In September 1988, The Honorable Judge Sysop the Batman convened the Court of Last Resort.

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In September 1988, The Honorable Judge Sysop the Batman convened the Court of Last Resort. The following transcript needs no further introduction. Compliments- Captain Zinger - the Z-Base. FROM the Original Batboard... The System has Msg's 2 to 863 Starting number, =First? Msg#: 3 *ARENA* 09/23/88 23:21:41 (Read 21 Times) From: THE GREEN FLY To: ALL Subj: IN SESSION Hear ye! Hear Ye! The Court of Last Resort is now in session. The Honorable Judge THE Batman presiding. Next Case: Members of The BatBoard vs. Lord Byron. Lord Byron, you have been charged with crimes against intelligence and good taste. The trial will be held here in the Arena - Jury selection has begun and the court shall appoint your counsel and a prosecuting attorney. How do you plead? Rusty the Baliff Msg#: 340 *ARENA* 09/29/88 18:36:16 (Read 17 Times) From: SYSOP To: CAPTAIN ZINGER (Rcvd) Subj: REPLY TO MSG# 3 (IN SESSION) (oh, by the way, this is the first time a true trial has ever been conducted on a bulletin board, so sorry about the lack of a schedule. I'll be announcing things in the order necessary from now on.) Sir, I did not catch on what grounds you're pleading 'Not Guilty' - what are they again? ***** Sysop Msg#: 344 *ARENA* 09/29/88 19:55:10 (Read 13 Times) From: CAPTAIN ZINGER To: SYSOP (Rcvd) Subj: REPLY TO MSG# 340 (IN SESSION) Your honor, the defendant enters the plea of Not Guilty. The case for the defense will be made after the prosecution concludes its "case" As a matter of procedure, Before I offer opening arguments, I must most strenuosly object to the jury selection process. The nature of the charges make it imperative that the jury not be biased, and all jurors have been seated without the affording of proper challenge by the defense. Secondly, I object to the lack of proper "discovery" wherein the Defense is allowed to see (nay, PRESENTED) with all material evidense of the prosecution's case, or the Nature and Scope of same. Thirdly, I find it completely unacceptable that a juror serve as assistant prosecution counsel unless of course that a juror may assist me in my agreeably difficult task. ******C 'I know you'll make it fair, your honor!' Z****** I will offer opening arguments once these matters are cleared. Msg#: 350 *ARENA* 09/29/88 20:53:07 (Read 15 Times) From: SYSOP To: CAPTAIN ZINGER (Rcvd) Subj: REPLY TO MSG# 344 (IN SESSION) Very good points, counsel - your client is indeed fortunate to have such representation... Once again, I must point out that our jury base was not a big one (at 300 baud - later, when more users can access us, it'll be different!)... and therefore I was forced to take whatever measures I could to acquire them. However, I will certainly listen to your objections to particular jurors. As to your point concerning the Batwoman acting as both juror and assistant to the Prosecutor, I can only claim lack of jurors - but, since both you and the Prosecutor seem so inclined, I will grant your motion to separate her from jury duties for the course of the trial. Let the record so show that The BatWoman is now assistant to Prosecutor Reebok (since she seems to favor that role instead of juror). With these in mind, I await either your further requests or an official opening argument on the trial string. Prosecutor Reebok has no written documentation to show you, having little or no time to prepare his case... and, as an amateur expert in trial law, I can assure you that the Prosecutor is NOT liable to provide you with his strategy. Now, if Mr. Reebok has actual textfiles, that is another matter... but I feel that if he relies on eyewitness testimony, he is not required to share information. Oh, I must remind you that The BatWoman is now available as a witness in the trial. Perhaps you should have left her a juror! ***** Sysop The Judge Do you wish to delete this msg(y/n)? N Msg#: 364 *ARENA* 09/30/88 03:48:34 (Read 14 Times) From: PROMETHEUS REEBOK To: SYSOP (Rcvd) Subj: REPLY TO MSG# 350 (IN SESSION) My evidence is available to all users - I will rely on the public message bases and "eye"witness testimony. Msg#: 392 *ARENA* 09/30/88 17:45:32 (Read 14 Times) From: THE BATWOMAN To: SYSOP (Rcvd) Subj: REPLY TO MSG# 350 (IN SESSION) I betcha Kitty Katt would be a juror. Have you asked her yet? Msg#: 394 *ARENA* 09/30/88 18:10:37 (Read 15 Times) From: KITTY KATT To: THE BATWOMAN (Rcvd) Subj: REPLY TO MSG# 392 (IN SESSION) I'm here! but.....I finally crept in..... Msg#: 400 *ARENA* 09/30/88 19:01:56 (Read 12 Times) From: CAPTAIN ZINGER To: SYSOP (Rcvd) Subj: REPLY TO MSG# 350 (IN SESSION) Thank you, your honor. I take this opportunity to remind the court that I did NOT request disclosure of the strategy of the honorobal Mr. Reebok, (one of the most distinguished Prometheosecutors practicing at the bar known to any of us). Only the disclosure of the evidence. Also, your honor, I am sure you were only being humble in your description of yourself as an "amateur expert in trial law" How can he who IS the law be anything less? I will make ready, then my opening statement of position, and post it at my next opportunity. Do you wish to delete this msg(y/n)? N Msg#: 413 *ARENA* 09/30/88 19:54:28 (Read 13 Times) From: SYSOP To: PROMETHEUS REEBOK (Rcvd) Subj: REPLY TO MSG# 364 (IN SESSION) As I had thought. Thanks for verifying the fact. The claim by Counselor Zinger to view your records remains dismissed, then, since you have no such records to see. ***** Sysop The Judge Msg#: 420 *ARENA* 09/30/88 20:11:46 (Read 15 Times) From: SYSOP To: THE BATWOMAN (Rcvd) Subj: REPLY TO MSG# 392 (IN SESSION) Kitty's already agreed to lend a paw in the jury! ***** Sysop Msg#: 536 *ARENA* 10/02/88 17:13:57 (Read 12 Times) From: THE BATWOMAN To: KITTY KATT Subj: REPLY TO MSG# 394 (IN SESSION) Good! Now, we can go at 1200 baud again. We need you here. They want you to be a witness or a juror or something--we gotta get ol' Lord Boring, (ain't it the truth?)! Glad you made it here . . . tbw Msg#: 538 *ARENA* 10/02/88 17:18:28 (Read 12 Times) From: THE BATWOMAN To: SYSOP (Rcvd) Subj: REPLY TO MSG# 420 (IN SESSION) Great! But am I the only witness? Can the court jester be a witness, others? Msg#: 556 *ARENA* 10/02/88 18:46:20 (Read 13 Times) From: LORD BYRON To: THE BATWOMAN (Rcvd) Subj: REPLY TO MSG# 538 (IN SESSION) Looky here, Bratwoman needs everybody. Hag, you gonna need everybody to run me out. Yep, can't take the heat. You don't want to get humiliated anymore. If I am guilty for the maximum sentence, it will for only a week. You better those moments of peace and serenity because they won't last long. Lord'Chaos and mayhem'Byron. Msg#: 564 *ARENA* 10/02/88 19:10:57 (Read 13 Times) From: SYSOP To: THE BATWOMAN (Rcvd) Subj: REPLY TO MSG# 538 (IN SESSION) The Jester, Reporter and Heckler may all be witnesses... ***** Sysop The Judge Msg#: 586 *ARENA* 10/03/88 08:24:48 (Read 12 Times) From: THE BATWOMAN To: SYSOP (Rcvd) Subj: REPLY TO MSG# 564 (IN SESSION) Good. Thanks for the information. Msg#: 614 *ARENA* 10/03/88 13:01:48 (Read 13 Times) From: LORD BYRON To: THE BATWOMAN (Rcvd) Subj: REPLY TO MSG# 586 (IN SESSION) Have fun in YOUR Kangaroo Court, tramp. Lord'This trial is DEFINITELY rigged!'Byron. Msg#: 28 *ARENA* 09/24/88 11:27:34 (Read 21 Times) From: CAPTAIN ZINGER To: PROMETHEUS REEBOK (Rcvd) Subj: ORDER IN DE COURT In response to yours and His Honor's request that I serve as prosecuting attorney, I must decline. As I have been attempting to offe r counsel to the accused privately, I would accept an appointment as defense counsel. You know as well as I, Promey, that you would make a much better prosecuting attorney in this case. As a traveling justice from the TRUE Court of Last Resort, the door must be kept open for the accused to have his appeal rights protected. So best I serve in his defense. I noticed that Cheap Shot noticed that no Court Jester has been named. I think that THIS important appointment should be made before ANY further actions are taken. I recommend Nerp for the job. Do you wish to delete this msg(y/n)? N Msg#: 34 *ARENA* 09/24/88 13:21:38 (Read 20 Times) From: FLASH FIRE To: CAPTAIN ZINGER (Rcvd) Subj: ORDER IN DE COURT Do I detect a note of sexual stereotyping there Capt. Zinger. Why should our Batwoman be relegated as court reporter. Seargent at Arms sounds better to me. Do you wish to delete this msg(y/n)? N Msg#: 43 *ARENA* 09/24/88 14:53:34 (Read 20 Times) From: CAPTAIN ZINGER To: FLASH FIRE (Rcvd) Subj: REPLY TO MSG# 34 (ORDER IN DE COURT) Absolutely no sekshool stereotyping, Flash. Batwo man did some reporting in another life and was purty good at it as I hear. I think she would be interested in accuracy! But then we probably don't need a reporter as much as we need a jester as Everything is recorded anyway. Do you wish to delete this msg(y/n)? N Msg#: 76 *ARENA* 09/25/88 13:52:57 (Read 16 Times) From: FLASH FIRE To: CAPTAIN ZINGER (Rcvd) Subj: REPLY TO MSG# 43 (ORDER IN DE COURT) Okay by me but maybe BATWOMAN would like a choice??? Do you wish to delete this msg(y/n)? N Msg#: 95 *ARENA* 09/26/88 08:40:36 (Read 15 Times) From: THE BATWOMAN To: FLASH FIRE (Rcvd) Subj: REPLY TO MSG# 76 (ORDER IN DE COURT) Most definitely! Thanks for being so perceptive. I'd like to be, if given a choice, the assistant to the prosecuting attourney. If not that, then a member of the jury. I promise not to lie (heh heh) when asked if I can be objective (snicker). t 'casting a vote for Nerp as court jester' bw Msg#: 104 *ARENA* 09/26/88 12:05:57 (Read 14 Times) From: SYSOP To: THE BATWOMAN (Rcvd) Subj: REPLY TO MSG# 95 (ORDER IN DE COURT) BW, I'd rather have you as a juror, since our membership is limited at the moment... but I'll bet you'll come in handy as an OBJECTIVE witness too! ***** 'may I step down into the box again?' Sysop Msg#: 123 *ARENA* 09/26/88 16:41:56 (Read 15 Times) From: FLASH FIRE To: THE BATWOMAN (Rcvd) Subj: REPLY TO MSG# 95 (ORDER IN DE COURT) Perception is everything my Dear.. Msg#: 133 *ARENA* 09/26/88 17:56:02 (Read 17 Times) From: CAPTAIN ZINGER To: FLASH FIRE (Rcvd) Subj: REPLY TO MSG# 76 (ORDER IN DE COURT) She has always had the choice and needs none of us to provide it. Do you wish to delete this msg(y/n)? N Msg#: 143 *ARENA* 09/26/88 19:44:26 (Read 17 Times) From: LORD BYRON To: THE BATWOMAN (Rcvd) Subj: REPLY TO MSG# 95 (ORDER IN DE COURT) Yeah, you would like to be assistant prosecuting attorney, fool. You're gonna get the same results as the other Batboard, a big zero, zero. Lord'The bad one is here'Byron. Msg#: 144 *ARENA* 09/26/88 19:46:54 (Read 16 Times) From: LORD BYRON To: SYSOP (Rcvd) Subj: REPLY TO MSG# 104 (ORDER IN DE COURT) Yeah two idiots are prosecuting attorneys would make me laugh too hard. Good choice Batman. Lord'Who's next'Byron. Msg#: 149 *ARENA* 09/26/88 23:10:07 (Read 15 Times) From: FLASH FIRE To: CAPTAIN ZINGER (Rcvd) Subj: REPLY TO MSG# 133 (ORDER IN DE COURT) Based on what I've been reading, your soooooo right. Do you wish to delete this msg(y/n)? N Msg#: 196 *ARENA* 09/27/88 10:12:21 (Read 12 Times) From: THE BATWOMAN To: SYSOP (Rcvd) Subj: REPLY TO MSG# 104 (ORDER IN DE COURT) "Oh, I will! I will!" she said with a small but wicked smile. Msg#: 199 *ARENA* 09/27/88 10:23:44 (Read 13 Times) From: THE BATWOMAN To: FLASH FIRE (Rcvd) Subj: REPLY TO MSG# 149 (ORDER IN DE COURT) I'm soooooo pushy. Just ask Cheap Shot. (hee hee) Msg#: 200 *ARENA* 09/27/88 10:25:27 (Read 13 Times) From: THE BATWOMAN To: LORD BYRON (Rcvd) Subj: REPLY TO MSG# 143 (ORDER IN DE COURT) Lordy, Byron. You neglected to see the number 1 in front of those two zeroes, as in 100. You should