revision of the Bible was it where Pilate only gave
Jesus a bad spanking?
University of Central Florida