Baldilocks and the Two Bears .....
Once upon a time, there lived an old man called Baldilocks, well
known for his shining bonce, which had once been covered with a thick
mat of hair. That was many years ago, and Baldilocks resemblance to
an egg was now known far and wide.
One day Baldilocks went for a walk to a distant city, where he
would be busy with work as a seer. As he was travelling on the road
between a town one one side, and a forest on the other, a crowd of
joyful, laughing, innocent little boys came out of the town gates.
"Hello, mister man, what do you do ?" they asked him.
"Why, little boys, I'm a seer. I prophesy for the Christian God,
and bless those who do good and curse those who do evil."
"Oh, and who taught you to be a seer ?", they asked again.
"My teacher was Elijah, who went up to heaven in the fiery
chariot of the Lord !" he replied.
"Aha ! Can you go up to heaven, too ?" they said, and danced
around him in a ring, singing "Go on up, you Baldy head, go on up,
you Baldy head !".
Baldilocks became most indignant at this ! He was a serious
prophet of a serious God ! "A curse on your heads, in the Lord's name !"
he declared. He pushed his way through the now silent children, the
youngest of whom were beginning to cry at such harsh treatment.
Two bears came out of the woods, chasing the poor little fellows
and ripping forty-two of them to shreds ! So end those who mock and
jest against the Christian God and his serious prophets !
"That'll tell 'em," said Baldilocks. "I'm not REALLY bald," he
added, brushing a few remaining strands of hair from over his left
ear, dragging them across his scalp in an attempt to salve his hurt
ego. Even this would not work, as a strong wind was soon to blow,
causing the remaining strands of his mop to stream out like the tail
of a comet .....