read things more carefully, hungh? Msg#: 212 *ARENA* 09/27/88 16:45:01 (Read 14 Times) From: LORD BYRON To: THE BATWOMAN (Rcvd) Subj: REPLY TO MSG# 199 (ORDER IN DE COURT) You're soooooo idiotic. Just ask anyone. Lord'The barrage continues'Byron. Msg#: 215 *ARENA* 09/27/88 16:52:47 (Read 14 Times) From: LORD BYRON To: THE BATWOMAN (Rcvd) Subj: REPLY TO MSG# 200 (ORDER IN DE COURT) That must the number of how bad your replies suck. On 1 to 10 a BIG 100 for that. So shut up, before I have to hurt you some more. Lord'Where's the competition'Byron. Msg#: 254 *ARENA* 09/27/88 22:20:27 (Read 14 Times) From: FLASH FIRE To: THE BATWOMAN (Rcvd) Subj: REPLY TO MSG# 199 (ORDER IN DE COURT) I'll ask but I dont expect the Court Jester to make much sense. Wonder where the Cheap shots been hiding latley. Here cheapie, cheapie. Msg#: 255 *ARENA* 09/27/88 22:23:28 (Read 14 Times) From: FLASH FIRE To: LORD BYRON (Rcvd) Subj: REPLY TO MSG# 215 (ORDER IN DE COURT) I believe you will meet your competion in court. Then you will learn the real meaning of competition. Go ahead and keep pulling out enough rope to hang yourself. . . Flash ''hope we have a hangin judge'' Fire Msg#: 279 *ARENA* 09/28/88 16:45:01 (Read 14 Times) From: THE BATWOMAN To: LORD BYRON (Rcvd) Subj: REPLY TO MSG# 212 (ORDER IN DE COURT) Oh, dear. If I said anything to offend you, please let me know. t 'I might want to do it again' bw Msg#: 280 *ARENA* 09/28/88 16:47:17 (Read 14 Times) From: THE BATWOMAN To: LORD BYRON (Rcvd) Subj: REPLY TO MSG# 215 (ORDER IN DE COURT) Don't give me a piece of your mind! t 'you can't spare it' bw Msg#: 302 *ARENA* 09/28/88 19:42:33 (Read 16 Times) From: LORD BYRON To: THE BATWOMAN (Rcvd) Subj: REPLY TO MSG# 279 (ORDER IN DE COURT) Woman in your wildest DREAMS, you couldn't say anything to offend me. Not in your case, though. That's why you like kissing Prometheus's butt. Lord'Like a lot of people around here'Byron. Msg#: 304 *ARENA* 09/28/88 19:49:18 (Read 18 Times) From: LORD BYRON To: FLASH FIRE (Rcvd) Subj: REPLY TO MSG# 255 (ORDER IN DE COURT) What's the matter, Batwoman needs a sucker like you to reply to her messages for her. You don't sound MAN enough to hang me, boy. I don't see any competition in court either. It's just a bunch of suckers who got their feelings hurt. Lord'I show no remorse'Byron. Msg#: 305 *ARENA* 09/28/88 19:51:46 (Read 17 Times) From: LORD BYRON To: THE BATWOMAN (Rcvd) Subj: REPLY TO MSG# 280 (ORDER IN DE COURT) Woman, you shouldn't be talking about minds. You don't have much to talk for in your case. That's why you need Flash to 'assit' you against me. Lord'A Confederacy of Dunces'Byron. Msg#: 388 *ARENA* 09/30/88 17:27:15 (Read 14 Times) From: THE BATWOMAN To: LORD BYRON (Rcvd) Subj: REPLY TO MSG# 302 (ORDER IN DE COURT) The only thing you should fear more than losing your mind is finding it. t 'have to go now, I'm falling asleep' bw Msg#: 389 *ARENA* 09/30/88 17:30:56 (Read 14 Times) From: THE BATWOMAN To: LORD BYRON (Rcvd) Subj: REPLY TO MSG# 305 (ORDER IN DE COURT) Just because you have a pointed head doesn't make you sharp, you know. (yawn) tbw Msg#: 498 *ARENA* 10/02/88 01:59:41 (Read 14 Times) From: LORD BYRON To: THE BATWOMAN (Rcvd) Subj: REPLY TO MSG# 388 (ORDER IN DE COURT) More like your hand is falling asleep. Now now, things like that turn you blind. Those parts still working in your senile age. Lord'Nothing like humiliating a hag at 2 in the morning'Byron. Msg#: 499 *ARENA* 10/02/88 02:01:59 (Read 13 Times) From: LORD BYRON To: THE BATWOMAN (Rcvd) Subj: REPLY TO MSG# 389 (ORDER IN DE COURT) I got your pointed head for you. Lord'I can get down and dirty, tramp'Byron. Msg#: 55 *ARENA* 09/24/88 16:23:30 (Read 19 Times) From: SYSOP To: ALL Subj: APPOINTMENTS SO FAR As of this moment, the Court's appointments are: >Jury - Nerp, Kitty Kat, Johann Schmat, Flash Fire and Batwoman . (so far Nerp, Kitty and Flash have accepted) >Prosecuting attorney - Prometheus >Defense counsel - Captain Zinger . (he's accepted) >Court Jester (combination play-by-play commentary and reporter) - Cheap Shot . (he volunteered) >Bailiff - Green Fly . (he's accepted) AND, of course, yours truly, circuit court Judge The Batman... as soon as the appointments are filled, the trial will proceed. ***** Sysop Msg#: 59 *ARENA* 09/25/88 04:00:35 (Read 16 Times) From: PROMETHEUS REEBOK To: SYSOP (Rcvd) Subj: REPLY TO MSG# 55 (APPOINTMENTS SO FAR) I'll accept my appointment to the Prosecutor's desk. Msg#: 66 *ARENA* 09/25/88 11:58:31 (Read 16 Times) From: SYSOP To: PROMETHEUS REEBOK (Rcvd) Subj: REPLY TO MSG# 59 (APPOINTMENTS SO FAR) Thank you Prometheus, the Court is indeed fortunate to have someone of your caliber to try the Board's case... ***** Judge Sysop Msg#: 82 *ARENA* 09/25/88 14:25:41 (Read 15 Times) From: LE BARONESS To: SYSOP (Rcvd) Subj: REPLY TO MSG# 55 (APPOINTMENTS SO FAR) I volunteer for spectator as long as we can hoot,holler and yell. . not taking sides Le Baroness Msg#: 84 *ARENA* 09/25/88 21:03:55 (Read 14 Times) From: PROMETHEUS REEBOK To: SYSOP (Rcvd) Subj: REPLY TO MSG# 66 (APPOINTMENTS SO FAR) The pleasure is mine, your honor. Msg#: 96 *ARENA* 09/26/88 08:44:47 (Read 14 Times) From: THE BATWOMAN To: SYSOP (Rcvd) Subj: REPLY TO MSG# 66 (APPOINTMENTS SO FAR) I'd like to assist Mr. Reebok, if that's possible. If not, then I will accept the position on the jury. I (ahem) do promise (giggle) to be objective. tbw Msg#: 97 *ARENA* 09/26/88 08:47:06 (Read 14 Times) From: THE BATWOMAN To: PROMETHEUS REEBOK (Rcvd) Subj: REPLY TO MSG# 84 (APPOINTMENTS SO FAR) If His Honor permits, may I assit you with your case against the defendant? tbw Msg#: 109 *ARENA* 09/26/88 12:17:02 (Read 12 Times) From: SYSOP To: LE BARONESS (Rcvd) Subj: REPLY TO MSG# 82 (APPOINTMENTS SO FAR) I hereby appoint you as Court Heckler, to work in unison with Court Jester Cheap Shot... or as an alternate for the jury, if necessary... thanks from the Court! ***** 'gearing up now' Sysop Msg#: 111 *ARENA* 09/26/88 12:19:58 (Read 13 Times) From: SYSOP To: THE BATWOMAN (Rcvd) Subj: REPLY TO MSG# 97 (APPOINTMENTS SO FAR) As mentioned before, you'd best serve the Court as a juror, but since our first case is informal, you may freely discuss the events in question in Email. ***** Sysop The Judge Msg#: 119 *ARENA* 09/26/88 15:42:29 (Read 14 Times) From: LE BARONESS To: SYSOP (Rcvd) Subj: REPLY TO MSG# 109 (APPOINTMENTS SO FAR) Thank you kind sir, I promise to behave and act accordingly. Will be a pleasure to help in any way. ...........Willing and able.....LeBaroness Msg#: 145 *ARENA* 09/26/88 19:48:59 (Read 15 Times) From: LORD BYRON To: THE BATWOMAN (Rcvd) Subj: REPLY TO MSG# 96 (APPOINTMENTS SO FAR) Objective?! You don't know what world you're even on, Space Cadet. Like I say, Jeppars and Elvis 'fans', A Confederacy of Dunces. Lord'Hahahahahahaha'Byron. Msg#: 146 *ARENA* 09/26/88 19:51:01 (Read 16 Times) From: LORD BYRON To: THE BATWOMAN (Rcvd) Subj: REPLY TO MSG# 97 (APPOINTMENTS SO FAR) 'Assit?' Woman you can even spell. How are you going to 'assit' the prosecuting attorney when you can't even spell. Lord'What an illiterate'Byron. Msg#: 174 *ARENA* 09/27/88 03:28:23 (Read 12 Times) From: PROMETHEUS REEBOK To: THE BATWOMAN (Rcvd) Subj: REPLY TO MSG# 97 (APPOINTMENTS SO FAR) I left an earlier message to the contrary, but, on second thought, I'd be pleased as punch to have you in my corner. Let's see if we can pull it off.... Msg#: 201 *ARENA* 09/27/88 10:28:54 (Read 12 Times) From: THE BATWOMAN To: LORD BYRON (Rcvd) Subj: REPLY TO MSG# 145 (APPOINTMENTS SO FAR) I can't figure out what world you're from . . . Sis Msg#: 202 *ARENA* 09/27/88 10:30:34 (Read 12 Times) From: THE BATWOMAN To: LORD BYRON (Rcvd) Subj: REPLY TO MSG# 146 (APPOINTMENTS SO FAR) Awwwwwww . . . Msg#: 204 *ARENA* 09/27/88 10:33:03 (Read 12 Times) From: THE BATWOMAN To: PROMETHEUS REEBOK (Rcvd) Subj: REPLY TO MSG# 174 (APPOINTMENTS SO FAR) Pull it off? (Meet me in the Cloakroom later . . . ) Well, de Judge says I can't help you. Maybe if someone would offer to assit (snicker) the defense, de Judge would let me assit you. (hmmmm . . . maybe I should forget what Mr. Sysop said over on Proper Positions.) It just goes to show how dirty minds can corrupt others. Hmph! Msg#: 216 *ARENA* 09/27/88 16:55:20 (Read 13 Times) From: LORD BYRON To: THE BATWOMAN (Rcvd) Subj: REPLY TO MSG# 201 (APPOINTMENTS SO FAR) This world, idiot! People do you see what happens to people who are on drugs? Batwoman is a good example of that. Lord'Just Say No'Byron. Msg#: 217 *ARENA* 09/27/88 16:57:35 (Read 13 Times) From: LORD BYRON To: THE BATWOMAN (Rcvd) Subj: REPLY TO MSG# 202 (APPOINTMENTS SO FAR) It looks like Bratwoman is feeling the same effects as that idiot, Prometheus. Speechlessness, can't say anything to defend themselves. Lord'The unstoppable'Byron. Msg#: 221 *ARENA* 09/27/88 17:05:54 (Read 13 Times) From: LORD BYRON To: PROMETHEUS REEBOK (Rcvd) Subj: REPLY TO MSG# 174 (APPOINTMENTS SO FAR) Don't worry Pro. Batwoman knows a lot about corners. Lord'The indestructible'Byron. Msg#: 281 *ARENA* 09/28/88 16:48:59 (Read 13 Times) From: THE BATWOMAN To: LORD BYRON (Rcvd) Subj: REPLY TO MSG# 216 (APPOINTMENTS SO FAR) All I can say is that you're in better company than I am . . . tbw Msg#: 282 *ARENA* 09/28/88 16:50:28 (Read 13 Times) From: THE BATWOMAN To: LORD BYRON (Rcvd) Subj: REPLY TO MSG# 217 (APPOINTMENTS SO FAR) It's just that some people lead real lives, ya know? tbw Msg#: 306 *ARENA* 09/28/88 19:54:09 (Read 16 Times) From: LORD BYRON To: THE BATWOMAN (Rcvd) Subj: REPLY TO MSG# 281 (APPOINTMENTS SO FAR) That's not saying much. Lord'Who isn't'Byron. Msg#: 307 *ARENA* 09/28/88 19:55:24 (Read 16 Times) From: LORD BYRON To: THE BATWOMAN (Rcvd) Subj: REPLY TO MSG# 282 (APPOINTMENTS SO FAR) If this is YOUR 'real life', you must be another freeloader off of Welfare now aren't you? Lord'Something must be done'Byron. Msg#: 383 *ARENA* 09/30/88 17:12:19 (Read 13 Times) From: THE BATWOMAN To: LORD BYRON (Rcvd) Subj: REPLY TO MSG# 307 (APPOINTMENTS SO FAR) Lordy, can't you even keep up with this message chain?? t 'refuse to have a battle of wits with an unarmed perthon' bw Msg#: 493 *ARENA* 10/02/88 01:48:01 (Read 13 Times) From: LORD BYRON To: THE BATWOMAN (Rcvd) Subj: REPLY TO MSG# 383 (APPOINTMENTS SO FAR) Sucker, I can keep up with an old hag like you anyday of the week. Lord'Keeps up with everything'Byron. Msg#: 535 *ARENA* 10/02/88 17:10:09 (Read 12 Times) From: THE BATWOMAN To: LORD BYRON (Rcvd) Subj: REPLY TO MSG# 493 (APPOINTMENTS SO FAR) See you in court, Lord Boring. tbw Msg#: 555 *ARENA* 10/02/88 18:42:30 (Read 12 Times) From: LORD BYRON To: THE BATWOMAN (Rcvd) Subj: REPLY TO MSG# 535 (APPOINTMENTS SO FAR) It looks more like a Kangaroo court. Whoever heard of biased jurors. Your sorry testimony will probably help my defense. Bye Fatwoman, I guess that cellulite and flab get to you in your VERY elderly days. Lord'Probably an old-maid too'Byron. Msg#: 63 *ARENA* 09/25/88 04:14:00 (Read 16 Times) From: PROMETHEUS REEBOK To: SYSOP (Rcvd) Subj: PROCEEDINGS I'd find it awfully handy to have a schedule of proceedings to refer to - stuff like who speaks when, etc. A sort of a scorecard, I guess, covering lineup from the opening remarks through the reading of the verdict and sentencing, if necessary. Got any Perry Mason episodes on video? Msg#: 69 *ARENA* 09/25/88 12:04:25 (Read 15 Times) From: SYSOP To: PROMETHEUS REEBOK (Rcvd) Subj: REPLY TO MSG# 63 (PROCEEDINGS) I don't need those... I've been studying mass murderers and serial killers now for 4 years, and know the trial process from voire dire' (jury selection) to the penalty phase of sentencing (which we don't have in Louisiana)... I plan to hold the trial as one LONG message chain, readable