+-----------------------+----I think that when the aliens come,----+ | Ben Liddicott

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+-----------------------+----I think that when the aliens come,----+ | Ben Liddicott | they will look like us, talk like us and | | b.liddicott@ic.ac.uk | think like us. We'd better have some | +-----------------------+----bloody big guns waiting for them.-----+ Ps, find contradictions in *this*, if you can: The Parable of the Null Question from The Book of the Oracle. It came to pass that a supplicant did come unto the land of Yhusnet, yea and did question most mightily, saying: 2 Whence came the four winds, and why art there four thereof? 3 Yea and if God didst create all the heavens, and all that in them is, then who created God? 4 And even, how much wood could a woodchuck chuck, if a woodchuck could chuck wood, and can it? 5 And thus he did question mightily, and none could answer him. 6 And by the mightiness of his questions, he did confound all who heard him, and they were sorely troubled. 7 And they did conspire against him, saying, let us hang him in a high tree, and, let us drown him in a deep ocean. 8 One said: No, let us press him with stones, and another said: let us throw him from a high place. 9 Yet another said: Let us make him sore afraid, and he shall trouble us no more. 10 And they agreed to do this thing. 11 Lo and they did descend on his house that day and they said unto him. 12 Yea, and they did enquire of him, in low voices, and he was confused 13 They did even ask him oft. 14 And it came to pass that he was bewildered. 15 When they asked him more he did fall to the ground, crying: Woe woe woe is me, woe unto them that ask but have not a question, yea, woe to him that cannot answer them. 16 And he did wail mightily to the very skies. 17 And they that were with him did go their way satisfied. 18 Yea and he did cry mightily for two days and three nights. 19 And on the third day he did rise again, and said: Yea, I shall travel to the Oracle which is in the subdomain of Indianah, in the domain of Ehdoo, and though the journey may be hard, and the way perilous and fraught with Rooters, I shall ask of the Oracle. 20 For I cannot rest until I know the answer. 21 And it came to pass, after the space of a year, that he came to Indianah, in the domain of Ehdoo, and the journey was perilous. 22 And he did come unto the place of the Oracle, and did queue most diligently for the space of half a year. 23 And after half a year had passed away, it was time to ask the Oracle his question. 24 Yea he did grovel most humbly before the Oracle, and all were amazed at his obesience. 25 And the Oracle spake saying: Ask what it is you have come here to know. 26 And he did ask saying:. 27 The Oracle did consider this. 28 And lo, the Oracle did answer saying:. 29 And all were amazed at the Oracle's wisdom. 30 Yea and when the man arrived in his own land, he did question more mightily than before, but this time none could silence him.


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