Top Ten uses for a bible:
10. Paper weight
9. Kindling for the fireplace.
8. Book end.
7. Centerpiece of your pagan ritual pentagram (covered with goat skin
and virgin blood)
6. Recycle!! (there a lot of waste paper in there)
5. Hold a bible throwing contest!
4. Amaze your friends!! Throw your voice!!! Using the holy spirit.
3. See how good of a paper airplane you can make out of that ultra-thin
bible page paper.
2. Stand on a corner handing out bibles until someone spits in your face,
beats you up, and calls you a fundie.
And the number one use for a bible:
1. Use it to trick yourself into believing that you actually have a life,
that there is a god, and that when you die you are going to heaven to
spend the rest of eternity in bliss, singing the praises of God.