from front to back, and as witnesses are called (by the way, because of our limited number, the jury may also act as witnesses), only certain people may speak. I'll post a 'form' for our trial right before it begins... ***** Judge Sysop Msg#: 83 *ARENA* 09/25/88 21:02:37 (Read 14 Times) From: PROMETHEUS REEBOK To: SYSOP (Rcvd) Subj: REPLY TO MSG# 69 (PROCEEDINGS) It occurs to me that, because the message base has been reset, evidence will be darn hard to produce.... Msg#: 98 *ARENA* 09/26/88 08:49:12 (Read 14 Times) From: THE BATWOMAN To: SYSOP (Rcvd) Subj: REPLY TO MSG# 69 (PROCEEDINGS) I changed my mind. If I can't assist with the prosecution, I'll have to decline jury duty on the basis that I cannot be objective. Instead, I will be a witness for the prosecution, if Mr. Reebok wishes. Msg#: 99 *ARENA* 09/26/88 08:51:02 (Read 13 Times) From: THE BATWOMAN To: PROMETHEUS REEBOK (Rcvd) Subj: REPLY TO MSG# 83 (PROCEEDINGS) I haven't forgotten the defendant's crimes. I'll be a witness for you, if I can't help prosecute. Msg#: 110 *ARENA* 09/26/88 12:18:25 (Read 12 Times) From: SYSOP To: PROMETHEUS REEBOK (Rcvd) Subj: REPLY TO MSG# 83 (PROCEEDINGS) No need to worry... I well remember messages to and from the defendent, and will accept paraphrasing... ***** Sysop The Judge Msg#: 114 *ARENA* 09/26/88 12:25:32 (Read 13 Times) From: SYSOP To: THE BATWOMAN (Rcvd) Subj: REPLY TO MSG# 98 (PROCEEDINGS) So you feel you can't be objective at all? That doesn't sound like you... how about this, then: if you'd not be a juror with free communications with Prosecutor Reebok in Email and witness rights, I certainly agree to you being a witness with those same free rights of prosecution... I cannot guarrantee that you'll have the same freedom to post, however, that you'd have as a witness... I WILL be enforcing proper courtroom procedure, and would have to have you dismissed from the courtroom if you disrupted the trial with repeated outbursts... I'm allowing Cheap Shot to be Reporter/Jester and Le Baroness to be Heckler, but I won't allow an overabundance of mirth. ***** 'whatever your decision, you're welcome here' Sysop Msg#: 124 *ARENA* 09/26/88 16:44:44 (Read 14 Times) From: FLASH FIRE To: SYSOP (Rcvd) Subj: REPLY TO MSG# 114 (PROCEEDINGS) Will the Jurers be able to express themselves using asides on the message base. Just curious . . Flash ' burn em at the stake ' Fire . Msg#: 134 *ARENA* 09/26/88 18:02:57 (Read 17 Times) From: CAPTAIN ZINGER To: SYSOP (Rcvd) Subj: REPLY TO MSG# 110 (PROCEEDINGS) I must (gulp) offer up a pre-trial motion for dismissal on the grounds that all evidence available is strictly hearsay. That being t he case there is no basis for binding over the defendant for trial. Further, I see that the bailiff has a pet Kangaroo hidden in the prosecuting attorney's refrigerator, and that casts a strong prejudicial bias. Do you wish to delete this msg(y/n)? N Msg#: 147 *ARENA* 09/26/88 19:53:46 (Read 16 Times) From: LORD BYRON To: THE BATWOMAN (Rcvd) Subj: REPLY TO MSG# 98 (PROCEEDINGS) Well it sure is better than 'assiting' the prosecutor now isn't it. Yeah, you're a witness of how much I made you a fool on the other Batboard. Lord'Need more time'Byron. Msg#: 148 *ARENA* 09/26/88 19:56:28 (Read 15 Times) From: LORD BYRON To: FLASH FIRE (Rcvd) Subj: REPLY TO MSG# 124 (PROCEEDINGS) The only 'burning' that there will be is me burning up the prosecution. Lord'I hate 300 baud Dammit!'Byron. Msg#: 151 *ARENA* 09/26/88 23:14:03 (Read 13 Times) From: FLASH FIRE To: LORD BYRON (Rcvd) Subj: REPLY TO MSG# 148 (PROCEEDINGS) Kind (as he said while big G R I N on face) sir you have proven that burning would be too good for you. Electrocution at 24 volts might do the trick. Yea, thats the ticket, 24 volts at 300 baud, it should take a long, loonngg time. . . Flash 'the most unbiased Jurer in town' lectric Fire Msg#: 175 *ARENA* 09/27/88 03:33:17 (Read 12 Times) From: PROMETHEUS REEBOK To: THE BATWOMAN (Rcvd) Subj: REPLY TO MSG# 99 (PROCEEDINGS) I aim to have you assist me, if not share the duties as co-counsel.... Msg#: 176 *ARENA* 09/27/88 03:34:49 (Read 12 Times) From: PROMETHEUS REEBOK To: SYSOP (Rcvd) Subj: REPLY TO MSG# 110 (PROCEEDINGS) The defendant has been most cooperative in continuing his brash behavior, and I am confident that I'll have no short supply of evidence Msg#: 178 *ARENA* 09/27/88 03:41:47 (Read 13 Times) From: PROMETHEUS REEBOK To: CAPTAIN ZINGER (Rcvd) Subj: REPLY TO MSG# 134 (PROCEEDINGS) The evidence continues to mount with every utterance your client makes. As a professional courtesy, may I recommend that you advise your client to remain quiet for the remainder of the proceedings? As for the kangaroo, she's a pet. Besides, what's inside my refrigerator is my own business (mostly). Do you wish to delete this msg(y/n)? N Msg#: 197 *ARENA* 09/27/88 10:17:21 (Read 11 Times) From: THE BATWOMAN To: SYSOP (Rcvd) Subj: REPLY TO MSG# 114 (PROCEEDINGS) Wouldn't it be up to Mr. Reebok to decide whether or not I'd be a good witness for his case? Since I never participated (or even watched) one of these Courts of Last Resort, I may be mistaken in some things. Guide me, O Masked Man! Msg#: 198 *ARENA* 09/27/88 10:22:06 (Read 12 Times) From: THE BATWOMAN To: FLASH FIRE (Rcvd) Subj: REPLY TO MSG# 151 (PROCEEDINGS) oooooooooooOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOooooooooooooooooo!!!!! Msg#: 203 *ARENA* 09/27/88 10:31:16 (Read 12 Times) From: THE BATWOMAN To: LORD BYRON (Rcvd) Subj: REPLY TO MSG# 147 (PROCEEDINGS) Awwwwwwwwwwww, some more. Msg#: 205 *ARENA* 09/27/88 10:37:52 (Read 12 Times) From: THE BATWOMAN To: PROMETHEUS REEBOK (Rcvd) Subj: REPLY TO MSG# 175 (PROCEEDINGS) Well. What do de Judge say about dis? Hope to assit you soon. sis Msg#: 209 *ARENA* 09/27/88 15:49:12 (Read 13 Times) From: LE BARONESS To: PROMETHEUS REEBOK (Rcvd) Subj: REPLY TO MSG# 178 (PROCEEDINGS) Court Heckler present and accounted for. For everyone's imformation Captain Zinger keeps a pet frog in his pocket to keep him occupied. Hooray for the sneaker and Boo Hiss for the zinger . . Le......on cruise control.....Baroness Msg#: 210 *ARENA* 09/27/88 15:55:00 (Read 13 Times) From: LE BARONESS To: LORD BYRON (Rcvd) Subj: REPLY TO MSG# 147 (PROCEEDINGS) Speaking of illiterates look in the mirror Boo Hiss. Msg#: 213 *ARENA* 09/27/88 16:46:58 (Read 14 Times) From: LORD BYRON To: PROMETHEUS REEBOK (Rcvd) Subj: REPLY TO MSG# 178 (PROCEEDINGS) The only kangaroo that there will be is me stomping all over you, sucker! It says ADULT Verbal battles, so why don't you leave kid. Elvis is dead!!! Lord'Tear you into pieces, boy'Byron. Msg#: 218 *ARENA* 09/27/88 16:59:50 (Read 13 Times) From: LORD BYRON To: THE BATWOMAN (Rcvd) Subj: REPLY TO MSG# 203 (PROCEEDINGS) Poor Bratwoman, I'm hurting her feelings. Do I care? Lord'Hell No!'Byron. Msg#: 219 *ARENA* 09/27/88 17:01:00 (Read 13 Times) From: LORD BYRON To: LE BARONESS (Rcvd) Subj: REPLY TO MSG# 210 (PROCEEDINGS) Say Barren Ass, if I wanted your opinion, I'd give to you. You're not 'boohissing' anyone, sucker! Lord'Need I say more'Byron. Msg#: 220 *ARENA* 09/27/88 17:03:04 (Read 14 Times) From: LORD BYRON To: FLASH FIRE (Rcvd) Subj: REPLY TO MSG# 151 (PROCEEDINGS) Keep on dreaming, you people aren't doing jack to me. I need some real competition. I wonder why they call you Flash, the way you're talking, there's not much to flash. Lord'Who's next'Byron. Msg#: 222 *ARENA* 09/27/88 17:08:20 (Read 12 Times) From: LORD BYRON To: PROMETHEUS REEBOK (Rcvd) Subj: REPLY TO MSG# 176 (PROCEEDINGS) Yeah, you have enough evidence of how I've been humiliating you, boy. Elvis is dead! Jeppars never was. Lord'Try to stop me'Byron. Msg#: 226 *ARENA* 09/27/88 20:02:17 (Read 13 Times) From: PROMETHEUS REEBOK To: LE BARONESS (Rcvd) Subj: REPLY TO MSG# 209 (PROCEEDINGS) Thanks for the support! Msg#: 227 *ARENA* 09/27/88 20:07:45 (Read 12 Times) From: PROMETHEUS REEBOK To: THE BATWOMAN (Rcvd) Subj: REPLY TO MSG# 205 (PROCEEDINGS) De Judge ain't said nothin' 'bout it, yet. Msg#: 233 *ARENA* 09/27/88 20:43:37 (Read 12 Times) From: SYSOP To: FLASH FIRE (Rcvd) Subj: REPLY TO MSG# 124 (PROCEEDINGS) Flash, I'm thinking that we may set up private messages on this sig... therefore, no need to retreat to Email... BUT, just like a real court, there are to be no remarks HERE... as for discussing the trial on the General Ranting sig, have at it! What would a trial be without publicity? ***** Sysop The Judge Msg#: 236 *ARENA* 09/27/88 20:56:15 (Read 14 Times) From: SYSOP To: CAPTAIN ZINGER (Rcvd) Subj: REPLY TO MSG# 134 (PROCEEDINGS) Counselor Zinger, your motion to dismiss is overruled, since we have several eyewitnesses who can personally attest to the alleged indiscretions of your client. "There need be no body to prove murder" - no documentation is required, and the evidence is admissable. I must warn your client - Lord Byron, your attention please - that he is not allowed to speak during the actual trial EXCEPT when on the witness stand. If he chooses continue with his comments, then I must forcibly remove him from the sig... (read-only priviledges) When I officially sequester the jury, NO posts will be allowed here other than the Prosecuting counsel, Defense counsel, witnesses and the Court Reporter and Jester... please observe this rule, and I think everyone here will enjoy themselves! Of course, other message strings may be posted here... and Byron, you are free to engage in verbal warfare on OTHER message strings besides the official court message chain I am building tonight... (so YES, you will be able to continue with the Arena as it was originally, IF you do not interfere with the trial.) ***** Sysop The Judge Do you wish to delete this msg(y/n)? N Msg#: 244 *ARENA* 09/27/88 21:26:55 (Read 14 Times) From: SYSOP To: PROMETHEUS REEBOK (Rcvd) Subj: REPLY TO MSG# 175 (PROCEEDINGS) Ok, since I've a healthy respect for BatWoman's presence of mind and good sense... as well as her fairness... AND I like to keep my members happy... You may be allowed the position of assistant to the Prosecutor, but you will NOT be allowed to take the stand as a witness. (Can't have you doing EVERYTHING, you know... then you get called The Judge) You will, of course, still be a juror... is this acceptable? ***** Sysop Msg#: 246 *ARENA* 09/27/88 21:32:18 (Read 12 Times) From: SYSOP To: THE BATWOMAN (Rcvd) Subj: REPLY TO MSG# 197 (PROCEEDINGS) As in actual criminal proceedings, Prosecutor Reebok will decide whom he will call to the stand, examine and cross-examine. ***** Sysop The Judge Msg#: 257 *ARENA* 09/27/88 22:32:29 (Read 14 Times) From: FLASH FIRE To: LORD BYRON (Rcvd) Subj: REPLY TO MSG# 220 (PROCEEDINGS) You wanna see Flash. Wait till I flash the verdict in your face. Sysop, May I please be appointed Jury Foreman so's I can read the verdict. Msg#: 272 *ARENA* 09/28/88 13:38:38 (Read 14 Times) From: LE BARONESS To: LORD BYRON (Rcvd) Subj: REPLY TO MSG# 219 (PROCEEDINGS) Want to bet, Boo hiss so there. What ya gonna do about it??? The official court heckler can boo hiss any time she wants. Msg#: 273 *ARENA* 09/28/88 13:41:11 (Read 14 Times) From: LE BARONESS To: PROMETHEUS REEBOK (Rcvd) Subj: REPLY TO MSG# 226 (PROCEEDINGS) You're welcome. Msg#: 283 *ARENA* 09/28/88 16:54:00 (Read 13 Times) From: THE BATWOMAN To: LORD BYRON (Rcvd) Subj: REPLY TO MSG# 218 (PROCEEDINGS) Moi? You wouldn't say that if you were conscious. Msg#: 284 *ARENA* 09/28/88 17:07:57 (Read 13 Times) From: THE BATWOMAN To: PROMETHEUS REEBOK (Rcvd) Subj: REPLY TO MSG# 227 (PROCEEDINGS) Well. Musta been in E-Mail Msg#: 286 *ARENA* 09/28/88 17:36:22 (Read 14 Times) From: CAPTAIN ZINGER To: PROMETHEUS REEBOK (Rcvd) Subj: REPLY TO MSG# 178 (PROCEEDINGS) Thank you. I have been locked in the closet with my frog, and have been unable to meet with my client. I object that this court has allowed the accused to have contact with the jury before the trial has started and thereby request a change of venue to a court wherein private conferences are possible. May I please see the prosecutor and his honor at the bench? Do you wish to delete this msg(y/n)? N Msg#: 328 *ARENA* *PRIVATE* 09/29/88 17:37:50 (Read 2 Times) From: CAPTAIN ZINGER To: PROMETHEUS REEBOK (Rcvd) Subj: REPLY TO MSG# 63 (PROCEEDINGS) I wholeheartedly second this motion and plead for immediate relief. Not knowing who is to speak with what and when is hampering the defense efforts. As I make this post, I am up for an opening argument, but am awaiting SYSOP's acknowlegement of YOURs and announcem nt of mine, but I still need to plead my client Not Guilty in response to message #2 asked before I became counsel for the defense. So, I'm doing that before I give opening arguments in the trial. And until tomorrow, will assume sysop will respond to your opener ad ask for mine. Schedule WOULD be nice, your Honor oh great cowled one sir. Do you wish to delete this msg(y/n)? N Msg#: 139 *ARENA* 09/26/88 19:11:52 (Read 14 Times) From: ALAN JENNINGS To: SYSOP THE BATMAN Subj: THE SWEARING PART Upon what holy tome will be put the hand of the testamentors by the bailiff? Rev. 'just HAVE to know, just HAVE to ask' Jennings, D.D. (what holy books are recognized here, anyway?) Msg#: 150 *ARENA* 09/26/88 23:11:42 (Read 12 Times) From: FLASH FIRE To: ALAN JENNINGS (Rcvd) Subj: REPLY TO MSG# 139 (THE SWEARING PART) And who pray tell is this new Rev. intruding in the arena????????? Msg#: 177 *ARENA* 09/27/88 03:38:11 (Read 11 Times) From: PROMETHEUS REEBOK To: ALAN JENNINGS (Rcvd) Subj: REPLY TO MSG# 139 (THE SWEARING PART) I've got an extra copy of "The Electric Kool Aid Acid Test" we could use. Msg#: 214 *ARENA* 09/27/88 16:50:05 (Read 13 Times) From: LORD BYRON To: ALAN JENNINGS (Rcvd) Subj: REPLY TO MSG# 139 (THE SWEARING PART) I hope The Bill of Rights. Lord'Some people don't believe in it around here'Byron. Msg#: 237 *ARENA* 09/27/88 21:09:11 (Read 11 Times) From: SYSOP To: ALAN JENNINGS (Rcvd) Subj: REPLY TO MSG# 139 (THE SWEARING PART) We'll use the TBBS Version 1.3 owner's manual, Reverend. ***** Sysop The Judge Msg#: 256 *ARENA* 09/27/88 22:28:40 (Read 12 Times) From: FLASH FIRE To: LORD BYRON (Rcvd) Subj: REPLY TO MSG# 214 (THE SWEARING PART) Well lookee here. The ferocious Lordy Byron hoping that we use the bill of ro rights around here.Is the mighty one allreeady breaking under the strain. Hey Judge kindly inform our Lordy swaetin it out Byron that the only rights around here are the ones you so deem. . . Flash ''cryin over spilt milk dont help'' Fire Msg#: 259 *ARENA* 09/27/88 23:06:23 (Read 12 Times) From: SYSOP To: FLASH FIRE (Rcvd) Subj: REPLY TO MSG# 256 (THE SWEARING PART) Flash, you are indeed correct - I will enforce my decision no matter what - but I should also point out that I do indeed try to uphold the freedoms of speech granted us here on The Batboard. What this particular trial in the Court of Last Resort will decide is whether or not Lord Byron has abused his freedoms enough to do damage to the rights of others... ***** Sysop The Judge Msg#: 303 *ARENA* 09/28/88 19:45:16 (Read 17 Times) From: LORD BYRON To: FLASH FIRE (Rcvd) Subj: REPLY TO MSG# 256 (THE SWEARING PART) Sucker, you'll never seeing me jumping on the bandwagon and kissing up to other people. You better go back into hiding before I hurt you some more. I think your shirt is stopping blood circulation to your brain. Because I know you want me to make a fool out of you. Lord'Flash, the wimp'Byron. Msg#: 167 *ARENA* 09/27/88 00:25:13 (Read 11 Times) From: MIKE GRAHAM To: SYSOP (Rcvd) Subj: TRIAL I'm a latecomer here. Guess all that's left for me is courtroom spectator, eh? Msg#: 242 *ARENA* 09/27/88 21:22:54 (Read 14 Times) From: SYSOP To: MIKE GRAHAM (Rcvd) Subj: REPLY TO MSG# 167 (TRIAL) Certainly not... you're more than welcome to be a juror and witness! Do you accept? ***** Sysop The Judge Msg#: 605 *ARENA* 10/03/88 11:18:17 (Read 11 Times) From: MIKE GRAHAM To: SYSOP (Rcvd) Subj: REPLY TO MSG# 242 (TRIAL) Sure, I accept. Why not? Msg#: 168 *ARENA* 09/27/88 02:01:32 (Read 11 Times) From: JOHANN SCHMAT To: SYSOP (Rcvd) Subj: APPOINTMENTS SO FAR I accept. Johann Schmat HAIL ERIS ALL HAIL DISCORDIA JOHANN SCHMAT,EPISKOPOS-COSMIC REBEL BRIGADE Msg#: 243 *ARENA* 09/27/88 21:23:48 (Read 13 Times) From: SYSOP To: JOHANN SCHMAT (Rcvd) Subj: REPLY TO MSG# 168 (APPOINTMENTS SO FAR) My thanks, good Johann... you'll be an invaluable addition... ***** Sysop The Judge Msg#: 179 *ARENA* 09/27/88 03:44:58 (Read 11 Times) From: PROMETHEUS REEBOK To: SYSOP (Rcvd) Subj: CO-COUNSEL Your honor, I respectfully request that The Batwoman be allowed to serve as Co-counsel in the case of Batboard Users vs. Lord Byron. I can think of no better way in which justice may be served, and I anxiously await your ruling on this matter. Msg#: 245 *ARENA* 09/27/88 21:30:33 (Read 12 Times) From: SYSOP To: PROMETHEUS REEBOK (Rcvd) Subj: REPLY TO MSG# 179 (CO-COUNSEL) As mentioned in my previous post, if BatWoman agrees she may act as your assistant, and as juror... but may NOT take the stand. ***** Sysop The Judge Msg#: 247 *ARENA* 09/27/88 21:37:18 (Read 14 Times) From: SYSOP To: ALL Subj: THE BATBOARD VS. LORD BYRON I AM NOW OFFICIALLY SEQUESTERING THE JURY AND CLOSING THE COURTROOM. ALL FURTHER MESSAGES IN *THIS* REPLY STRING MUST BE FROM TRIAL PARTICIPANTS. ANY IMPROPER MESSAGE POSTED WILL RESULT IN DELETION - REPEATED VIOLATIONS WILL RESULT IN THAT MEMBER'S BEING RULED 'OUT OF ORDER' AND BEING EXPELLED FROM THE COURTROOM. As called previously by the Bailiff, our first trial places the defendent Lord Byron responsible for "crimes against the userlog" - the Court interprets this to mean "an absence of general good taste, courtesy and care for fellow members". Prosecutor Reebok, you may now relate your opening argument. I will expect the next post to be from you (or the Court Reporter, who will be saving this string for posterity, or Court Jester and Heckler). You have a maximum of three days to answer before you default your opening comments and Defense counselor Captain Zinger has his turn. Prosecutor, you may begin. ***** Sysop The Judge Msg#: 323 *ARENA* 09/29/88 16:47:12 (Read 18 Times) From: PROMETHEUS REEBOK To: SYSOP (Rcvd) Subj: REPLY TO MSG# 247 (THE BATBOARD VS. LORD BYRON) Your Honor, members of the jury, esteemed counsel for the Defense: We are convened on this message string to begin the trial of Lord Byron, accused of "crimes against the userlog." The Court, in it's wisdom, has construed this charge to denote "an absence of general good taste, courtesy and care for fellow members." Friends, you will see that the evidence is clearly overwhelming. The Defendant has not denied the charge, preferring, it appears, to plead "Guilty, but so what?" Fellow Users, I must admit that I find the Defendant's attitude abhorrent. Lord Byron will attempt to justify his pernicious behavior as an expression of his right to freedom of speech. But what, I ask, of our rights to freedom FROM speech? I contend that each User's rights have been trampled by the Defendant's brash disreguard for simple, human, courtesy. "Freedom," Clarence Darrow said, "comes from human beings, rather than from laws and institutions." Are we to allow Lord Byron to continue his surly attacks, to defend his humorless savagery with his dim understanding of basic human rights? My Friends, I say that this would be a gross miscarriage of justice. I urge you to read carefully the proceedings, and to conclude, for yourselves, that Lord Byron must be found guilty as charged. PROMETHEUS REEBOK, Prosecutor Msg#: 338 *ARENA* 09/29/88 18:29:38 (Read 17 Times) From: SYSOP To: PROMETHEUS REEBOK (Rcvd) Subj: REPLY TO MSG# 323 (THE BATBOARD VS. LORD BYRON) Thank you, Prosecutor. Now I call on the Defense counsel for his response and opening argument. ***** Sysop The Judge Msg#: 377 *ARENA* 09/30/88 11:06:13 (Read 17 Times) From: LORD BYRON To: PROMETHEUS REEBOK (Rcvd) Subj: REPLY TO MSG# 323 (THE BATBOARD VS. LORD BYRON) Aww...You think that I hurt every body's rights. Do I care? Hell no! You can't do anything to stop it either so keep on crying, kid. I'm not close to being through. Yeah, look at Prometheus, saw a couple of shows of The People's Court and now he thinks he's a lawyer. You better come up with more than that boy. Hey, I only insult who think they're good enough to stop me and soon find out that they were wrong. Keep on going Pro, I'm getting a good laugh out of you and this 'trial'. Lord'Hahahahahahahaha'Byron. Msg#: 423 *ARENA* 09/30/88 20:21:46 (Read 16 Times) From: SYSOP To: LORD BYRON (Rcvd) Subj: REPLY TO MSG# 377 (THE BATBOARD VS. LORD BYRON) Would the defendent rise, please. Mr. Byron, I must take a moment to warn you against another outburst of this kind. Prosecutor Reebok will not answer you, and I might point out that you'll be doing yourself more harm than good. Please confine your further comments on the case to OTHER message strings than THIS one... or I will be forced to decrease your access here in the Arena to read-only. I will not offer another chance. ***** Sysop The Judge Msg#: 638 *ARENA* 10/03/88 18:57:21 (Read 14 Times) From: CAPTAIN ZINGER To: SYSOP (Rcvd) Subj: REPLY TO MSG# 338 (THE BATBOARD VS. LORD BYRON) Your honor, Mr Prometheosecutor, Ladies, Gentlemen, Members of the Jury, Hecklers, reporters, and Assorted Superheroes: Before I begin my opening statement, I wish to protest the treatment I have received at the hands of some unknown assailant for the past two days. As soon as I left your chambers, your honor, I was accosted by two large hulking women and thrown into a closet with nothing but my little pet frog and two moist (but CLEAN, thank god) towels. Someone threw a ham sandwich over the transom to me yesterday and I appreciate it. But I would certainly like for you to help me get to the bottom of this and keep this sort of thing from happening again until the trial is over. I also add for the record two objections. I object to the open communications between the esteemed prosecutor and your honor outside this courtroom and observable by the jury as well as the general public. Secondly, I object to the age of the ham served by the little birdy-looking man with the dark glasses at the refreshment stand downstairs. Now, for the good part: The defense asserts the incense of the accused to any crimes and respectfully rejects any notions to the contrary despite the esteemin which I hold those who make, state, and bring these charges. Thus, we will show this case to be a frivolous exercise in fertility, we will assert the defendants right to claim damages from his unjust ammusors, and listen carefully to all that is said here and make our case for the defense after the Prometheosecution rests his weary and tired case against my amused and masterbated client. (that should be "abused and mistreated client" your horner. Do you wish to delete this msg(y/n)? N Msg#: 665 *ARENA* 10/04/88 00:18:39 (Read 17 Times) From: SYSOP To: CAPTAIN ZINGER (Rcvd) Subj: REPLY TO MSG# 638 (THE BATBOARD VS. LORD BYRON) Uh-huh. Let the record show that Defense Counsel Zinger has presented a - well, a unique - statement attempting to prove his client has been damaged by the other occupants of this sig. I will not take the case to which you referred - I assume you are planning a civil counter-suit against other members of the bbs - until this case has been completed. Your objection to my conversations with the Prosecutor OUTSIDE of the Courtroom have been noted, and since they were precisely that - OUTSIDE this room - I will continue them. Now, Prosecutor Reebok, you may present your case. ***** Sysop Do you wish to delete this msg(y/n)? N Msg#: 673 *ARENA* *PRIVATE* Msg#: 692 *ARENA* *PRIVATE* Msg#: 708 *ARENA* *PRIVATE* Msg#: 727 *ARENA* *PRIVATE* Msg#: 775 *ARENA* 10/05/88 16:51:29 (Read 9 Times) From: CAPTAIN ZINGER To: SYSOP (Rcvd) Subj: REPLY TO MSG# 665 (THE BATBOARD VS. LORD BYRON) Excuse me, your honor, but the objection is not only raised as to where the conversations are held but also who is able to witness them. Therefore for the record and with all due respect, I take exception to the ruling. Do you wish to delete this msg(y/n)? N Msg#: 260 *ARENA* 09/27/88 23:10:13 (Read 11 Times) From: SYSOP To: FLASH FIRE (Rcvd) Subj: REPLY TO MSG# 257 (PROCEEDINGS) You are so appointed, Juror Flash... ***** Sysop The Judge Msg#: 268 *ARENA* 09/28/88 10:12:20 (Read 12 Times) From: FLASH FIRE To: SYSOP (Rcvd) Subj: REPLY TO MSG# 260 (PROCEEDINGS) Sysop, accidentally deleted Msg 260, can you fix it?? Msg#: 274 *ARENA* 09/28/88 14:34:51 (Read 12 Times) From: SYSOP To: FLASH FIRE (Rcvd) Subj: REPLY TO MSG# 268 (PROCEEDINGS) Will do so right now... ***** Sysop Msg#: 285 *ARENA* 09/28/88 17:11:14 (Read 12 Times) From: THE BATWOMAN To: SYSOP (Rcvd) Subj: REPLY TO MSG# 244 (PROCEEDINGS) Mr. Sysop, sir, I mean, Your Honor, Sir! Is the message you left Mr. Reebok for him or for me or half for him and half for me? soooooo confused . . . Msg#: 331 *ARENA* 09/29/88 18:11:18 (Read 14 Times) From: SYSOP To: THE BATWOMAN (Rcvd) Subj: REPLY TO MSG# 285 (PROCEEDINGS) I guess it was all for you... simply letting you know the terms of your assistance to Prosecutor Reebok... ***** Sysop Msg#: 385 *ARENA* 09/30/88 17:20:17 (Read 12 Times) From: THE BATWOMAN To: SYSOP (Rcvd) Subj: REPLY TO MSG# 331 (PROCEEDINGS) Well. You see what happens when you mix your users, I hope. tbw Msg#: 287 *ARENA* 09/28/88 17:42:30 (Read 11 Times) From: CAPTAIN ZINGER To: SYSOP (Rcvd) Subj: REPLY TO MSG# 236 (PROCEEDINGS) Now just a minute. I must INSIST that my client and I be allowed to talk privately in the courtroom. To silence him in open court, tough would not only be acceptable, it would be preferable! Do you wish to delete this msg(y/n)? N Msg#: 301 *ARENA* 09/28/88 19:39:33 (Read 14 Times) From: LORD BYRON To: LE BARONESS (Rcvd) Subj: REPLY TO MSG# 272 (PROCEEDINGS) More like Court idiot to me. If you're a she, why do you have La instead of Le. Don't tell me you've a sex operation. What do they call you're kind, morphodites? More like morphodykes in your case. Boohiss yourself, tramp. Lord'Are we having fun yet?'Byron. Msg#: 360 *ARENA* 09/29/88 22:51:20 (Read 12 Times) From: LE BARONESS To: LORD BYRON (Rcvd) Subj: REPLY TO MSG# 301 (PROCEEDINGS) Okay pea brain. You only wish, you must be referring to yourself or your girlfriend huh????? I thought you could do better than that. Msg#: 379 *ARENA* 09/30/88 11:20:37 (Read 11 Times) From: LORD BYRON To: LE BARONESS (Rcvd) Subj: REPLY TO MSG# 360 (PROCEEDINGS) Pea brain, my my my, can you do better than that Barren Ass. You're also like Batwoman. When you're getting put down, you start getting emotional. That's a bad characteristic going against someone so unemotional as me. Why don't you go back to your dog house, dog before I kick you some more. Lord'Give that dog a bone'Byron. Msg#: 386 *ARENA* 09/30/88 17:23:43 (Read 12 Times) From: THE BATWOMAN To: LE BARONESS (Rcvd) Subj: REPLY TO MSG# 360 (PROCEEDINGS) Don't worry, Baroness. Lordy got it backwards, anyway. Msg#: 387 *ARENA* 09/30/88 17:25:39 (Read 12 Times) From: THE BATWOMAN To: LORD BYRON (Rcvd) Subj: REPLY TO MSG# 379 (PROCEEDINGS) I have a minute to spare. Go ahead. Tell me everything you know. t 'hugs and kisses' bw Msg#: 436 *ARENA* 10/01/88 00:11:21 (Read 14 Times) From: LE BARONESS To: THE BATWOMAN (Rcvd) Subj: REPLY TO MSG# 386 (PROCEEDINGS) Yeah I was aware of that but let it slide. It wouldn't have done any good to call his attention to that fact he has a short memory span. Msg#: 463 *ARENA* 10/01/88 14:26:07 (Read 13 Times) From: PROMETHEUS REEBOK To: THE BATWOMAN (Rcvd) Subj: REPLY TO MSG# 387 (PROCEEDINGS) No need to stir him up, Sis - he's doing fine all by himself. Msg#: 495 *ARENA* 10/02/88 01:53:35 (Read 13 Times) From: LORD BYRON To: THE BATWOMAN (Rcvd) Subj: REPLY TO MSG# 386 (PROCEEDINGS) 'Lordy' has nothing backwards. You bunch of dykes. Lord'I hate Lezzies'Byron. Msg#: 496 *ARENA* 10/02/88 01:55:22 (Read 13 Times) From: LORD BYRON To: THE BATWOMAN (Rcvd) Subj: REPLY TO MSG# 387 (PROCEEDINGS) Woman, it would take years to tell you everything that I know. It doesn't look like you have many left. Everybody knows you're going through menopause so don't hide it. Lord'Everyone knows'Byron. Msg#: 497 *ARENA* 10/02/88 01:57:19 (Read 13 Times) From: LORD BYRON To: PROMETHEUS REEBOK (Rcvd) Subj: REPLY TO MSG# 463 (PROCEEDINGS) Amateur, why don't you go back to The People's Court before I have to hurt your feelings, punk. It would give me too much pleasure. Lord'You can't stand the heat, sucker'Byron. Msg#: 534 *ARENA* 10/02/88 17:08:00 (Read 12 Times) From: THE BATWOMAN To: PROMETHEUS REEBOK (Rcvd) Subj: REPLY TO MSG# 463 (PROCEEDINGS) Yep, you're right. Msg#: 539 *ARENA* 10/02/88 17:19:33 (Read 15 Times) From: THE BATWOMAN To: LE BARONESS (Rcvd) Subj: REPLY TO MSG# 436 (PROCEEDINGS) I know! If you reply to one of his messages, he doesn't seem able to remember the subject, and replies with some off-the-wall response. You're just left wondering what nuclear power plant his mother walked by, ya know? tbw Msg#: 557 *ARENA* 10/02/88 18:50:07 (Read 14 Times) From: LORD BYRON To: THE BATWOMAN (Rcvd) Subj: REPLY TO MSG# 539 (PROCEEDINGS) Hey I heard there's a new movie starring Batwoman and Le Barren Ass called... L E S B I A N L U S T ! Watch them doing what they do best. Masturbating with each other. Lord'Pro's the director or is that erector'Byron. Msg#: 575 *ARENA* 10/02/88 23:17:41 (Read 14 Times) From: LE BARONESS To: THE BATWOMAN (Rcvd) Subj: REPLY TO MSG# 539 (PROCEEDINGS) Well done Batwoman, You have his character down pat. Msg#: 588 *ARENA* 10/03/88 08:31:01 (Read 12 Times) From: THE BATWOMAN To: LE BARONESS (Rcvd) Subj: REPLY TO MSG# 575 (PROCEEDINGS) You've seen his reply to our comments. Such a lack of class and style as I've never before seen anywhere. No sense of humor, either. Oh, well. His days are numbered. The gallows loom ever closer for the Lord of all that's Boring. Until then, I'll not let him drag me down to his level of depravity. I also have my position as assistant to the prosecuting attorney to consider. It would not be ethical conduct on my part to continue to engage in pointless and meaningless debate with him. It's not worth my time to argue with an imbecile in any case. tbw Msg#: 618 *ARENA* 10/03/88 13:13:27 (Read 14 Times) From: LORD BYRON To: THE BATWOMAN (Rcvd) Subj: REPLY TO MSG# 588 (PROCEEDINGS) You wish that was the case, slut. You can't reply because you have nothing witty to say. I see you and Barren Ass always interacting with each other. Why don't you both go to San Francisco. You'll both fit in good over there. Lord'I hate lesbians'Byron. Msg#: 625 *ARENA* 10/03/88 13:52:43 (Read 16 Times) From: LE BARONESS To: THE BATWOMAN (Rcvd) Subj: REPLY TO MSG# 588 (PROCEEDINGS) I agree. I plan to just ignore him. He's only convincing me he's guilty as charged. Msg#: 308 *ARENA* 09/28/88 19:57:24 (Read 15 Times) From: LORD BYRON To: THE BATWOMAN (Rcvd) Subj: REPLY TO MSG# 283 (PROCEEDINGS) Does conciousness have any implications in this? No. So keep on trying, sucker! Lord'She or It is beginning to bore me'Byron. Msg#: 384 *ARENA* 09/30/88 17:15:04 (Read 12 Times) From: THE BATWOMAN To: LORD BYRON (Rcvd) Subj: REPLY TO MSG# 308 (PROCEEDINGS) Just as I suspected. Oh, Nurse! Byron has been spitting out his medicine again! t 'for shame, for shame' bw Msg#: 494 *ARENA* 10/02/88 01:49:17 (Read 13 Times) From: LORD BYRON To: THE BATWOMAN (Rcvd) Subj: REPLY TO MSG# 384 (PROCEEDINGS) Woman, have you just had Geritol already. Hope so, I like kicking old hags in the head. Lord'For the fun of it'Byron. Msg#: 309 *ARENA* 09/28/88 19:59:37 (Read 16 Times) From: LORD BYRON To: FLASH FIRE (Rcvd) Subj: REPLY TO MSG# 257 (PROCEEDINGS) Oh boy, I'm really scared of you. I'm shaking in my boots. You had better do better than that boy. I already know what the verdict is going to be because of these ninnebabies around here not taking the heat. Lord'Get out of the kitchen'Byron. Msg#: 315 *ARENA* 09/29/88 03:12:21 (Read 15 Times) From: PROMETHEUS REEBOK To: SYSOP (Rcvd) Subj: REPLY TO MSG# 244 (PROCEEDINGS) Gee, is it fair to allow her to assist me AND be a juror? I'd like the assistance, but I hate to stack the deck so heavily. Msg#: 322 *ARENA* 09/29/88 16:38:58 (Read 14 Times) From: LORD BYRON To: PROMETHEUS REEBOK (Rcvd) Subj: REPLY TO MSG# 315 (PROCEEDINGS) Hell no, that's not fair. This whole trial isn't fair. Just a bunch of goody-goody suckers who got their feelings hurt and wants me stopped. Sorry, this trial won't stop me. You'll find out soon enough(sneer). Lord'The devious one'Byron. Msg#: 337 *ARENA* 09/29/88 18:25:18 (Read 14 Times) From: SYSOP To: PROMETHEUS REEBOK (Rcvd) Subj: REPLY TO MSG# 315 (PROCEEDINGS) As mentioned before, I consider her an eminently fair person, and honestly believe her capable of helping you arrange a case while separating herself as a juror to objectively decide Bryon's innocence or guilt. We are also a bit low on juror material... I want enough people to make a good cross-section. The jury MUST come to a unanimous decision, as in real life... I'm counting on anyone who feels Lord Byron to be in the right will stand up for him. ***** Sysop The Judge Msg#: 355 *ARENA* 09/29/88 21:20:47 (Read 12 Times) From: FLASH FIRE To: PROMETHEUS REEBOK (Rcvd) Subj: REPLY TO MSG# 315 (PROCEEDINGS) It is fair. There is always room for an "unbiased Juror" such as she. Msg#: 356 *ARENA* 09/29/88 21:22:06 (Read 12 Times) From: FLASH FIRE To: LORD BYRON (Rcvd) Subj: REPLY TO MSG# 322 (PROCEEDINGS) " O R " maybe just a bunch of goodie partiers having some fun at your expense?? Msg#: 365 *ARENA* 09/30/88 03:51:06 (Read 10 Times) From: PROMETHEUS REEBOK To: SYSOP (Rcvd) Subj: REPLY TO MSG# 337 (PROCEEDINGS) I agree that the jury should be as unbiased as possible. I'm dissappointed in the the mild maximum sentence, though. One week isn't much of a penalty - one month would be better punishment, in my opinion. Msg#: 366 *ARENA* 09/30/88 03:53:51 (Read 10 Times) From: PROMETHEUS REEBOK To: FLASH FIRE (Rcvd) Subj: REPLY TO MSG# 355 (PROCEEDINGS) Well, the issue seems to be settled. She will assist and be available for the witness stand. Msg#: 376 *ARENA* 09/30/88 11:01:55 (Read 12 Times) From: LORD BYRON To: FLASH FIRE (Rcvd) Subj: REPLY TO MSG# 356 (PROCEEDINGS) My expense more like at all your goody-goody friend's expense. That's why they call this court The Court of Last Resort. I ran all you suckers all over the board humiliating your names. Now, you need this court to save you from some more abuse. This court won't stop me and you sure as hell won't. Lord'Keep on trying'Byron. Msg#: 378 *ARENA* 09/30/88 11:18:59 (Read 12 Times) From: LORD BYRON To: FLASH FIRE (Rcvd) Subj: REPLY TO MSG# 355 (PROCEEDINGS) Unbiased?! Man are you on something? Lord'Just wondering'Byron. Msg#: 390 *ARENA* 09/30/88 17:34:38 (Read 12 Times) From: THE BATWOMAN To: SYSOP (Rcvd) Subj: REPLY TO MSG# 337 (PROCEEDINGS) Perhaps you should do a little advertising on some of the other sigs. Lots of people might not know that Lordy is on trial. Msg#: 414 *ARENA* 09/30/88 19:55:50 (Read 11 Times) From: SYSOP To: PROMETHEUS REEBOK (Rcvd) Subj: REPLY TO MSG# 365 (PROCEEDINGS) I must keep repeating myself, but it's necessary and not a reflection on you: since this is an experimental trial, and since Lord Byron's infractions are a first time offense - AND since he received only the private message pointing out his behavior - and, not to mention that he's guarranteed freedom of speech within the proper confines of the board, except to the extreme - I must fix the maximum sentence at one week. I consider this trial a warning that I will not allow The Batboard to EVER degenerate into an immature kiddie bbs... I do recognize that such confrontations can be amusing, and therefore we have the Arena, but I still felt a warning was necessary. Also, I do not wish to lose Lord Byron as a member. As is the basis of criminal law in this country, once he has served his time, he has PAYED his dues to the bbs, and unless he breaks the laws of this system again he will not be held liable for his previous acts. In other words, I believe this case calls for rehabilitation. ***** Sysop Msg#: 419 *ARENA* 09/30/88 20:10:03 (Read 13 Times) From: SYSOP To: THE BATWOMAN (Rcvd) Subj: REPLY TO MSG# 390 (PROCEEDINGS) As the ONLINE function will show you, our callers at 300 baud have been few! I think things will really open up when the cable arrives, though... ***** Sysop Msg#: 443 *ARENA* *PRIVATE* Msg#: 444 *ARENA* 10/01/88 00:44:14 (Read 12 Times) From: FLASH FIRE To: LORD BYRON (Rcvd) Subj: REPLY TO MSG# 378 (PROCEEDINGS) Hey Lordy, what I'm "ON" is something you'll never achieve. . . Flash ' on an intellectual HIGH ' Fire Msg#: 466 *ARENA* 10/01/88 14:38:25 (Read 11 Times) From: PROMETHEUS REEBOK To: SYSOP (Rcvd) Subj: REPLY TO MSG# 414 (PROCEEDINGS) I'll not complain again, until recidivism rears its ugly head.... Msg#: 500 *ARENA* 10/02/88 02:03:39 (Read 13 Times) From: LORD BYRON To: THE BATWOMAN (Rcvd) Subj: REPLY TO MSG# 390 (PROCEEDINGS) Woman, you know that they don't want to get humiliated by me so stop wasting time with reinforcements. This old hag can't take it. She needs help as usual. Lord'It wouldn't do you any good anyway'Byron. Msg#: 503 *ARENA* *PRIVATE* Msg#: 504 *ARENA* 10/02/88 02:18:56 (Read 13 Times) From: LORD BYRON To: FLASH FIRE (Rcvd) Subj: REPLY TO MSG# 444 (PROCEEDINGS) Yeah, don't all liars like to hide the truth. As speaking for intellectuals, I'm one of the more intellectual on this board. Lord'And that's no lie'Byron. Msg#: 523 *ARENA* *PRIVATE* Msg#: 524 *ARENA* 10/02/88 11:44:05 (Read 12 Times) From: FLASH FIRE To: LORD BYRON (Rcvd) Subj: REPLY TO MSG# 504 (PROCEEDINGS) Just how did you aquire the title "LORDY". It maybe is LORDY of the dregs of the earth? Inferiority reigns supreme amongst those with such a high opinion of themselves. The way you cut on the woman must mean you have never had one. No wonder your so frustrated. . Flash 'en u the news' Fire Msg#: 537 *ARENA* 10/02/88 17:16:24 (Read 11 Times) From: THE BATWOMAN To: SYSOP (Rcvd) Subj: REPLY TO MSG# 419 (PROCEEDINGS) So solly the cabre wourdn't wolk. Wha evah hoppen to ol' Hop Sing, (wasn't that his name?) anyway? tbw Msg#: 553 *ARENA* *PRIVATE* Msg#: 554 *ARENA* 10/02/88 18:38:29 (Read 11 Times) From: LORD BYRON To: FLASH FIRE (Rcvd) Subj: REPLY TO MSG# 524 (PROCEEDINGS) In your wildest dreams, getting laid was never a problem for me. A very big overestimate of calling those those two lesbains, women. More like you, boy with a name like "Flash". You want to show some women that you have something but just a mere illusion. Inferiority?! Sucker, you know and everybody knows who owns The Arena. Lord'Of course, I'Byron. Msg#: 563 *ARENA* 10/02/88 19:10:08 (Read 12 Times) From: SYSOP To: THE BATWOMAN (Rcvd) Subj: REPLY TO MSG# 537 (PROCEEDINGS) That turkey hasn't been seen in the Cave for nearly a year now... he only logs on from work when he has the chance. The man had some good recipies, too... ***** Sysop Msg#: 567 *ARENA* 10/02/88 21:42:11 (Read 12 Times) From: PROMETHEUS REEBOK To: FLASH FIRE (Rcvd) Subj: REPLY TO MSG# 524 (PROCEEDINGS) I think it's called a "Feriority Complex" in this case. Msg#: 585 *ARENA* 10/03/88 08:24:06 (Read 12 Times) From: THE BATWOMAN To: SYSOP (Rcvd) Subj: REPLY TO MSG# 563 (PROCEEDINGS) If you see him, tell him that he's missed. tbw Msg#: 596 *ARENA* *PRIVATE* Msg#: 597 *ARENA* 10/03/88 09:46:49 (Read 10 Times) From: FLASH FIRE To: LORD BYRON (Rcvd) Subj: REPLY TO MSG# 554 (PROCEEDINGS) Lordy, Lordy hit a sore spot did I??? You will find that the one who owns the ARENA is the one with the switch to turn your write mode off. Ain't that right Sysop!! . . Flash ' en you my best ' Fire Msg#: 617 *ARENA* 10/03/88 13:11:09 (Read 13 Times) From: LORD BYRON To: PROMETHEUS REEBOK (Rcvd) Subj: REPLY TO MSG# 567 (PROCEEDINGS) Say Amateur, why don't you shut the hell up before I have to hurt you. Lord'The intimidating'Byron. Msg#: 619 *ARENA* *PRIVATE* Msg#: 620 *ARENA* 10/03/88 13:18:13 (Read 13 Times) From: LORD BYRON To: FLASH FIRE (Rcvd) Subj: REPLY TO MSG# 597 (PROCEEDINGS) Yeah go get the sysop you little wimp. Sucker, you NEED help against me. Yeah, you'd love for him to turn off the right mode so I can't hurt you boy. Say boy, why do you go hang out with those other lesbians in MY Arena. I don't see anybody tough enough to take it from me. Lord'You know who owns this Arena'Byron. Msg#: 721 *ARENA* 10/04/88 18:06:05 (Read 11 Times) From: FLASH FIRE To: LORD BYRON (Rcvd) Subj: REPLY TO MSG# 620 (PROCEEDINGS) Lordy, I been hanging out with those two women for a while. Better than being hung out on a rope. . Flash ' a dope on a rope ' Fire Msg#: 316 *ARENA* 09/29/88 03:23:15 (Read 16 Times) From: PROMETHEUS REEBOK To: CAPTAIN ZINGER (Rcvd) Subj: REPLY TO MSG# 286 (PROCEEDINGS) You can count on my attendance, if his Honor will oblige. I'm afraid that I'll have to counter your objection with the assertion that your client made a concerted effort to contact the jurors - to harrass them, in fact. The court is not responsible for your client's actions. Do you wish to delete this msg(y/n)? N Msg#: 321 *ARENA* 09/29/88 16:37:22 (Read 15 Times) From: LORD BYRON To: PROMETHEUS REEBOK (Rcvd) Subj: REPLY TO MSG# 316 (PROCEEDINGS) You tell him, Prometheus. Your mommy did a good job with that reply. You can't stop me boy. Lord'The unstoppable'Byron. Msg#: 327 *ARENA* *PRIVATE* 09/29/88 17:26:17 (Read 4 Times) From: CAPTAIN ZINGER To: PROMETHEUS REEBOK (Rcvd) Subj: REPLY TO MSG# 316 (PROCEEDINGS) It is the position of the defense that it is the responsibility of the court to warn a defendant of his rights against self incrimintion and to determine if he understands that his behavior is prejudicial and to take any action deemed appropriate to assure the just conduct of the trial and the rights of the defendant. Even if that does not necessarily meet with the defendant's approval. Having had experience before this court, I am prepared to accept his ruling on my motion after reading this "bench" pleading. Any ruing posted prior I will ignore unless confirmed as a response to this post. I feel sure that the court will listen to argument before making any rulings as a matter of proceedure in this trial. Do you wish to delete this msg(y/n)? N Msg#: 332 *ARENA* *PRIVATE* 09/29/88 18:13:03 (Read 4 Times) From: SYSOP To: CAPTAIN ZINGER (Rcvd) Subj: REPLY TO MSG# 327 (PROCEEDINGS) Counselor, I have indeed applied just that rule in warning your client that he should maintain his silence during the trial, and will TAKE steps to guarrantee order in this Court if necessary. ***** Sysop Do you wish to delete this msg(y/n)? N Msg#: 349 *ARENA* *PRIVATE* 09/29/88 20:47:17 (Read 3 Times) From: SYSOP To: CAPTAIN ZINGER (Rcvd) Subj: REPLY TO MSG# 332 (PROCEEDINGS) Ok, the only official trial string has the subject "Batboard vs. Lord Byron". Byron has a perfect right to post anything constituti ng "verbal warfare" on ANY other Arena message string... he always did that, he just went a bit too far and started posting them in the public sections. As for the trial string, he should not leave or reply to posts there without either your approval or mine... and, as you said yourself, it would be beneficial to his defense if he was to keep a "courteous" profile when leaving messages anywhere else but the Arena. Y'see, people CHOOSE whether or not to read the Arena... that's why it's a "verbal war" area, because it's NOT accessed by the ReadAll command. I DID put some thought into the layout of this system, using the experiences gained on bbs's for 4 previous years... this is the best Batboard ever! (my opinion, of course, but others seem to agree!) ***** M Do you wish to delete this msg(y/n)? N Msg#: 351 *ARENA* *PRIVATE* 09/29/88 21:02:24 (Read 3 Times) From: SYSOP To: CAPTAIN ZINGER (Rcvd) Subj: REPLY TO MSG# 332 (PROCEEDINGS) (Isn't it, though? Another first for The Batboard... we were the first with an online user-written adventure (the BatSaga) and the first with a true adults-only section)... I will instruct each "section" of the trial... Burke may examine a witness, but before the next witness is called you'll have time to respond, even with an objection). ***** M Do you wish to delete this msg(y/n)? N Msg#: 352 *ARENA* *PRIVATE* 09/29/88 21:05:43 (Read 4 Times) From: SYSOP To: CAPTAIN ZINGER (Rcvd) Subj: REPLY TO MSG# 332 (PROCEEDINGS) Certainly! Your client is under YOUR control... ***** M Do you wish to delete this msg(y/n)? N Msg#: 399 *ARENA* *PRIVATE* 09/30/88 18:55:29 (Read 3 Times) From: CAPTAIN ZINGER To: SYSOP (Rcvd) Subj: REPLY TO MSG# 349 (PROCEEDINGS) So how does message 377 wind up as a remaining post, your honor? I must now be advised by the court as to whether the nature of the ARENA takes precedence over the sanctity of the court. If the court acknowleges this as acceptable behavior anywhere in the arena, then I need to know. If it does NOT so hold, then I must AGAIN rewquest that the defendent be allowed only to speak to YOU or ME in this court. C 'this is SOOOOO confusing' Z Do you wish to delete this msg(y/n)? N Msg#: 402 *ARENA* *PRIVATE* 09/30/88 19:14:40 (Read 2 Times) From: CAPTAIN ZINGER To: SYSOP (Rcvd) Subj: REPLY TO MSG# 352 (PROCEEDINGS) (long sigh expressing light to moderate frustration only) Please, your honor, leave my posts to which you reply available for me to refer back to at least one message back. Apparently he is NOT under my control as he can and did jump up ranting in open court (re #377). I respectfully (again) request that you do whatever in your power to eliminate both the POSSIBILITY of that occurring again, and the horribly deleterious effects it ha on my case! ****C 'gotta know ALL the rules, judge bean, sir' Z**** Do you wish to delete this msg(y/n)? N Msg#: 421 *ARENA* 09/30/88 20:13:27 (Read 12 Times) From: SYSOP To: CAPTAIN ZINGER (Rcvd) Subj: REPLY TO MSG# 399 (PROCEEDINGS) Counselor, the Arena is open to your client as an entertainment while the Court hears his case, and I will caution jurors to remember that he IS posting in the proper section for his brand of "verbal warfare", and THEY are choosing to reply to his taunts... Byron will NOT be held liable for ANYTHING said within the confines of the Arena EXCEPT for the message string entitled 'BATBOARD VS. LORD BYRON'... he has already broken this rule, and the Court will admonish him ONCE. If he again breaks into the string, I shall make his access read-only, as I promised. Now, Counselor, I am anxious to see your opening statements... the course of the trial must not be delayed now that all points are clear. I expect to see your opening remarks within your next two logons. ***** Sysop The Judge Do you wish to delete this msg(y/n)? N Msg#: 422 *ARENA* *PRIVATE* 09/30/88 20:18:39 (Read 4 Times) From: SYSOP To: CAPTAIN ZINGER (Rcvd) Subj: REPLY TO MSG# 402 (PROCEEDINGS) Agreed on all counts. I'll offer him ONE warning first, Counselor, and again I commend you on your work for your client... ***** M Do you wish to delete this msg(y/n)? N Msg#: 636 *ARENA* *PRIVATE* 10/03/88 18:35:12 (Read 3 Times) From: CAPTAIN ZINGER To: SYSOP (Rcvd) Subj: REPLY TO MSG# 422 (PROCEEDINGS) Your honor, I don't care what he wants. I want him gagged in the courtroom. I have been under the impression that he would NOT be allowed to speak in court since we started. C'mon. Give me a chance. Gag him and strike his outburst from the record! Do you wish to delete this msg(y/n)? N Msg#: 664 *ARENA* *PRIVATE* 10/04/88 00:15:46 (Read 2 Times) From: SYSOP To: CAPTAIN ZINGER (Rcvd) Subj: REPLY TO MSG# 636 (PROCEEDINGS) I've warned him and deleted his reply... sufficient? Besides, I don't want to remove the kid from the fun he's having otherwise... I may hold a change of venue and move the trial string to General Ranting... agreed? ***** Sysop Do you wish to delete this msg(y/n)? N Msg#: 324 *ARENA* 09/29/88 16:49:43 (Read 14 Times) From: PROMETHEUS REEBOK To: SYSOP (Rcvd) Subj: MAXIMUM SENTENCE Two questions, your Honor: (1) What is the maximum sentence for the crimes charged?; and (2) Has the accused had the opportunity to enter a plea? Msg#: 339 *ARENA* 09/29/88 18:31:45 (Read 14 Times) From: SYSOP To: PROMETHEUS REEBOK (Rcvd) Subj: REPLY TO MSG# 324 (MAXIMUM SENTENCE) Mr. Prosecutor, the defendent has entered a plea of 'Not Guilty' in an earlier message. On what grounds, we have yet to hear - I will expect the defense to enter grounds for a 'Not Guilty' plea quite soon. The maximum sentence for 'crimes against the userlog' is banishment to the 'MOO?' mode for a period not to exceed one week, and strict probation to limit further infractions by posting so-called "verbal warfare" in the Arena area ONLY. ***** Sysop The Judge Msg#: 357 *ARENA* 09/29/88 21:27:24 (Read 12 Times) From: FLASH FIRE To: SYSOP (Rcvd) Subj: REPLY TO MSG# 339 (MAXIMUM SENTENCE) Will the jury be instructed that if they were to find the defendant guilty of a lesser crime then that charged that they have the option to impose a less harsh sentence, or is this juror jumping the gun?? Msg#: 363 *ARENA* 09/30/88 03:40:24 (Read 12 Times) From: PROMETHEUS REEBOK To: SYSOP (Rcvd) Subj: REPLY TO MSG# 339 (MAXIMUM SENTENCE) Doesn't "verbal warfare" imply mutual participation? Seems like it would be called "terrorism" in any other case.... Msg#: 398 *ARENA* 09/30/88 18:40:55 (Read 11 Times) From: CAPTAIN ZINGER To: PROMETHEUS REEBOK (Rcvd) Subj: REPLY TO MSG# 363 (MAXIMUM SENTENCE) Begging your pardon, Mr. Prosecutor, but such discussion here may add bias to the jury which is now seated. Therefore I must state tat it appears that entering the arena is prima facia evidence of mutual participation, and failure to "war" back implies self-destru ctive tendencies on the part of the attacked, rather that "terrorism" on the part of the attacker. But, can we keep these kinds of discussions private in the future, or argue such salient points inside the courtroom itself? I thank you, esteemed counselor. Do you wish to delete this msg(y/n)? N Msg#: 409 *ARENA* 09/30/88 19:44:00 (Read 11 Times) From: SYSOP To: FLASH FIRE (Rcvd) Subj: REPLY TO MSG# 357 (MAXIMUM SENTENCE) Of course a lesser punishment may be called for, and you are quite right to bring up that fact... I would have mentioned it in my closing comments to the jury before they decide, and will still do it. ***** Sysop The Judge Msg#: 412 *ARENA* 09/30/88 19:48:55 (Read 12 Times) From: SYSOP To: PROMETHEUS REEBOK (Rcvd) Subj: REPLY TO MSG# 363 (MAXIMUM SENTENCE) The Arena's purpose is to provide a battleground for verbal warfare for THOSE WHO WISH TO BE HERE... that's why it is not combinable with the ReadAll command, because I didn't think most of the members would like it... until the trial was moved here, that's what it has been, and that's what it will return to once the trial is finished! The whole idea for the charges of 'crimes against the usrlog' is that Lord Byron allegedly did not restrain his comments to this portion of the board, and was personally abusive to those who did NOT wish to participate in a "war"... this has been clearly stated in the system rules since this board adopted the Arena over a year ago. Let me state policy again, for all who wish to take note: the Arena is the ONLY place where "cutdowns" and "warring" in the EXTREME (defining extreme as without consent of another or to a point where I consider it abusive) may take place... ***** Sysop Msg#: 442 *ARENA* 10/01/88 00:35:37 (Read 13 Times) From: FLASH FIRE To: CAPTAIN ZINGER (Rcvd) Subj: REPLY TO MSG# 398 (MAXIMUM SENTENCE) Esteemed Counsel Zinger, you should spend your time more constructively. Instead of trying to argue about biasing the jury you should be trying to convince us in the courtroom that your client is not guilty. Do you wish to delete this msg(y/n)? N Msg#: 452 *ARENA* 10/01/88 09:53:15 (Read 14 Times) From: NERP TWIRD To: SYSOP (Rcvd) Subj: REPLY TO MSG# 409 (MAXIMUM SENTENCE) Hey, Judgy! Let's get on with this thing, hungh?! I've got some biscuits in the oven and a lot of errands to run! I say hang him! Nerp Msg#: 460 *ARENA* 10/01/88 12:26:56 (Read 15 Times) From: SYSOP To: NERP TWIRD (Rcvd) Subj: REPLY TO MSG# 452 (MAXIMUM SENTENCE) Hee hee... I have pressed our defense counsel for his opening remarks, and the trial should continue soon... ***** 'Judge Roy' Sysop Msg#: 464 *ARENA* *PRIVATE* 10/01/88 14:31:43 (Read 4 Times) From: PROMETHEUS REEBOK To: CAPTAIN ZINGER (Rcvd) Subj: REPLY TO MSG# 398 (MAXIMUM SENTENCE) I agree that these messages should be private. I'll dispute your claim that entry into the Arena constitutes participation, though. Do you wish to delete this msg(y/n)? N Msg#: 465 *ARENA* 10/01/88 14:36:15 (Read 12 Times) From: PROMETHEUS REEBOK To: SYSOP (Rcvd) Subj: REPLY TO MSG# 412 (MAXIMUM SENTENCE) Thanks for the clarification, yer Honor. Does this mean we can't hang him? Msg#: 501 *ARENA* 10/02/88 02:09:29 (Read 14 Times) From: LORD BYRON To: NERP TWIRD (Rcvd) Subj: REPLY TO MSG# 452 (MAXIMUM SENTENCE) So little idiotic Nerp has crept his way in my Arena. I think that you better leave before I make 'biscuits' out of you, you little illiterate punk. Lord'That's a sucker for you'Byron. Msg#: 509 *ARENA* 10/02/88 09:31:44 (Read 14 Times) From: NERP TWIRD To: SYSOP (Rcvd) Subj: REPLY TO MSG# 460 (MAXIMUM SENTENCE) Well okay. How much do you get for jury duty around here anyway? I still say hang him! Nerp Msg#: 510 *ARENA* 10/02/88 09:33:21 (Read 14 Times) From: NERP TWIRD To: LORD BYRON (Rcvd) Subj: REPLY TO MSG# 501 (MAXIMUM SENTENCE) Keep on typing, fella.......while you still can. I just got back from the noose store and do I have something nice for you!! Nerp Msg#: 514 *ARENA* 10/02/88 10:18:33 (Read 13 Times) From: SYSOP To: PROMETHEUS REEBOK (Rcvd) Subj: REPLY TO MSG# 465 (MAXIMUM SENTENCE) No way to enforce the sentence, Mr. Reebok. We could, however, string up his cat... (especially if it's named Bill) ***** Sysop The Judge Msg#: 521 *ARENA* 10/02/88 10:35:38 (Read 15 Times) From: SYSOP To: NERP TWIRD (Rcvd) Subj: REPLY TO MSG# 509 (MAXIMUM SENTENCE) Nothing but a smile and a handshake... but that was enough for the King, right? ***** Sysop Msg#: 547 *ARENA* 10/02/88 18:12:46 (Read 14 Times) From: NERP TWIRD To: SYSOP (Rcvd) Subj: REPLY TO MSG# 521 (MAXIMUM SENTENCE) A smile and a handshake, eh? It's okay by me......I wonder if my landlord would go for it?! Well it's certainly worth a try! ....then there's the grocer, and the plumber, then the dentist......this could really be SOMETHING!!....... Nerp! Msg#: 552 *ARENA* 10/02/88 18:33:09 (Read 12 Times) From: LORD BYRON To: NERP TWIRD (Rcvd) Subj: REPLY TO MSG# 510 (MAXIMUM SENTENCE) Don't worry boy. If I do leave, I'm going to have a surprise for all you suckers out there. Another biased juror, everybody knows why, the little piss-ant punk can't take it. Yeah, keep on dreaming with the noose, boy. Nobody is MAN enough around here to noose Lord Byron. Lord'Your threats only amuse me'Byron. Msg#: 565 *ARENA* 10/02/88 19:15:52 (Read 13 Times) From: SYSOP To: NERP TWIRD (Rcvd) Subj: REPLY TO MSG# 547 (MAXIMUM SENTENCE) BARTER... gawd, I love that word... ***** 'how much for the pig?' Sysop Msg#: 566 *ARENA* 10/02/88 21:40:57 (Read 12 Times) From: PROMETHEUS REEBOK To: SYSOP (Rcvd) Subj: REPLY TO MSG# 514 (MAXIMUM SENTENCE) Well...ok. Msg#: 587 *ARENA* 10/03/88 08:25:22 (Read 12 Times) From: THE BATWOMAN To: PROMETHEUS REEBOK (Rcvd) Subj: REPLY TO MSG# 566 (MAXIMUM SENTENCE) Counselor, His Honor has said that we have three more witnesses that we may use. With my testimony, that will give us four witnesses for the prosecution. Our case is getting stronger and stronger. Let's invite the witnesses to the cloakroom for lunch. This is cause for celebration. Sis Msg#: 595 *ARENA* 10/03/88 09:42:57 (Read 13 Times) From: FLASH FIRE To: SYSOP (Rcvd) Subj: REPLY TO MSG# 565 (MAXIMUM SENTENCE) Forget about the pig as I heard Lordy Byron has been shackin up with it for a while. Msg#: 598 *ARENA* 10/03/88 10:03:27 (Read 11 Times) From: NERP TWIRD To: LORD BYRON (Rcvd) Subj: REPLY TO MSG# 552 (MAXIMUM SENTENCE) Might as well be amused now, By. Nerp Msg#: 599 *ARENA* 10/03/88 10:05:26 (Read 11 Times) From: NERP TWIRD To: SYSOP (Rcvd) Subj: REPLY TO MSG# 565 (MAXIMUM SENTENCE) The pig?! What ya got ta trade, Bat? Nerp 'Swoparama' Twird Msg#: 609 *ARENA* 10/03/88 11:53:09 (Read 14 Times) From: SYSOP To: FLASH FIRE (Rcvd) Subj: REPLY TO MSG# 595 (MAXIMUM SENTENCE) As a judge I'm only allowed to smirk. I am doing so presently. ***** Sysop The Judge Msg#: 610 *ARENA* 10/03/88 11:54:42 (Read 14 Times) From: SYSOP To: NERP TWIRD (Rcvd) Subj: REPLY TO MSG# 599 (MAXIMUM SENTENCE) I like your chickies, Nerp... how many would you swap? ***** Sysop Msg#: 615 *ARENA* 10/03/88 13:03:34 (Read 13 Times) From: LORD BYRON To: FLASH FIRE (Rcvd) Subj: REPLY TO MSG# 595 (MAXIMUM SENTENCE) Boy, I don't do any transsexual activities like thos Jeppars. Should I say their names? Okay. The Bratwoman, Nird Turd, and Le Barren Ass. My neighbor's dog just had puppies. They're wondering if you're the father. Lord'Are you? of course'Byron. Msg#: 616 *ARENA* 10/03/88 13:08:17 (Read 13 Times) From: LORD BYRON To: SYSOP (Rcvd) Subj: REPLY TO MSG# 609 (MAXIMUM SENTENCE) Isn't it like The Court of the Last Kangaroo Resort. The judge is even biased. Lord'Look out'Byron. Msg#: 621 *ARENA* 10/03/88 13:22:05 (Read 16 Times) From: LORD BYRON To: NERP TWIRD (Rcvd) Subj: REPLY TO MSG# 598 (MAXIMUM SENTENCE) Nothing but being amused by these wimps and lezzies trying to affect me by their poor excuses for insults. Yeah, come on in, Nird Turd. You know we don't discriminate against sexual orientation, ask Bratwoman. Maybe don't, she's still crying from what I said to her. Boo hoo hoo, like I really care. Lord'Nuff said'Byron. Msg#: 628 *ARENA* 10/03/88 14:47:05 (Read 15 Times) From: PROMETHEUS REEBOK To: THE BATWOMAN (Rcvd) Subj: REPLY TO MSG# 587 (MAXIMUM SENTENCE) Sounds lovely - I'll make those lovely canapes again, if you'll do the entrees. I vote for the tuna croquettes! Msg#: 630 *ARENA* 10/03/88 14:52:31 (Read 15 Times) From: PROMETHEUS REEBOK To: NERP TWIRD (Rcvd) Subj: REPLY TO MSG# 598 (MAXIMUM SENTENCE) Like I said - he's claiming "Guilty, but so what?" Msg#: 637 *ARENA* 10/03/88 18:39:46 (Read 15 Times) From: CAPTAIN ZINGER To: FLASH FIRE (Rcvd) Subj: REPLY TO MSG# 442 (MAXIMUM SENTENCE) Now look here. I have watched enough TV to know just exactly what I am doing and hope that before you start second guessing me you go talk to the Baronness if you think I need heckled! OK? ****C 'women get a bigger rize outa me, frog or not' Z**** Do you wish to delete this msg(y/n)? N Msg#: 333 *ARENA* 09/29/88 18:15:34 (Read 15 Times) From: SYSOP To: CAPTAIN ZINGER (Rcvd) Subj: REPLY TO MSG# 286 (PROCEEDINGS) Counsel, your client has been duly warned of both his rights and his responsibilities... and you now have the right to private consultations with him if necessary. This IS a Court of justice, and I will enforce whatever the jury decides... ***** Sysop The Judge Do you wish to delete this msg(y/n)? N Msg#: 393 *ARENA* 09/30/88 18:01:06 (Read 13 Times) From: KITTY KATT To: CAPTAIN ZINGER (Rcvd) Subj: REPLY TO MSG# 286 (PROCEEDINGS) Does this mean there will be JURY TAMPERING???? ( wow! This could get interesting! Jury duty has NEVER been this much fun!) Do you wish to delete this msg(y/n)? N Msg#: 403 *ARENA* 09/30/88 19:19:09 (Read 10 Times) From: CAPTAIN ZINGER To: KITTY KATT Subj: REPLY TO MSG# 393 (PROCEEDINGS) Captain Zinger, little putty-tat, is always available in the cloakroom whenever court is in recess, to assist in any tampering going on, including stroking the fur of a cute little pussy. Do you wish to delete this msg(y/n)? N Msg#: 437 *ARENA* 10/01/88 00:14:32 (Read 13 Times) From: LE BARONESS To: KITTY KATT Subj: REPLY TO MSG# 393 (PROCEEDINGS) Be careful his frog will get jealous. Msg#: 445 *ARENA* 10/01/88 02:52:43 (Read 12 Times) From: JOHANN SCHMAT To: SYSOP (Rcvd) Subj: MAXIMUM SENTENCE Thank you for explaining the reasoning behind the charges against Mr. Byron. It will make my work much easier. Msg#: 622 *ARENA* 10/03/88 13:27:23 (Read 15 Times) From: LORD BYRON To: ALL Subj: LORD BYRON'S ARENA For all you who want to know. Yes, this is MY Arena. And you are my little piss-ant underlings. Lord'Nuff said'Byron. Msg#: 629 *ARENA* 10/03/88 14:49:29 (Read 15 Times) From: PROMETHEUS REEBOK To: LORD BYRON (Rcvd) Subj: REPLY TO MSG# 615 (MAXIMUM SENTENCE) Just a point of clarification - the Jeepers Creepers practice TransAxel activities, not transexual (which would be difficult, in any case). Msg#: 658 *ARENA* 10/03/88 23:50:40 (Read 15 Times) From: LORD BYRON To: PROMETHEUS REEBOK (Rcvd) Subj: REPLY TO MSG# 629 (MAXIMUM SENTENCE) Oh you know all about their sexual activities. If you do, I hate to tell you, you probably have AIDS. So go back to San Francisco and oh yeah, and bring those two lesbians with you, O.k? Lord'I hope I clarified that matter'Byron. Msg#: 659 *ARENA* 10/03/88 23:54:39 (Read 15 Times) From: LORD BYRON To: CAPTAIN ZINGER (Rcvd) Subj: REPLY TO MSG# 637 (MAXIMUM SENTENCE) Hey don't worry about him, Zinger. This Flash guy is definitely showing his sexual frustrations to all of us. I wish he'd talk about his sexual frustrations to somebody else, like to Tammy Faye Bakker. Lord'Wouldn't they make a great couple'Byron. Do you wish to delete this msg(y/n)? N Msg#: 773 *ARENA* 10/05/88 16:46:51 (Read 9 Times) From: CAPTAIN ZINGER To: LORD BYRON (Rcvd) Subj: REPLY TO MSG# 659 (MAXIMUM SENTENCE) I understand, Ben. Do you wish to delete this msg(y/n)? Y Msg#: 661 *ARENA* 10/04/88 00:08:02 (Read 15 Times) From: SYSOP To: LORD BYRON (Rcvd) Subj: REPLY TO MSG# 616 (MAXIMUM SENTENCE) Take the Judge's word for it - you WILL get what you deserve, whatever a impartial jury decides. Be glad this is happening in the Cave, where free speech is practiced - if you were on one of those kiddie Atari or Commordore boards, not only would I have locked you out immmediately, I would have posted your password in the public area of every board in town. You have been warned... a combination Judge and Sysop is NOT to be messed with... ***** 'not by the likes of you, anyway' Sysop Msg#: 804 *ARENA* 10/06/88 02:25:14 (Read 6 Times) From: LORD BYRON To: SYSOP (Rcvd) Subj: REPLY TO MSG# 661 (MAXIMUM SENTENCE) I wonder how 'impartial' this jury really is. Half of them have argued with me and inevitably lost. Also, my passwords are different on every board. If some people want to be close-minded that's their choice. The impartiality of the jurors are indeed suspect. Lord'Just the facts'Byron. Msg#: 818 *ARENA* 10/06/88 06:53:58 (Read 5 Times) From: SYSOP To: LORD BYRON Subj: REPLY TO MSG# 804 (MAXIMUM SENTENCE) Better than no trial at all, right? No, I wouldn't put someone's life on the line with this proceeding, no, but then again we're only talking about MOO? mode for a week... I like experiments when it comes to bulletin boards... ***** Sysop Msg#: 683 *ARENA* 10/04/88 08:50:00 (Read 15 Times) From: THE BATWOMAN To: PROMETHEUS REEBOK (Rcvd) Subj: REPLY TO MSG# 628 (MAXIMUM SENTENCE) Sounds great! If I bring the tzatziki, will you bring the Triscuits? tbw Msg#: 695 *ARENA* 10/04/88 10:46:00 (Read 15 Times) From: SYSOP To: THE BATWOMAN (Rcvd) Subj: REPLY TO MSG# 683 (MAXIMUM SENTENCE) Now hold on just a second here... I recognize 'Triscuits', but WHAT was that other substance? ***** 'and keep it away from me until you explain...' Sysop Msg#: 706 *ARENA* 10/04/88 17:17:19 (Read 12 Times) From: PROMETHEUS REEBOK To: THE BATWOMAN (Rcvd) Subj: REPLY TO MSG# 683 (MAXIMUM SENTENCE) Tzatziki? Msg#: 746 *ARENA* 10/05/88 08:30:16 (Read 12 Times) From: THE BATWOMAN To: SYSOP (Rcvd) Subj: REPLY TO MSG# 695 (MAXIMUM SENTENCE) It's a Greek dish, a yogurt-cucumber dip that is unbelievably good. You can dip anything in it (almost), veggies, chips, crackers. I like Triscuits. Sis Msg#: 747 *ARENA* 10/05/88 08:32:22 (Read 12 Times) From: THE BATWOMAN To: PROMETHEUS REEBOK Subj: REPLY TO MSG# 706 (MAXIMUM SENTENCE) Yeah. We can wear togas, too! See previous message to Mr. Sysop. Msg#: 756 *ARENA* 10/05/88 09:57:27 (Read 8 Times) From: ALAN JENNINGS To: THE BATWOMAN (Rcvd) Subj: REPLY TO MSG# 683 (MAXIMUM SENTENCE) Excuse me, ma'am. What is tzatziki? Is it anything like Cafe le Nerpeaux Twirdeaux? Rev. --in need of caffiene-- Jennings. Msg#: 805 *ARENA* 10/06/88 02:30:24 (Read 6 Times) From: LORD BYRON To: THE BATWOMAN (Rcvd) Subj: REPLY TO MSG# 683 (MAXIMUM SENTENCE) That's something you don't hear everyday. Two dips talking about Triscuits. Lord'Hit them where it hurts'Byron. Msg#: 821 *ARENA* 10/06/88 08:55:04 (Read 5 Times) From: THE BATWOMAN To: ALAN JENNINGS Subj: REPLY TO MSG# 756 (MAXIMUM SENTENCE) No, it's a yogurt-cucumber dip that is delicious. You'd love it. Msg#: 687 *ARENA* 10/04/88 09:20:54 (Read 15 Times) From: NERP TWIRD To: SYSOP (Rcvd) Subj: REPLY TO MSG# 610 (MAXIMUM SENTENCE) How many ya want? Nerp Msg#: 738 *ARENA* 10/05/88 06:45:24 (Read 12 Times) From: NERP TWIRD To: SYSOP (Rcvd) Subj: REPLY TO MSG# 697 (MAXIMUM SENTENCE) How many ya think? N Msg#: 760 *ARENA* 10/05/88 11:49:28 (Read 9 Times) From: SYSOP To: NERP TWIRD Subj: REPLY TO MSG# 738 (MAXIMUM SENTENCE) Wouldn't take less than 4 layin' hens, or 3 hens and a basket of apples. ***** Sysop Msg#: 688 *ARENA* 10/04/88 09:22:14 (Read 16 Times) From: NERP TWIRD To: LORD BYRON (Rcvd) Subj: REPLY TO MSG# 621 (MAXIMUM SENTENCE) How long have you had these hallucinations? And who do you get to type your messages in for ya? Your little brother? So sad. A wasted mind is a terrible thing to loose. Nerp Msg#: 806 *ARENA* 10/06/88 02:33:10 (Read 6 Times) From: LORD BYRON To: NERP TWIRD Subj: REPLY TO MSG# 688 (MAXIMUM SENTENCE) Ah, using my own dialogue against me. It shows you have no sense of the word "originality". Try something you made up. No, bad idea, it would probably stupid even for you. Lord'Nird taking lessons from the best'Byron. Msg#: 689 *ARENA* 10/04/88 09:26:11 (Read 15 Times) From: NERP TWIRD To: PROMETHEUS REEBOK (Rcvd) Subj: REPLY TO MSG# 630 (MAXIMUM SENTENCE) Great! So when do we hang him?!! Nerp Msg#: 707 *ARENA* 10/04/88 17:18:30 (Read 13 Times) From: PROMETHEUS REEBOK To: NERP TWIRD (Rcvd) Subj: REPLY TO MSG# 689 (MAXIMUM SENTENCE) We've gotta wait until the trial's over - unless you'd rather LYNCH THE LITTLE BASTARD! Oops! Looks like I let my temper get the better of me. Tsk, tsk! Msg#: 739 *ARENA* 10/05/88 06:46:30 (Read 12 Times) From: NERP TWIRD To: PROMETHEUS REEBOK Subj: REPLY TO MSG# 707 (MAXIMUM SENTENCE) Oh! Well wake me for the hangin', okay? NT Msg#: 745 *ARENA* 10/05/88 08:28:19 (Read 11 Times) From: THE BATWOMAN To: NERP TWIRD Subj: REPLY TO MSG# 739 (MAXIMUM SENTENCE) I'll bring the margaritas if you'll bring the nachos! It'll be a FUN little hangin' party, hungh?? Sis Msg#: 807 *ARENA* 10/06/88 02:36:04 (Read 6 Times) From: LORD BYRON To: NERP TWIRD Subj: REPLY TO MSG# 689 (MAXIMUM SENTENCE) Oh, I see another 'impartial' juror voicing his opinion. The only one who will be hanging is you, by your testicles if only the executioner can find them. Lord'The sometimes dirty'Byron. Msg#: 808 *ARENA* 10/06/88 02:39:59 (Read 6 Times) From: LORD BYRON To: PROMETHEUS REEBOK Subj: REPLY TO MSG# 707 (MAXIMUM SENTENCE) Yeah, that's not the only thing that got the 'better' of you. Pro, you're just a sore loser with a child's temper. I guess all feeble minds like Pro's are like that. Lord'The best'Byron. Msg#: 809 *ARENA* 10/06/88 02:42:33 (Read 6 Times) From: LORD BYRON To: THE BATWOMAN (Rcvd) Subj: REPLY TO MSG# 745 (MAXIMUM SENTENCE) Food's always on your mind, eh fat slob. Lord'I hate pigs'Byron. Msg#: 822 *ARENA* 10/06/88 08:57:09 (Read 5 Times) From: THE BATWOMAN To: LORD BYRON Subj: REPLY TO MSG# 809 (MAXIMUM SENTENCE) Excuse me, but I'm not fat. You've never even seen me, anyway. I'm not an old hag, either. I've never lied about my age. I'm 40-years-old. I don't look 40, either. I'm married and have two children. I'm not gay. Your insults are lies. Even if your insults were based on facts and not lies, I don't think enough of you to be insulted. In fact, I don't think of you at all. Nothing you say amounts to anything at all. Msg#: 719 *ARENA* 10/04/88 18:01:24 (Read 11 Times) From: FLASH FIRE To: SYSOP (Rcvd) Subj: REPLY TO MSG# 610 (MAXIMUM SENTENCE) Sorry guys I think Lordy's playing with them chickies also. Some kinda animal fetish I think. Msg#: 720 *ARENA* 10/04/88 18:03:46 (Read 11 Times) From: FLASH FIRE To: LORD BYRON (Rcvd) Subj: REPLY TO MSG# 615 (MAXIMUM SENTENCE) My neighbors pig just had a litter and she's "SURE" they're yours. . . Flash ' a little oink for me ' Fire Msg#: 810 *ARENA* 10/06/88 02:45:04 (Read 6 Times) From: LORD BYRON To: FLASH FIRE (Rcvd) Subj: REPLY TO MSG# 720 (MAXIMUM SENTENCE) Another biter off of my great creativity and talent. Flash likes to talk about sex a lot. How long have you been impotent, Flash? Oh, you're only outlet to sexuality is pumping yourself in the bathroom, eh. Lord'That is sick, Flash. You should be ashamed of yourself.'Byron. Msg#: 862 *ARENA* 10/06/88 16:34:47 (Read 2 Times) From: FLASH FIRE To: LORD BYRON Subj: REPLY TO MSG# 810 (MAXIMUM SENTENCE) If having sex on the brain is my only fault, that must account for the smile that wont leave my face. . . Flash ' still tryin to find the 500 pounder ' Fire . Lordy I know your slow witted so checkout the proper positions SIG. Read back slowly and you might understand the last pun. Msg#: 722 *ARENA* 10/04/88 18:09:08 (Read 12 Times) From: FLASH FIRE To: CAPTAIN ZINGER (Rcvd) Subj: REPLY TO MSG# 637 (MAXIMUM SENTENCE) Hey Baroness, get out the heckling boots. . . Flash ' these boots are made for hecklin ' Fire Do you wish to delete this msg(y/n)? N Msg#: 811 *ARENA* 10/06/88 02:50:31 (Read 6 Times) From: LORD BYRON To: FLASH FIRE (Rcvd) Subj: REPLY TO MSG# 721 (PROCEEDINGS) You take pride in hanging out with lesbians, eh? Boy, you have some nasty sexual habits. Lord'I wonder if he has heard of a disease called AIDS'Byron. ***** The Arena - VERBAL BATTLES ***** "add insult without injury" oodbye ime ain menu <:>Rapid logoff ead ... Read insults can ... Scan insults eave ... Leave insults

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